Sent by xLemur.
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Me: Sup
Friend: OMG IM AT THE PARK AND THERES A GIANT GHOST CHASING ME AROUND HELP ITS GOING TO BITE ME
Me: Wtf? Are you drunk?
Friend: NO I MEANT GOOSE PLEASE HELP
Me: Lol you're pathetic
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Mom: What kind of crap do you want for your birthday? Chocolate?
Son: I asked for cake, but I suppose poop works too...
Mom: OH MY GOSH sorry honey I meant cake
Son: Yeah... I'm not so interested in chocolate anymore
