Fragments

Heaven and back

TW: Mentions of drug usage and depression 

I took inspiration for this from the lyrics of the song 'Heaven and back' by Chase Atlantic

She lived life on the edge. She thrived on the thrill, the rush of defying expectations. Danger was a dance partner, leading her down dark alleys and late-night adventures. She wasn't afraid to take chances, even if they were reckless.

One night, she fell in with a group of women who led her into a world of ecstatic oblivion, fueled by pills that promised escape from the pain of reality. The initial rush lifted her spirit, painting the world in vibrant hues. She felt invincible, a goddess soaring amongst the clouds. But the euphoria was fleeting, replaced by a sharp descent. Tears welled up, blurring the edges of her vision as the world plunged into darkness. In that moment, she had touched an ephemeral heaven, only to be dragged back to the harsh realities of her choices.

This cycle became her life. Days blurred into nights, filled with fleeting moments of exhilaration followed by the crushing weight of withdrawal. Trapped in a gilded cage of her own making, she desperately craved release, injecting a new drug, a new hope, into her veins. Each time, the ascent was exhilarating, the descent terrifying.

One night, the descent took a darker turn. The emptiness of her life pressed down on her, suffocating. The room became a prison, the walls closing in. Fear, raw and primal, seized her. The lies she told herself, the facade of bravado, crumbled, revealing the truth: she was terrified. The world turned black, her heart a frantic drumbeat against the silence.

In that moment of utter despair, a flicker of hope remained. A voice, a memory, perhaps her own, whispered of a life beyond the darkness. A life without the highs and lows, the thrilling dangers and the crushing emptiness. A life where she wouldn't have to keep going to heaven and back, only to fall further each time. With a choked sob, she wished she could take it all back, to find a way out of the obsidian cage she had built for herself. But for now, she was left with the echo of her own lie: "I'm fine." As darkness consumed her, the only sound was the faint echo of her own cry for help.