Chapter 21

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by janello33

by janello33

Rachel had been watching Sean all day. She had bought little black dress that would be great for funerals and first dates. The funeral had been packed, as she expected, but had been waiting for the perfect time to approach him to express her condolences. The heat had turned her curled hair into beach waves and was hoping to catch Sean before her make up melted off.

She was sitting between her parents in the auditorium. "Great turn out," Teresa leaned over Rachel's plate to say to Bill. Bill nodded stirring his coffee. A hand came down on Teresa's shoulder. "Great job today," a woman in a navy pant and flowy blouse said. "Oh this was all Linda. She's in charge now." "Oh," the woman said surprised, "well I'm sure you were a great teacher." "Yes," Teresa agreed. "she was an apt student," happy to take some of the credit.

Rachel spotted a break in the people that seemed to be approaching Sean and family and pushed back her chair to excuse herself. "I'm just gonna go give Dottie and family my condolences," Rachel said as the lady in the navy trousers slid into her seat to continue a partial whisper conversation with Teresa. Nervously Rachel tucked and untucked her hair behind her ear.

The only person at the table was Randy, but he'd been there for quite a few minutes chatting with Sean at the end of the table. Rachel would start with Darren and his family, move on to Dottie and then she planned to extend her hand to Sean. She imagined squeezing his hand in here while she cupped the back of his hand with her left. The double hand would be just the right amount of intimacy. She had gone through all the scenarios in her head. The ideal would result in an embrace. She didn't think a hug was out of the question since they had basically grown up together. Rachel hoped that he'd like her perfume.

Halfway to the table she heard the scraping of a chair. Randy started to walk away from the table clearing the way for her, but much to her dismay Sean was standing up and walking away. Rachel stopped in her tracks to watch Sean walk out of the auditorium after Randy. "Of course he'd be going to the bathroom now," she said to herself. She almost retreated, but Dottie had already spotted her and was waiting for her to approach. "Damn it."

She got hugs from both Darren and his wife. "This is Noah and that is Brit," Darren said proudly. "Wow, they're so cute. They look just like your wife," she teased winking. That seemed to lighten the mood and talking about the kids extended her time at the table. "Thank you so much for coming. You're mom has been wonderful," Dottie said to Rachel. Rachel nodded. "I'm so sorry for your loss," she wished she could think of something more meaningful to say. She was sure that they were probably sick of hearing that line.

"It was such a blessing to see you that night in the hospital." Dottie's eyes were full of gratitude. "I'm glad I could be there," Rachel said and meant it. The conversation was coming to a natural end, but Sean hadn't come back yet. She didn't know how to extend the conversation without making it awkward and she now had people lined up behind her that were pushing her along. She gave Dottie a wave and headed back to her seat to park her butt between her parents.

Navy dress pants was still in her seat, so she thought it would be a great time to hit the bathroom herself. Maybe she'd run into Sean in the hallway. On her way out Janice almost ran into her with her scooter. "Watch out," Janice scolded like a woman in rush hour traffic. "Sorry, sorry," Rachel said sidestepping the scooter wondering if she felt any embarrassment about almost driving into Art's grave. Judging from the pile of food on Janice's plate she guessed the answer was 'no'.

The hallway was much cooler than the auditorium. She walked slowly by the men's washroom, but no Sean. Rachel didn't actually need to use the washroom. She was sure she had been sweating everything out in this heat, but she was pretty sure she could use some freshening up. Rachel looked as good as she was going to get. As she made her way back to the auditorium door she noticed right away that Sean's seat was still empty. She turned on her heel and decided to head outside to see if he was chatting with the smokers.

Pushing open the main doors, she smelled the smoke right away. She could hear Randy before she saw him. He had his audience and was taking full advantage of it. Sean was standing in the circle styrofoam cup in hand laughing along with the other smokers. He saw her right away and jutted his chin out at her to acknowledge her presence. Rachel took it as an invitation and joined the group.

"I think it's cooler out here than it is inside," she said to the group but she was looking directly at Sean. She recognized most people in the group. "Right!? I had to get out of there. It's suffocating," he pulled a drag off of his cigarette. "I never took you for a smoker," he said after exhaling. He sounded disappointed. "I'm not," she lied thinking about her secret backyard smokes. She made a mental note to quit asap.

Standing in the sun she listened to the group talk about crops, sports, weather and trucks. She hadn't realized it but she was now the only woman in the group. She hadn't even noticed them leave she had been so absorbed listening to the conversation about the last Blue Jays game. Ricky had strong opinions about every topic. Ricky tipped his cup tilted his head toward Sean. "Time for a refill?" Sean pulled a flask out of the inner pocket of his suit jacket. He poured Ricky a healthy few ounces into his cup before filling up his.

"Want some," he held the flask over her cup. "Oh no thanks," Rachel said waving the flask off. "Don't think my parents won't try and ground me if I got drunk at a funeral." Sean laughed, "Ya I wouldn't want to mess with Teresa either." Rachel looked down at her arms noticing that they were turning red from the sun. "I better get back inside," she said pointing at her arm, "I like the sun, but the sun doesn't like me." She turned to go. "I'll catch up with you in there," Sean called after her. "Sounds good," she said holding open to door. She slipped though the door and inside the church lobby her face turned a shade of red that was fit to match her arms.