I Need You

Part 22 - Take Good Care of My Baby

        ** George

           I missed her.  I missed her more than I loved her, which was absolutely MAD, because I loved her more than anything.   I knew she was with Paul..   I'd heard the whispers, I'd seen the pitied looks they'd cast in my direction, but I wasn't angry with her.   I knew she didn't really love him, not the way she loved me.  Or, the way she once loved me,  anyway. Paul would break her heart, no doubt about that.  And while I'd never want her to be hurt, at least I could try to make a play for her once again if she'd even have me.

        I never wanted to leave her, to make her cry, or question what she did to make me go. I knew she felt like that. I knew her better than anyone, aside from John. I wanted to call her, every day, tell her why I had to go.  I don't think she'd believe me. And if she did,  I wouldn't want her to lose any more than she already had. I should confide in John, maybe he'd believe me. He knew I didn't lie,  especially not to his beloved sister.  I was nervous, though. Actually,  I was fucking terrified.  I wouldn't want to cross John in the first place, but when it involved a devastated Jeannie,  I might as well have signed my death warrant.  

        Practises were always difficult,  not wanting to face Paul, and his smug little grin, knowing he had my girl.  Fucking prissy tosser, girly looking bitch. John jokingly called him princess, ha. I loved that about him. He called it as he saw it.
           I did what I was supposed to do,  played my little part, plunking away at the guitar, even though my heart certainly wasn't in it. I'd go home every night,  wallowing in self-pity, hating myself for letting her go. It was starting to eat me alive, and I knew I had to tell SOMEONE,  get it out of my head,  clear my mind.  Maybe I could start to heal.. Or maybe frogs would fly out of my arse. I was obviously deluding myself.  One night at practise, Cyn had apparently taken notice of my sunken demeanor.  She'd always cared about my well-being since the beginning. She'd always looked after me. She was a natural motherly type.

         "George, you alright? You've been off for a while now, and I'm concerned about you.  If you miss Jeannie that much and are this miserable,  then CALL HER. You're smarter than that."

       "I can't, though. She's with McCartney now," I said with a bitter tone.
       "So? We both know he's a cad George.  You act as if they're getting married. DO SOMETHING."

        "Well, you lot, I'm off. Got a romantic evening planned, and I can't be late! I'll see you all tomorrow?"    Paul shot John a knowing look, letting him know Jeannie was in capable hands. John nodded, and left for the last bus. Cyn pulled me aside before joining John outside.

       "You have to talk to her, and soon. Before Paul ditches her for someone else,  which we BOTH know is going to happen sooner rather than later."
        "Cyn, she'll be with him tonight. He was just bragging about this special romantic evening he has planned. He's on his way to hers right now."
       "No, he isn't.  She's meeting me at mine. We're having a girls' night in."
           "Well then, if he's not going to be with Jeannie,  who's he going to see?"      
        
        Cyn's face grew angry, which didn't happen very often,  and my heart was in my throat.  How could he?!  How could he hurt her like that?!  I had overheard John say that the past few nights, Paul hadn't turned up at her flat like he usually did.  He'd see her the following morning,  and John just figured he was working on music. Jeannie would go to bed alone, worried about that git, but greet him with kisses the very next day.  Cyn was right. I had to do something,  and it had to be now..

         I thought I'd try to catch up with Cyn and John before they had gone too far. I wasn't nearly brave enough to tell Jeannie to her face, and I certainly didn't want to see her heart get shattered right in front of my eyes. I was going to talk to John.

          "Oi, John! Can I have a minute?"    He sidled up to me, a quizzical look on his face.
          "What's goin' on then, Haz? Is umm, is this about Willy?"
         "Yeah. Ummmm, she's alone right now,  and if I keep these things to myself any longer,   it's going eat me alive. It's bad enough she's going to be hurt either way."
         "Go on then."

         "She's meeting with Cyn tonight."
         "I know that, you daft monkey, Cyn's been talking about it nonstop. What's your point?"
         "Paul said he had to be goin', had a date or summat planned."
         "And? YOU broke up with her George, that's on you. She's with Paul now,  and you have to come to grips with it."
        "John. Think about it.  If Jeannie has plans with Cynthia,  then SHE'S not having a date with Paul. He's two-timing your sister. And you should know,  that I didn't break up with her because I WANTED to.."
       "Ok. So.. Paul's a dead man. But before I take care of him, what are you getting at with why you ended things with Wils?"

        I took a deep breath, this wasn't going to be easy, and certainly not pleasant.
         "It's no secret that your Auntie doesn't like me,  John. No matter what I did,  or how much arse I kissed, she hated me."
       "I uh, I know. And I'm sorry she was so awful to you. It upset Willy too. But I'm still not understanding all this, Haz."
       "Let me finish. When Jeannie was in hospital having her operation,  my mum and I were always there. Waiting for her to come back,  wanting to see her, take care of her. Mimi basically blamed everythin' on me. All the bad shite that happened to Jeannie, including her attack, issues you have had, and then she started on mum, gettin' in her face.   John, Mimi called my house all the time,  hollerin' at mum about how I was a degenerate, and that I was ruinin' both your and her lives. She said that you personally wanted to beat me within an inch of me life,  and that I would deserve it. She also said Jeannie moved out of ours because she had a thing with Macca the entire time.  I know now that she didn't, and that if you truly hated me and wanted to beat me senseless,  you would have done it by now."

        John was speechless.
         "MIMI said all this? Really?!" He looked hurt, and then absolutely ENRAGED.

         "I understand if you don't believe me  John, I do, but if you don't,  just ask mum. She got the phone calls, everything. Mimi never thought I was good enough for her, and I agree, but I would never willingly let her go John. I've been sick without her. Even if I can't get her back,  she deserves to know the truth about Paul."

      "So why, then? Even if you weren't sure about me kicking your arse, why just let her go?"

      "Your dad left when she was born. Your uncle George died when you were both very young,  then you lost yer Mum. I didn't want to be the reason she lost Mimi too. And losing you, John? She'd never last. I did this for her. But I can't hide it anymore.  Tell her. Tell her before she goes mad with worry over Princess; before I break down at her door and cause her any more pain."

       John nodded as I turned to go. No, she wouldn't be back in my arms tonight. Maybe she never would be again, I didn't know for sure.  But at least John would let her down gently,  before she caught Paul with her own eyes. Unfortunately for her, that would happen anyway. .