CONSUME

15.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

It had rained all day, the smell of firewood and cooking filling the cabin as the sound of the rain against the windows drowned out any other sound. Graham stood with his back to her, his attention on the kitchen as her boredom had lead her to sit before the TV with a thousand piece puzzle before her.

The puzzle was of a bridge and she wondered why he couldn't have picked a garden or a puzzle that pictured cats.

The dark pieces blending into the dark wood of the coffee table, frustration beginning to build in her chest as she couldn't find the piece she was looking for.

"If the storm continues like this, the electricity might go out tonight." Graham spoke, glancing over his shoulder at her.

He seemed content.

He was dressed in a t-shirt and dark sweatpants, signaling that he would be home all day.

They had been civil.

She had done her best to be nice all morning.

"Okay." She nodded.

She hated the dark. Apprehension filled her chest with the thought of being stuck in the dark all alone. He seemed to be aware of her dread as he glanced at her again, an analyzing look to his serious face.

"I've never been able to figure out why you're scared of the dark. I know everything about you except that." He spoke, his voice humored as if he didn't understand how odd the words were.

"I'm not scared of the dark." She spoke surly.

He seemed to stifle back a laughter.

He placed two plates on the coffee table, sitting down on the couch all too close to her for her comfort. She didn't want to touch him, she certainly didn't want to kiss him again.

"I apologize for yesterday." He suddenly spoke.

The argument they had felt like it had happened over and over and while it was yesterday, it felt like it had gone on for years. Everything had started to almost blur together, the events since the party felt like a nauseating dish she had eaten over and over until she became so sick she couldn't remember eating it.

That's what it all felt like.

A nauseating loop she couldn't escape.

"It's hard for me to let everything go." She spoke, pulling at the edge of her sweater.

"I know. But the second you do, it will be so easier. Don't you want that?"

She didn't know if he was telling the truth, or if he was attempting to manipulate her.

"Your friends weren't your friends. Your father left you. You have nothing but me and I'm here, swearing to give you everything you want," He took her hand in his, "We can start at a clean slate, I will take it however slow you want but I promise you that we will have a good life together."

She sat silent.

Was this her chance to make him think she could love him?

Arguing made the loop continue, thinking of her friends and her past made her hate herself, she had swore to herself to attempt to make him trust her.

She silently nodded, watching his dark eyes lit up as he began to smile.

"I know I did this the wrong way but you have the understand, you consume me, all I have done is out of love."

The letters flashed trough her mind, his long stares and his eagerness to be near her, even when she didn't know he was there.

She had never experienced love but she was sure this wasn't it, not to her, but to him it was. He was in love with her. The realization never really sunk in to her, the delirious rantings in his notebook insane enough to make her think he had no reasoning, but the person before her calm and collected and sane enough to think himself to be true.