Emo boy x reader

Chapter 18

(Just to let you know there is going a trigger warning later on so look out for that)

*At school*

*Chris's P.O.V*

I was at my locker getting stuff for my next class.

"Hey loser." I sighed and turned around and saw one of the three guys. "Did your little girlfriend ditch you?"

"No." I said.

"She will soon. Don't think for a second that she loves you. She's just dating you because she pitys you because she knows that nobody will ever care about you." I looked down. It's not true none of it is true. She loves me and I love her. The bell rang signaling it was time for class. "Bye freak and remember it's all a lie." He walked away. I got my books and went to class. I couldn't get it out of my head the whole time.

*End of the day*

I went to (Y/N)'s locker to say goodbye. I grabbed her waist from behind.

"Hey beautiful." I whispered in ear.

"Hey handsome." She said and turned around.

"Do you want to come over later?"

"Sorry I can't my mom invited her boss over for dinner and I have to be there. Maybe some other time. Gotta go." She gave me a quick kiss and went with Damien to go home. I walked home and went to my room. The thing that he said won't leave my head. What if it's true?

"It can't be true we love each other." I mumbled to myself. I don't know why this thought stuck, out of all the other things why did this one stick?

*TRIGGER WARNING STARTING NOW*

I started to rub my wrists it felt like they were burning. (Does that happen to anyone else?) I moved my bracelets out of the way and stared at my old cuts. I've been 2 months clean. I wanted to cut so bad but I tried to stay strong.

"Don't think about it before you do something you'll regret." I whispered to myself. (Okay so my tablet won't let me put the italics so this ~ will be represent italics.)

~Do it you know you want to.~ A voice in my head said.

"No it's not worth it." I said.

~C'mon you know you want to. Remember the feeling of a razor running across your wrist, waist, and thighs.~

"I-it was w-wrong and I s-shouldn't have done t-that." I whispered and rubbed my wrists harder.

~The feeling was good though, it could take the stress and worry away.~  I just shook my head trying not to give in. ~Just one cut.~ Just one cut. I off my bracelets and walked into the bathroom that's connected to my room. I grabbed a old razor blade and just stared at it questioning if I should do it or not. ~C'mon kid do it.~ I nodded my head and ran the blade over wrists again and again. I ended up doing five cuts on each wrist. I sat on the ground and cried. I never wanted to return to my old habits. I cleaned up my wrists, the floor, and finally the razor. I hid it in my cabinet.

*TRIGGER WARNING OVER*

"Chris come down to eat!"

"I'm coming!" I put on my bracelets and went downstairs. I can't let anyone know about what just happened.