𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑲𝒊𝒅 & 𝑰 - A Billy the Kid western romance

Anguish

One pull of that trigger is enough to kill any man. It feels eerie to watch my brother hold it. He reads the sadness, disappointment, and panic on my face. There's no option left for him other than hauling up an explanation.

"Bucky got one for each of us, but it's only for protection. You know, with everything going on right now. Did you know people heard gunshots yesterday?" He begins.

I can feel anger creeping up behind me, ready to fill my body with its warmth. Firearms are not only dangerous, but also expensive. "Drop the act Milo, immediately. You know just as well as I do that Bucky can't afford a gun of his own, and certainly not four! Where did you get them?" I snap at him.

Bucky had lead the boys away out onto the fields, far away from town, alone. He took them on a long trip to a group of people by some housing and horse-pens, who had "given them the guns". I had no choice but to ask him for names. That's when his name echoed not only in my mind but this time, in the room. A shiver unlike any I have ever felt before swallows my body like a wave. A tsunami. It drowns me, and I can't breath. 

"Milo, gangs don't give gifts" I say slowly, as if I'm asking him whether he realises it. Milo isn't dumb. He knows who these people are just as well as I do.

He lowers his eyes to the floor. "I know" 

Every drop of anger was converted to sadness when the tsunamical worry struck me. 

"Milo, look at me" I cry out, my stress obvious. He doesn't.

"Milo. Look. At. Me" Tears begin flooding my eyes as I cup his face in my hands and lift it toward me. I don't want to say it. I feel like it will snake it's way into reality if I do, but it's already too late. His face is directed toward me but his eyes, our mother's eyes, are still looking through me down at the floor. Then he says it for me.

"We enlisted in a gang" He mumbles, and my heart breaks a thousand times over. My stomach churns at the thought that I have allowed this to happen after all. After fearing it so gravely, it still crawled its way out of my head and took on the shape of my brother. I wish mother had been here. If only she had still been alive, then none of this would have happened.

Milo is gang affiliated. Entangled in a mess that kills people in cold blood. Locked  in it, because one thing you should know about gangs, is that you don't leave them unscathed. Even if the other gang members miraculously don't shoot him, the townspeople, his people, certainly will if they find out. They will view him as nothing but a criminal. A traitor. They will wish so see him swing from the end of a rope. I snatch the revolver out of Milo's hands, and fetch father's old holster. Milo is with Billy the Kid's gang, and I need to get him out of it. I need to go see him, Billy. I will kill him if I have to, any opportunity thrown my way I will take.