Living in Dead Memories

Chapter 1 (uneditied)

Living in Dead Memories

Chapter 1

The rain was cold on my face and cool January air whipped through my hair. A new year meant new possibilities, new opportunities, and a new year without Tristan. I pulled up my hood as I took off the Christmas flowers from Tristan's grave and replacing them with purple lilies and red roses. Shivering, I set the old flowers down and wrapped my arms around myself.

Tristan was the most amazing guy in the world. I was utterly in love with him. Everyday felt like a fairytale, a dream come true, a wish upon a star, or whatever you want to call it. Sadly, my fairytale didn't get a happily ever after. Tristan was diagnosed with Leukemia, which is cancer of the blood. I stayed with him every moment I could watching as he got sicker and sicker. I tried my best to never cry, to stay strong. He was the one that needed to be comforted, not me. I did my best at being his shoulder to cry one for a change, but he only cried a very few times after he realized he wasn't going to survive. Seeing him so broken tore me apart, but seeing him laying on the hospital bed just days, hours, minutes from passing away still haunted me every minute of my life.

His face still showed every time I closed my eyes. My hands wrapped instantly around the charm of the necklace he gave me just minutes before he died. Water ran down my face, but I couldn't be sure which drops were tears and which drops were just from the rain.

I was soaked now and knew I needed to make my way home before somebody started to worry. Dreading the thought of leaving the closet thing I had to being with Tristan I whispered goodbye and walked to my car. Getting in and starting the car felt, itself, like it took forever. I sat in the car and stared out the window for a while trying not to think. I started to zone out when I heard our song start to play on the radio. I sat back and watched the rain as our song filled the car and my mind with memories.

Tristan laughed. He was laying in the passenger seat with the seat all the way back and one of those pieces of gum that come in a fake cigarette box in his mouth. He blew out a puff of dust from the gum then took it out of his mouth as if he was actually smoking.

"Your such a dork." He teased.

I pouted but had no idea how to comment. Instead I just watched him tear the paper off of the stick on gum and pop it into his mouth. After he was chewed the gum enough for it to go from a hard long stick to a soft chewy blob he leaned over and kissed me.

"You're my sexy dork though Anessa."

I felt my face get warm as I tried to hide a smile. He was the dork, not me. He stuck his gum to a piece of paper and pulled me out of my seat and into the back. I laughed as he attempted to crawl back without falling. It was of course a huge fail and he fell right to the floor.

He got up and hovered, just barely, above me. He kissed me and slide a hand to the small of my back. I nearly ripped off his shirt in my haste to go farther. I ran a my hands down his chest and to his back. I looked into his emerald eyes that always found a way to amaze me. I tried to pull away when I noticed smething dark in the corner of my eye.

I looked over to see a few purplish and red spots on his back and a few on his arm.

"What happened?" I asked, alarmed.

He sat up, confused. "Huh?"

He looked at his arm then realized what I was talking about. He touched them a few times as if trying to figure out exactly what they were.

"Whoa. Uhh, I guess It's just a few bruises or something? I probably got them from running into something, or maybe from that fight a few days ago. It's nothing babe." He assured me.

The song ended and the other song was half over before I realized I'd been sitting in the car for a while. I started to drive home but the rain got worse and worse. Being forced to pull over, I turned on my heat and closed my eyes trying to get warmer. I was freezing and couldn't stand it. I looked in the back and found Tristan's jacket. Tears stung my eyes as I grabbed it and slipped it on over my own jacket.

I closed my eyes and listened to the radio. A loud knock on my window made me jump. A strange man in a black jacket and dark jeans stared at me through the window. I wasn't quite sure what to make of it, so I simply rolled down my window to look at him better. The rain immediately began to rush in.

"What do you want?" I demanded.

"You," He answered in a chilling, low voice.

Before I could react he had my door open and pulled me out and to the other side of my car where nobody would see me. I tried to scream but he quickly shoved something into my mouth and taped it so I couldn't talk. I gagged against the object in my mouth but it refused to move. He pushed me onto the wet black top and took both off my jackets off. I shivered, fighting against the cold. The guy then ripped off my clothes and found my wallet. He set it aside then took off only his pants. Before he had the chance to do to much damage he was shoved off. I closed my eyes tight and listened to a struggle, a gagging noise, a yelp, and then silence.

I felt the tape on my mouth being removed slowly. Taking the chance, I sat up and sat out what was in my mouth. Once again it forced me to gag. A gentle hand went onto my back and rubbed it ever so lightly.

"Are you alright?" A farmiliar voice asked.

I couldn't believe it. It couldn't be him, it just couldn't be. It was impossible. I turned to look at the man behind me. His beautiful green eyes were filled with concern. Opening my mouth was all I could do for a few minutes. I had no idea how to react. After a while I finally forced myself to speak.

"Tristan?"