Falling

Chapter Twelve

"Bye Charlie!"

"Bye, Drew, have fun at karate class!" I tell little Drew as he shuts the passenger seat door. Am I a bad person to let a seven year old sit shotgun? Gee, I hope not. I watch Drew waddle into the small building where his karate class is held. When I see him go inside I put my dad's SUV into drive and head home.

I hit a stop light. It was one of those abnormally long stop lights that for some reason take longer than usual to turn green. Usually it happens when you are in a hurry, or it smells, or you are just in a bad mood. This time it was because I didn't have anything else on my mind except for a bipolar Nate. One minute he's kissing me and the next it's like I repulse him. Like he can't even be near me. What was up with that? I was trying my hardest for the past forty-eight hours to distract myself, to think of anything besides Nate. But of course this stop light has to take an eternity to turn green.

My phone rings as I am still waiting for the light to change. It was Alice. I had been "unintentionally" ignoring her. I know she doesn't like Nate. For reasons unknown except for the fact that he... get's around. I know she probably realizes I'm ignoring her, so I take deep breath and answer my phone.

"Hello?" I say into the phone, hesitantly.

"Have you been ignoring me?" She asks, sounding like she had one too many red bulls. The light finally turned green.

"Of course not," I lie. "Why would I do that?"

"Oh I don't know, maybe because you've been spending an unhealthy amount of time with Tabor." I can hear the shrillness in her voice.

"I don't see what the big deal is," I shrug. I didn't know what Alice had against Nate.

"So it's true!"

"How did you even hear that?" I ask Alice.

"Riis told me. He has a really big mouth I wouldn't tell him anything if I were you. And it doesn't take a genius to figure out why you skipped class the other day."

"How did Riis know anything?"

"Nate told him." Alice answers, sharply. "He was bragging about how easy you were to get." She concludes in a softer more genuine tone. Nate wouldn't really brag about me, would he? He wasn't that much of a jerk. Or was he? He did after all lead me on, dancing with him and then just leave out of the blue like that.

"He said that?" I ask, quietly. I can hear Alice sigh on the other line.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. It's just," She pauses a moment before continuing. "Why don't you come over? We can rent a movie or something."

"No, I can't. Sorry... I have to... Um... Go." I stammer and quickly hang up the phone.

What was Nate doing? Was I just another girl to him? All we did was kiss. Once. For ten seconds. Was he telling people different? Who had he even told? He had made me feel good when all I wanted to do was cry. Was that all part of the plan? What was the point of the kiss? Just to make sure I was falling for him? I needed to talk with him. There was no way in hell I was going to be just another one if his playthings. I'm not some bimbo he can toss around.

Before I even knew what I was doing, just before turning into my neighborhood, I make a sudden U-turn. I had to see Nate. I needed to know what he was doing. I headed to his house.

As I drive closer and closer to my destination, I was regretting my decision. I didn't know what I was going to say, or how I was going to say it. All I knew is Nate needed to hear it. Whatever "it" was. I turned onto his street. I parked my car and walked up to the front door, praying my words would come to me in the moment. I take a deep breath and pound on the door.

I hear the sound of Angel's barking and a few seconds later see the door open. It opens to a face that I wasn't expecting. The face was Mathew. He seems to be wearing the exact same clothes I see him in when we met. He puts his hands in his overall pockets.

"Charlotte? Right?" He questions.

"Right. Well, I prefer Charlie." I tell him. He nods in understanding.

"Well Charlie, what can I do you for?"

"Uh- is Nate here?" I ask. Mathew shakes his head.

"He went out." He responds vaguely. Of course he's not here. Before I can reply to Mathew, he continues to speak. "Why don't you come in?" He offers. Mathew gestures me to come in but I shake my head.

"Oh... I uh-"

"It'll only be for a second." He tells me. I sigh.

"Okay, why not?" I do as I am told and walk inside the house. Mathew and I walk up the stairs to the kitchen. He tells me to take a seat and make my self comfortable. So I do, at least the "take a seat" part. He offers me water and I allow it. He sits across the old wooden kitchen table from me.

"So what did my grandson do now?" Mathew asks. I try to hide my smile.

"How did you know he did something?" I ponder. Mathew laughs at that and shakes his head.

"Because I was once his age and acted just like him." He takes a sip of his own glass of water, wipes his white mustache with his thumb and index finger, and shrugs. "Boys like us are famous for doing stupid things."

Mathew takes a yellow notepad and writes something on to it, then hands it to me. "Here's the address to where he is. Maybe you can talk some sense into him." Ha! That's likely. I smile and tell Mathew thank you as I begin to leave. Right when I am about to trot down the stair case, Mathew shouts from the kitchen table.

"Make sure to go easy on him." Mathew shrugs, "we do learn eventually." I smile, in understanding and turn to walk down the stairs.

The paper with the address on it, had directions on it also. I follow the directions through town, the paper leads me to a grove of trees. Just beyond the trees is a cemetery. I double check the address and look at the address on the cemetery sign. The sign had in a curvaceous font "Bellingham Cemetery" written on it along with the same address that was on the yellow sheet of paper. I park the car.

It was a small cemetery. So after about ten minutes of searching through the green grassed grave yard I found Nate. I come up from behind him. He is sitting against a headstone. I try to be quiet but I accidentally step on a twig. The twig cracks in half and it startles Nate, making him jump and turn around. His eyes scan me. His expression shows a sign of embarrassment and vulnerability, like he was caught doing something he shouldn't be.

"What, what are you doing here?" He puzzles, not being able to come up with the answer himself. His eyes were glassy, but he wasn't crying. I come to the face of the headstone so Nate didn't have to turn around. The headstone said; Sarah Tabor-- A loving sister-- A fighter-- April 11, 1998- November 25, 2010.

We were at his sister's grave. His sister was dead and I was at her grave. I couldn't yell at Nate right here. No matter how mad I was. I look down at the grass, so I don't have to look at Nate.

"I needed to talk to you." Is all I say. Nate nods solemnly. If his sister was here, where was his parents? I sit down next to him, but I don't say anything.

"She was twelve." He says. I cock my head so I can see him. Nate was looking off somewhere far away. "She was diagnosed with leukemia when she was nine. Can you believe that?" Now he looks at me. "Nine years old." His voice cracks and I can't look at him anymore. He sounds like a small boy. He began to shake a little, so I put a hand on his shoulder softly. I remember than I'm mad at him but then I realize that, that didn't matter, I still care about Nate, so I keep the hand there to try to comfort him. "She stopped responding to treatments at eleven. She couldn't stay on life support forever..." He continues. "Sometimes I come here to talk to her. Isn't that crazy?" Nate laughs. I rub his shoulder.

"No, no that's not crazy at all." I tell him, choking on my words. He stops looking at me and returns to the place far away.

"It's a familial disease. Sarah got it from my mom." Hearing him talk about this makes me tear up. It reminds me of my own mother. I'm not as strong as Nate is. Crystal tears start to roll down my face. "Did you know chemotherapy causes a person to lose neurons in the cerebral cortex?" Nate makes a gesture to his brain to help describe what he is talking about. "Which causes a person to receive early onset Alzheimer's? I did." Nate concludes.

"What do you mean?" I stutter, not knowing what else to say. Did his sister have Alzheimer's as well as Leukemia? Nate looks at me.

"My mom," he clears his throat. "She has Alzheimer's. I haven't seen her since I was fourteen when Sarah died. She lives in some residential care home." He waves off the comment like it didn't matter.

"Why haven't you seen her?" I whisper. Nate shrugs.

"My grandparents won't let me. She's forgotten me and they don't want me to see her like that. They want my memory of her to stay 'pure'. They won't even tell me what home she is in, they don't trust I won't go by myself."

"What about your dad?"

"My dad's the one who put her in the home. He left me with my grandparents. He doesn't matter." Nate says, throwing a rock at nothing in particular. He stands up and puts his hand out to me to help me up. "Come on, I'm done here." I nod hesitantly and take his hand to stand up.

We walk quietly through the cemetery. "So what did you need to talk to me about, freckles?" Nate asks in a much more easy tone, his hands in his pockets. I am amazed at how quickly he can come back from such vulnerability. I still had tears in my eyes.

"It was nothing," I answer vaguely with a sigh.

"Right. Nothing. That's why you tracked me down to a cemetery of all places." Nate scoffs. He was getting far too good at reading me. This wasn't the time to yell at him.

"It's not the time to talk about it." I shrug. This makes Nate stop and face me.

"Why? Because you found out I have a dead sister? No, you are talking right now." He replies, sternly. I sigh and glare at him, intensely.

"You wanna know what I needed to tell you? Really? Well here it is. What the hell is wrong with you, huh? Do you really have to flirt with every girl that walks passed you? Are you that deranged?" I start to raise my voice. Nate's expression shows that he is surprised. I continue my rant. "Why do you have to lead me on like you actually liked me? Why did you have to kiss me? Dance with me? Why? And then you went and bragged to people about 'how easy I was'?" He tries to speak, confusion written all over his face, but I'm not finished. "I'm not about to be some girl that you can just play with! I'm just not! So if you have any explanation, I'm all ears. But if you just wanted to hurt me. That's not going to happen, you got that?" When I'm done I take a deep breath and wait for his response. When Nate doesn't speak I turn towards where my car is and start walking. Before I get to far Nate grabs hold of my arm, making me stop.

"Wait," he pleads. His voice is gentle and calm. "Who said I was bragging?" I jerk my arm so it's not in his grasp anymore and sigh.

"Alice said you were talking to Riis about me." I respond. I match his gentle tone.

"I was talking to Riis about you. But not like that."

"Then like what?" I ask. Nate shakes his head.

"It doesn't matter, okay?" He tells me. He tries to put his hand on my cheek, but I move out of his way.

"No. No, that's not okay. I'm not going to just going to sit back and listen to vague reasonings." I turn back around and start to walk again.

"Charlie!" I hear Nate whine from behind me. I don't even hesitate to continue to walk. Again, Nate grabs me turning me around. Before I can push him off of me he places his hands on my hips, locking me in place, and he kisses me.

I want to pull away as soon as it happens but my body won't let me. My lips were enjoying the feel of his too much. I step closer to him to deepen the kiss and I wrap my arms around his neck. I don't want it to stop. His lips caressed mine perfectly. It felt so right. But it had to stop.

I break the kiss and back up a little ways, so we aren't so close anymore. My hands are resting on Nate's shoulders now an his hands were still glued to my hips. I don't look at him but I can feel him staring at me.

"I should've done that the other night, when we were dancing." He whispers. I feel his heavy breath.

"Why didn't you?" I mumble.

"Because I'm an idiot." He admits. I pop my head up and give him an incredulous glare. our bodies weren't touching anymore but we were still very close. "And because... I don't know- I was... Afraid, I guess." I look at him confused. Afraid of what? "That's all I'm gonna give you, Freckles." He says flatly. "You need a ride?" Nate asks, changing the subject.

"I got one." I reply, gesturing to the SUV behind me. Nate nods his head in understanding.

"Right," he says. He bites the inside of his cheek contemplating something in his mind. His eyebrows squish together. "See ya later, Charlie."



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•Author's Note•



Ta-da! Here it is everyone! Hope you like it! Sorry it took so long to update I had a very busy week. It was all pretty hectic, but better late then never, right?

Anyways, how did you like this chapter? Please fan, vote, and especially comment! I feel like a broken record but it seriously is t favorite when you guys give me feedback. Even if it's not all good feedback.

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