Reign of the World

Chapter 22

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Rose woke up warm, and at first that was all she could remember.  But as more of what had happened that day set in, she relaxed, keeping herself calm.  Night was still upon them, and if the Doctor's flare had attracted anyone, they weren't here yet.

She blinked a few times, adjusting to the darkness, and saw Tiffany sitting on the edge of the shelter, hunched over and looking nothing short of defeated.  If Rose was honest, she knew she'd been sort of cruel to Tiffany, even if she deserved it.  She knew her mother wouldn't be very pleased if she knew what she'd done. 

No matter how she tried to justify the words she'd said to Tiffany about the Doctor's choice and whatnot, Rose had to admit that she felt she'd been a little harsh on the girl.  Was there a sort of feminine pride that crept up when it came to the fact that the Doctor had chosen her?  Of course, but that didn't mean she needed to gloat.

She could practically feel Jackie Tyler's glare from an Earth that wasn't quite so new.

Sighing, and feeling the weight of a guilty conscious, she started trying to pull out of the Doctor's embrace to talk to Tiffany, but felt his whine of disapproval rumble through her as he pulled her back, burying his face in the crook of her neck.  "Stay," he whispered, clutching her tighter. 

For some reason, he needed her here, and Rose was loath to refuse the Doctor anything, so she nodded and pushed back into him.  He nuzzled her neck in some sort of thanks and curled closer to her.  Forgetting that she wanted to speak with Tiffany, Rose fell easily back into a deep sleep.

The next time she woke up, it was still dark, but it was about in the moment before the dawn when it's rather dark and you can't tell if it's the middle of the night or not.  Tiffany was still in the position she'd been in a few hours previous, and the urge to say something to her returned, and she started slowly pulling out of the Doctor's arms.  He grunted in disagreement, but she shushed him quietly and turned to face him.

"Just a minute, yeah?" She whispered.

He reached out a hand and cupped her face gently. "Don't wander off," he said quietly, his voice gruff with sleep.  Her lip twitched and she nodded.  He returned her smile and his eyes drifted shut again.

She moved slowly around the shelter to where Tiffany was sitting and sat next to her, saying nothing for a few moments.  Then she heaved a heavy sigh and blurted it out.  "I'm sorry."

Tiffany turned to Rose, confusion written on her face.  "What?"

"I'm sorry," Rose repeated, and waved her hand vaguely.  "For what happened, you know?"

Tiffany raised her eyebrows.  "You've got to be kidding.  You're sorry?"

Rose fidgeted a bit, feeling a little uncomfortable.  Couldn't she just accept the apology and move on?  She could be sleeping right now if she wasn't feeling guilty.  "Yeah," she nodded.  "I'm apologizing to you, I know I wasn't exactly... Kind."

She heard Tiffany inhale rather violently through her nose and shift around where she was sitting.  "If either of us should be apologizing, Rose, I'm afraid it's me.  I've been thinking a lot about what happened, back on that ship with the Daleks."

Rose leaned her elbow on her knee and her cheek in her hand, her face turned toward Tiffany in a listening gesture.  "I think we all have."

Tiffany shook her head.  "No, I... I threw myself at Doctor Smith, I thought he was just, you know, repressed, and he needed somebody like me.  I knew he loved you, anybody could see it, but I just wanted him for myself, regardless of his own feelings.  Figured I could tempt him.  But then he just... He kissed you, right in front of me, and it hit me, what I was doing."

"You..."

"I kissed him," Tiffany finished bitterly.  "I knew I wasn't what he wanted, and I did it anyway."  She leaned her head in her hands and Rose lifted her hand to rub her back.  Tiffany sighed heavily and lifted her head again.  "Since I've been Mr. Kelly's assistant, I've not had time for anything.  Friends, boyfriends, nothing.  And I guess I was lonely."

"Mr. Kelly's pretty young," Rose nudged the other girl's shoulder, deciding to forgive her kissing the Doctor, because really, who hadn't kissed the Doctor?  Besides, it seemed like there was more on her plate than just that.

Tiffany let out a forced laugh.  "Yeah, but he treats me like an assistant, you know, like I'm not an equal.  Like I'm not a clever scientist on my own, like I didn't go to school for eight years to study and be a scientist.  And I guess I saw the way the Doctor treated you, like you were... Like you were almost better than him.  And I wanted that."

Rose nodded, understanding.  "You know, where I come from, we've got these things called A-levels.  And they're massively important for gettin' good jobs and stuff, going to university.  I never got my A-levels, cause I moved in with this guy I thought was everything.  I had a dead-end job, was probably gonna live and die on the same flat.  But when I met the Doctor, it wasn't that he taught me who I was.  But he made the universe open enough for me to see it."

She waited for a moment, letting that set in with Tiffany, before saying quietly, "And sometimes you've got to show yourself.  Maybe that's what you're looking for.  Once we get off this island, go be a scientist, do amazing things."

Rose turned to look at Tiffany, and saw that she was crying.  She opened her mouth to apologize, but Tiffany held up a hand, stopping her.  "Don't say you're sorry.  It's just that you're right. I need to quit being an assistant and do what I trained to do."  She lifted a shoulder.  "And maybe find someone.  Not be so lonely."

The silence that fell should've been uncomfortable, but somehow it wasn't, as Tiffany regained herself and finished what she wanted to say, obviously determined to get this all out in one shot, to let it go.  To be free of it.

"You're not even obligated to be nice to me, I was horrible to you."

Rose smiled.  "I learned a long time ago that somebody not being nice to you is not a reason to be the same to them."

Tiffany looked shocked at this, and turned to face Rose, wiping her face of tears.  "You mean that.  You're not just saying it, I can tell."

Rose nodded and hugged the other girl, who hesitated for a moment before hugging Rose back.  And Rose realized it wasn't guilt she'd been feeling about Tiffany, it was sympathy.  Tiffany was almost a carbon copy of what Rose had been like when she was with Jimmy Stone.  And then there had been light, and her whole world had changed, and she wasn't that naïve little girl any more. 

And the sun was rising for Tiffany as well.