The Delicate.

Curiosity.

  Ashley had invited me out with her and her friends, which included Wes. They picked me up at my house in a shiny, green Suburban. I bounded down the front steps and slid in to the backseat, noticing I was next to a girl they called Cinth. I assumed it was short for Cinthia, but didn't ask in fear of offending her or something. 

     We piled out of the SUV when we reached Silver Spring Mall. I don't know what the plan was, but we all gathered around the vehicle and just talked and gossiped. Mid- conversation, Cinth glanced down at my wrist and noticed the medical bracelet.

     " So, " she chewed her gum with an open mouth. " What's that for? Are you sick or somethin'?" 

     " Cinth, don't be so rude. " Ashley said, narrowing her eyes on her friend. Cinth rolled her dark brown eyes. 

     " No, it's okay. " I spoke up. " I have an immune disease. " 

     " Is that contagious? 'Cause I don't want to be catchin' anything from you or nuttin." Cinth said, looking me up and down. 

     " Cinthia." Ashley hissed. 

     " Whut? I'm juss checkin'." She twirled a lock of her black hair around her fingers. I glanced around, seeing everyone's eyes on me. I bet they wondered if it was contagious, too, but we're too afraid to speak up. 

     " No, " I stated. " It isn't. " 

     After that Cinth took a step away from me when Ashley's eyes glared at her for too long. She walked off, arms crossed, and began talking to another member of the group. 

     " Ignore her, " Wes said. " She's a bitch to everyone. " 

     " Oh, " I murmured, feeling my face burn. 

     " No, she really is. " Ashley chimed in, putting her arm around my shoulders. " Probably just jealous of how cute you are. " 

     I laughed, because it was a ridiculous thing to say. I had never been anything but frail my entire sickly life. Pale, scrawny, and lackluster. The only thing pretty about me was my name. I looked like a dull version of my gorgeous mother; I had her dark hair, porcelain skin, and round clear, blue eyes. We were both petite, with a tendency to never pants short enough. Even average height Ashley towered over my five foot frame. The auto immune disease had stunted my growth when my body went through puberty without producing the necessary vitamins for growth spurts. 

     Even with her stated friendship, Ashley still leaned away when I would cough. 

     " We better hurry up or we'll be late for the movie. " Wes said, looking around at everyone. At least it was better than sitting at home watching movies. In total there was probably seven of us there, and it took forever for us to get our tickets and find seats.

     The seat left open for me was next to Wes. He smiled at me then reached over and held Ashley's hand. My stomach did a little flip flop. I couldn't even look at him without blushing violently. But I just kept reminding myself that he was Ashley's boyfriend and was off-limits, especially for girls like me. 

     " Oh, sorry. " He whispered half way through the movie when his hand brushed mine in an attempt to grab his soda without looking. 

     " It's okay. " I whispered back, withdrawing my hand from the arm rest and running my fingers over the spot he touched. I mentally slapped myself and resumed watching the movie.

     After the movie ended, we all hung out in the lobby waiting for some other people to show up. I stood with my back against the cool stone wall, listening to the fountain somewhere behind me. People talked and conversed, but I was quiet for now. I had my arms crossed over my chest, and I nibbled on my bottom lip. 

     " If I'd know he'd be here, I wouldn't have came. " Someone said and I glanced over, looking for the source of the disgruntled girl. 

     " He's such a drag to be around now. " Wes said, looking dejected. I followed his stare and spotted Jackson. His lean figure walked under the light and then back into the shadows again as he walked across the parking lot. His blond hair gleamed under the moonlight. 

     " Who? Jackson?" I asked, glancing over at them.

     " You know him? " Ashley asked, wide- eyed. 

     " Um, yeah. He's in my art class. " I answered. " Why?"

     " He used to hang out with us all the time, " Wes chimed in again. " Then his mother died from a drug overdose or something and he just kind of drifted away. "

     " I heard he was on drugs now, and selling them, too. " Cinth commented, smoking in the corner. " Put a guy in the hospital for trying to steal them. "

     " Shut up, Cinthia. " Wes rolled his eyes. " Those are just rumors. "

     " Anyway, he's no fun to be around. " Ashley said, rubbing her arms to keep warm. Wes handed over his jacket and she slipped it on. I was still cold in my tank top and exposed, pale arms.  

     Probably because he lost his mom, I thought to myself, but didn't dare say it. My eyes just followed Jackson across the parking lot until he reached his pick up truck. He glanced back and I swore his eyes caught mine for that split second, but then it was gone and so was he. For some reason, my heart ached for him. 

     They dropped me off at my house a little after ten thirty and I walked up the driveway, my mom opening the door for me. She had been waiting, and probably worrying. I kicked my shoes off inside the door and plopped down on the couch. 

     " Did you have a good time? " Mom asked, ringing a dry dish towel in her hands.

     " Yeah, it was okay. " I nodded. " We watched that new movie with Tom Cruise. " 

     " Oh, sounds fun. " She smiled, and sat down beside me on the couch. " Tired?"

    " A little bit. " I said, yawning simultaneously. I gave a small laugh and my mom smoothed back my curly hair. I glanced over at the television, seeing she was watching a taped episode of Oprah. 

     " Yeah, I think I'm going to head up to my room and get some shut eye. " I said, pushing myself up off the couch. 

     " Goodnight, honey. " Mom said, curling back up on the couch and watched me go upstairs to a room that I had missed sleeping in, dearly. 

     It had taken all but a week after starting the medicine to get back in my own bedroom. It was still practically sterilized, but the privacy was good. The walls were still white, as was the carpet, and the shelves were plastic and filled with random knick- knacks and jewelry. A calendar of my favorite band hung on the closet door and my vanity dresser was lined up with make-up I hadn't put on in a long time. 

     I wriggled out of my jeans, let them fall to the floor, and slipped under the blankets of my bed. I stared at the ceiling, seeing the glow in the dark stars plastered everywhere. I took in deep breaths, trying to calm my stuttering heart, still excited from tonight. It may have been normal for any other seventeen-year-old girl, but for me it was new and exciting and different from the norm; the norm being hospital beds and handfuls of medication. 

     I closed my eyes, oddly thinking of Jackson. I wasn't sure if I pitied him or if I was intrigued by him after hearing the rumors. He certainly seemed less intimidating outside of class than in it. I drifted to sleep, hoping things were finally falling into place.