every man gets his wish

jealous girl

the party you were attending wasn't all that boring, but you obviously didn't know everyone. you and alex were invited by miles, one of your closest friends, on an occasion before christmas.

what you thought was one of the, perhaps most enticing parties of your life, soon turned into a slow nightmare.

you knew when charm alex had, and of course it had hit you, too. alex could have all the girls at his feet, and you knew it.

you dispersed into the crowd, when he went to say hello to a couple of his friends and you stayed to have your drink in the corner of the living room, not that you minded, but you didn't particularly enjoy social interactions.

when you then went looking for him after about ten minutes, you saw him and saw him with a couple of girls around, and you felt an emptiness inside.
you couldn't help yourself.

you weren't exactly the jealous type, so much less of his exes - who were the sweetest people in the world actually - but that situation was stranger for you.
she was tall, blond, and really skinny, looking like his ideal girlfriend, and that probably made you feel worse.

you sighed, then downed your drink in one gulp and immediately the familiar feeling of heaviness hit you.

your eyes slid to him again, the two girls - the other had red, curly hair, and a body with killer curves - laughed and touched his body.
you felt bad, but really bad.

you made your way down the hallway, couldn't look at that scene anymore, climbed the stairs, and finally reached the door to miles studio, where you had spent so much time while he and alex were composing.

you closed the door behind you and let go a sigh. "fuck" you whispered, slid down the door until you were sitting on the floor and then ran a hand through your hair.

after a few minutes even the air in the room was getting stuffy, you got up, opened the window and pulled a cigarette out of your bag.

you quietly had permission to smoke in miles's study, because the three of you did it a better of times, and even smoked something more thought out, like weed.

you then tossed the cigarette into the ash tray and sat down on the soft couch. you didn't know what the situation was like downstairs, but you were almost afraid to see it, so you didn't move.

you didn't know how much time had passed, but at two o'clock dawn, you looked up at the clock and saw that it was already late.

you got up and closed the window, then left the room. you passed among drunk people and headed for the kitchen, grabbed a glass and filled it with water.

you stiffened when someone wrapped their arms around your waist, but then you recognized alex's strong scent.

"my dear" he said to greet you, then placed a kiss on your neck, usually it would have caused chills, but not this time.

"hey" you whispered, you knew your tone was unfailingly cold, but it was as if you didn't decide it and it came out automatically.

"are you okay?" he asked, and you nodded against his chest, turned to face him, you were distant and could feel it.

he nodded in return and placed a kiss on your forehead.
"I'll get the coats." he said, making a small gesture with his head, and then went to the room next to the living room to get your coats.

within minutes you found yourselves walking in the cold night air, it was never too cold in los angeles though.

you and miles lived really close to each other, five minutes apart.
the silence was so deafening between you that only your breaths could be heard; there was a kind of tension that there never was between you.

once home, you took off your coat and your dr. martens, and he did the same.
"honey, are you sure you are all right?" he asked you as you went to your room.

"yes, why?"you replied with a sigh, you were both tipsy, but you both held your alcohol really well.
"nothing, just—" he sighed too, "never mind" and smiled at you a little, that smile you always melt at, but not this time.

you changed, dressing in your - his - shirt to sleep, then went to the bathroom to brushing your teeth and removing the light makeup from your face.

alex hadn't gone into the bathroom as he usually did while you were getting ready for sleep; he understood that you wanted space, because it's true that he had taken a good dose of alcohol, but he wasn't stupid.
he knew that something had happened to upset you.

you lay in bed, on your side, and then alex joined you.
you didn't touch each other, so much as brush against each other, both of you staring at the ceiling.

"y/n?" he called your name, and this only happened during arguments.

"hmm?" you casted a glance at him, but you don't turn around to face him, maybe you didn't have the courage, after all you were worrying and distancing yourself over something really stupid, you knew it too, but I couldn't help it.

"What's going on?" he asked you, you can tell by his tone of voice that he is subtly begging you to tell him what's going on.

"nothing." you answered him, and to your chagrin, it comes out in a really harsh, almost rude tone.

"stop doing that and tell me what's going on" he had sat down on the bed and so you did the same, rested a hand on your forehead, then the tips of his fingers grazed your lips, later went through your hair.

"It's stupid." you replied, as if you wanted to cut off the conversation there, but you knew he would never let you.

"whatever you have that makes you feel upset, it's not stupid, okay?" he took your face in his large hands and gave you a kiss on the forehead.
"okay honey?" he whispered and you nod.

"when I saw you with those girls—" you began, but alex interrupts with an "oh" hummed.
"is my girlfriend by any chance jealous?" he giggled.

you can't help but blush and giggle, because you both know the situation is rather silly.

"yes, I'm jealous, so what?" you smiled and so does he, then he quickly lays you down on the mattress and he positions himself on top of you keeping on his elbows, starting to give you kisses all over your face and so you laugh until you get tired.

alex lies completely on you is so automatically you start stroking his hair. "it's just that when they touched you, I felt bad, because they were clearly vour type" you mumbled.

he sighed, clearly feeling guilty for not giving you attention during the evening, but spending it with those two.

"i'm sorry, love" he whispered raising his hand to caress your cheek, "really" he added.
"it's okay" you smiled, "love you" you kissed his forehead softly.

"i love you too, light of my eyes" he said leaning his head between your shoulder and neck, you feel his smile against your skin.
a little later you hear his breathing get deeper and realize he has fallen asleep, you continue stroking his hair and fall asleep too.