Ugh! My parents are arguing again! They were on the verge of divorce, but then my mom found out she was pregnant with my baby brother Matt who's now about to turn two. Because of Matt's sake they hesitated on the divorce papers and put them on hold for now.
My parents were very religious and even though it's not like it was back then where the Catholic Church frowned upon getting divorced that was one of their many obstacles. Marriage was a one time and only thing and my parents wanted to enforce that. Be good and positive examples.
Of course Matt was crying so I had to calm him down. He's not a teenager let alone an adult yet so it was perfectly normal that he was scared. His ADHD and Autism wasn't a great help.
"Annika, Matt scared!" was all I heard come out of his mouth.
"How about we go to the park and play in the swings?" I asked.
He nodded his head so I grabbed his coat and mine and off we went.
It was nice to see Matt with a grin the size of Texas on his face. He was always a fan of swings and so was I when I was little.
"Higher! Higher!" he tried to scream but he still hasn't been able to master his g or h sound.
Seeing him laugh and smile always cured me of my mood or how I felt at the time. He had a whole life ahead of him and he had nothing to worry about now. Even though I was only 18 having my parents argue every day and having a baby brother that no one else besides me pays attention to made me grow up fast...Probably, faster than I should have to.
The park was deserted mostly because it was kind of torn down and abandoned, but Matt and I always make the best of it. It was like our secret hideout that only the two of us knew about. But it's not going to last that long. On Monday I'm leaving for a boarding school located somewhere in the countryside of Wales and I can only come back to visit on the weekends.....if my parents want to come pick me up.
Questions keep swirling through my head. Once I leave who's going to pay attention to Matt? Who's going to feed him? Tuck him in bed? Turn his Toy Story themed nightlight on? Talk to him when he has a nightmare? Play with him or even take him and pick him up at daycare?
As these questions started swirling through my head Matt brought me back to focus when he attempted to get out of the swing to go and pet the dog a stranger was walking. I have to admit the dog was adorable and she took my mind off of Matt's whereabouts temporarily. As the lady walked away with the German Shepherd I caught Matt rubbing his eyes as a signal of being tired.
"Looks like it's time for your nap time isn't it Matt?" I said. All he did was nod his head. I picked him up and started heading home with him soon fast asleep in my arms.
I was hoping the argument had stopped, but considering how unpredictable my parents are I won't know until I see it.
