CHAPTER ONE
*Crunch*
The blaring sounds of a wire bending crash exploded outside my quite apartment. The rumbling echoed through my room like an mk47 at a shooting range. This is what you get when you don't use a realtor, you end up living in a crappy apartment in the wrong side of town beside a 24 hour impounding yard.
"Living the dream." I mumbled yawning and raising my arms from under the cozy blankets. Rubbing my eyes, avoiding contact with the early mornings rising sun that shone through my cheap white blinds as I flipped over on my back.
Reshutting my eyes I shamefully remembered the mini bender I went on last night spending my weeks pay on pizza and imported beer well watching the full 3rd season of Seinfeld.
Pushing my fluffy white comforter from my boney shoulders I slumped my tired body over to the kitchen. I plucked my cherished bear shaped mug from towared dish infested the sink and contemplated whether I have the energy to wash it or not. Deciding that drinking out of a used cup wasn't the most risk taking event of my life's existent I turned to my frigne and glimpsed over at my answering machine. Planted beside it set 4 dollars in change and a worn out dirty sock that hadn't made its way to my 2 week old over flowing garbage can yet.
The change laying beside the sock was more then what I had even paid for the machine at my neighbors garage sale 3 years ago. I still wonder why they sold it, it works like a charm for the most part. It does occasionally slow down messages and makes people's voices sound like demons rising from the under world but, nobody's perfect so I can accept its baggage.
I shuffled my lighweight body over to my fringe, opening the door I admiared the pittyful remnits of the chilled box. Mustard, liqour, chinesse takeout boxes pilled on nearly every shelf, a full bottle of salted pickles, questionble lumby items wrapped in tinfole, 3 water bottles and a browning banana. I signed at my horrible shopping skills.
"Should I start the day off with a bit of a firey edge or a boring glass of water." I thought looking back and fornt at a plan ol' bottle of water and my tersured fireball whiskey I always kept in stock.
As exspected, I grabbed my favorite memory numer, took a swig and moved my sholders in a jazzy upper body dance motion chugging until the cinnamon bagan burning my throat.
"Whooooweeeee!" I histed at the burning sensation
After I had enough I threw the bottle back into the fridge for later. I looked over at my bear mug and thought some cold water sounded pretty good right now, not the best chaser and probably wouldn't help the burning tingle in my throat but who said I don't enjoy that fiery tingle.
I grabbed the thick plastic bear and stuck him under the tap. City water was awful but you get used to it, I already had a tingle in my throat anyways.
Lost in thought, I heard my television softly buzzing. Curiously, I peered into my cheaply furnisesd living room. The TV's picture lite up the dull area with the rainbow stripes of color bars. Sometimes my telivision does this,Though, its usally acompanyed by an irritatingly anonying beeping which I divinity didn't need to hear this early in the day. I mean, I did fish it out of a pile of junk at the inpound yard so what more could I ask for.
Before I could pull my hand from the sink I felt freezing cold water pouring down my right hand and through my fingers. I must have been deeply lost in my depressing life thoughts. I snapped out of my psyche and pulled my icy hand from the tap. Frigid water flopped from my over flowing cup spreading over the counter and my bare legs as I leaned in and switched off the faucet.
I was definitely awoken after the bitter freezing morning experience. Snatching a few pieces of paper towel from the roll and setting my soaked glass beside my highly piled dishes that strated over flowing on my countertop I began to rub down my water park of a kitchen. Well I was wiping the water puddles off the counter I heard a familiar beeping. It was my trusty answering machine telling me I had messages.
