BONUS - So You Wanna Be An Elf?

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Being one of Santa's elves is more than just a job

Just ask Bernard, Head Elf and Drill Sergeant extraordinaire, and Merry the Elf, Santa's Right Hand Elf and Head of Magic.

Once a year, Bernard and Merry assemble elves from around the elf world and put them through regulus training. The select few that make it to graduation, will go on to become part of Santa's team, a position steeped in tradition and honor. This is their training day!

Bernard and Merry present themselves to the selective group of elves ready for their training. The head elf stood tall with pride while the female elf smiled gracefully to the elves in training.
"You're all here for the same reason, to become one of Santa's little helpers" said Bernard
"But in order to do that, you'll have to go through us" said Merry, "So, what does it mean to be an elf?"
The female elf gazed at a young elf dressed in yellow and red, "What's your name, cadet?"
"Timothy, miss" said the young elf
"And what does being an elf mean to you?"
"We.. make toys?"
"That's right, we do" said Bernard, "But the meaning of the word is far greater than that. It represents a dream, a lifestyle, a passion, a purpose, a gift, a hope, a fellowship, a reason to live!"

The head elf noticed the look on Merry's face, telling him to relax so he wouldn't scare off the trainees. Bernard cleared his throat and allowed the female elf to speak.
"What Bernard is trying to say is, we don't just make toys" said Merry, "We make dreams come true"
"Precisely," said Bernard "We are dream merchants!"
The elves cheered, which made the two elves giggle at how excited they were.
"Alright, slow down, now, you're not quite there yet" said Merry
"Merry's right" said Bernard, "First, you're gonna have to pass a few tests. So, are you ready?"
"Sir, yes, sir!" said the trainee elves
"It's time to see what you're made of, you ready?"
"Sir, yes sir!!"
"Now that's more like it"

Each of the trainees were placed in different departments to see what kind of elf they'll be in Santa's workshop. Timothy was placed in the gift wrapping department, struggling to get the tinsel on just right. Bernard noticed this and couldn't help but test it with a rather passive aggressive smile on his face. But he remained calm, tossing the tinsel aside before telling the young cadet a story about an incident with Santa. Christmas Eve, around 1955, Keokuk in Iowa, Santa is making his way down a very dusty chimney, when CRASH, BOOM, ZING, KABOOM, a bow catches a rusty nail and rips off. Santa loses his footing and plummets all the way down the chimney and gets wedged between brick and cement, and can't move. The horrified look on Timothy's face showed that he knew something was wrong.
"Now, we don't want that to happen again, do we?" asked Bernard
Timothy shook his head vigorously
"So that's why it's got to be perfect. Let's try one more time"
"Sir, yes sir" said Timothy
Bernard winks at the trainee before giving him the proper instructions on how to assemble a present.

Meanwhile in the mailing department, Merry was monitoring the trainees sorting the letters sent to Santa from around the world. The female elf kindly takes one of the letters from a trainee's hand "Okay, what do we have here?" she asked before reading a letter out loud, " 'Cindy wants a dollhouse', Make 'em all the time, piece of cake, 'and her brother Billy wants a race car' Mass produced, no problemo"
Merry process to place the letter in a box with an image of Santa, meaning the elves could easily take care of it. She then moves on to the next letter, " 'Jack wants a Toy Story DVD' To infinity and Beyond!~" Merry giggled at her own Buzz Lightyear impression before placing it in the box with two images of Santa. It was then the female elf was stopped by a trainee elf, who looked rather confused by the letter to Santa. "Ma'am, this letter is from Cathy from Bakersfield, she wants a baby brother"
Merry couldn't help but giggle at the letter, "Well, this one is for the stork"  she said, placing the letter in a basket addressed to the stork.

Bernard and Merry meet after checking on each of the cadets, "I say the trainees are doing really well" said Merry
"I agree, Sugarplum" said Bernard, "With our team work, these elves will become part of Santa's team in no time"
It was then the two elves noticed something on the other side of the workshop. There, the trainees were watching what appears to be a reenactment of when Scott Calvin and Merry Calvin first arrived in the North Pole and Bernard telling them about the contract. The two present themselves to the trainees with confused yet curious looks on their faces. "What's going on here?" asked Bernard
"Oh, we're rehearsing" said a trainee, "We know you're gonna make more stories and movies, and you're gonna need elves"
Merry giggles, "You're just a tad star struck, aren't ya? You think making a story is easy? Well, when the writer of the story started making The Santa Clause fanfic, she thought it was gonna be a snap too. You know, watching the movie, get some inspiration, write a chapter or two, and go home. What's the big deal? Well I'll show you, look at all the work the writer went in to making this story"

When the writer got the idea of writing The Santa Clause Fanfic, it was sometime before Christmas Eve to Christmas Day. Sure it was a little late on the idea, but that didn't stop her from using some creative ideas into making a character, in other words me, Merry Calvin. The plot of course is the same as the original film The Santa Clause, released in 1994.
"Oh look at you, Bernard" said Merry in awe, "You were so cute and tiny"
"I wasn't that small" said Bernard, "But in the movie, most people called me 'One Take Berny' "
"It's true"
As for the film itself, Santa had to drop about 200 lbs in order to play his alter ego Scott Calvin in the movie. Do you know how hard it is to keep Santa away from the milk and cookies during those scenes? Santa just loves his dairy products. One tip, never act with reindeer. They show up, prance around, and chew up the scenery, sometimes they leave some reindeer chocolate. Trust me, I wouldn't if I were you. They may get Santa through the dark and foggy night, but we're the ones who make Santa look good on screen, plus they're very smelly. It's not all fame and fortune either to make a movie or a story, there's endless hours of sitting around, waiting for your close up, many takes over and over, it was endless. Even when it comes to writing, it can get pretty difficult when it comes to making certain scenes come to life. Saying goodbye to Charlie and my Mother Laura was a very emotional moment.
"It gets me every time" said Bernard, "Santa's really living his role now"
"Even mine" said Merry, "It all pays off"
From that day forth, Santa became a superstar, but Bernard and I certainly got the spotlight.

"So you see, movie making and writing stories takes desire, discipline, and dedication" said Bernard, "I can't wait for the next one"
"Same here" said Merry
It was finally time for the trainees' graduation, each one earning a diploma for each of their respective positions in Santa's workshop. Hey, maybe they might make it in a movie or story one day.
"Cadet Timothy!" said Bernard
"Sir, yes sir" said Timothy
"Welcome to Elf-hood"
"Sir, thank you sir"
"Is that all you ever say?"
"Sir, yes sir"
"I like it"
Merry smiled and shook her head, seeing the look on Bernard's face after Timothy left with his diploma.

"Cadet Molly" said Merry, presenting the diploma for the young female elf, "Congratulations on your work with Santa's mail. You're just the sort of elf we were looking for"
"Ma'am, thank you ma'am" said Molly, accepting the diploma.
"Cadet Jug" said Bernard with a smile, "Bravo, and if you're good enough, you might just make into one of our stories one day"
"Sir, thank you sir" said Jug
"Remember, there are no small parts, only small elves"
This concludes the training for all the elves selected to become part of Santa's team. Bernard and Merry congratulated the former trainees on becoming real elves. While the elves celebrated, Bernard and Merry walked arm in arm with smiles on their faces, proud of their work until next years training to become Santa's little helper.

A/N - I know the story is over, but I thought I throw in a little bonus story on how the story was made based on a special feature from The Santa Clause DVD. As for the sequel, I might be posting it earlier then expected, possibly around early February or so, just in time for Valentine's day. It's also quite fitting in a way since it's mostly on Santa finding a Mrs. Claus along with the relationship between Merry and Bernard

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