PRISON MOVIE

I'm getting you out of here

     Lincoln looked out the window as the bus gradually approached the prison, and then stopped.  "Well, here I am.  This is prison."

     Captain Jay Kurk was the head of the guards.  He was relatively new at the J.O.Y. correctional facility.  He was often secretly made fun of as "Captain Kurk" by the inmates. 

     Lincoln curiously looked at the sign on the wall.  "Why is this prison called the J.O.Y. ?" 

     A 10 cent dime mysteriously dropped to the floor. 

     Captain Jay Kurk replied "Son, if you really think this prison will correct or rehabilitate criminals...well...I'm afraid the Joke's On You...hahaha!"  For some reason everyone who saw Lincoln started laughing out loud, guards and inmates alike. 

     Mysteriously... Lincoln saw a circus clown wearing a prison uniform, though just for a moment.  Lincoln rubbed his face and looked away.  "Am I losing my mind?"

     With a strict tone, Captain Jay Kurk introduced Lincoln to the most trusted senior inmate.  His name was Alfred "Green" Goondall.  Alfred was elderly, had a very long beard, and wore false teeth. 

     "Green will give you a tour" said the Captain to Lincoln. 

     And so, Alfred "Green" Goondall introduced Lincoln to the inmates and gave him a tour of the prison. 

     Meanwhile... "Dirt Bag" arrived at the prison in a taxi, furious that he had been kicked off the prison bus. 

     After the tour, Captain Jay Kurk smirked at Lincoln and said "How was your tour?"  Foolishly,  Lincoln laughed and said "Oh my God, I just realized something, you are literally Captain Kurk!"  Ha!

     Kurk quickly retaliated by introducing Lincoln to his cell mate, whom Lincoln had not yet met.  Cruelly, Captain Kurk smirked and said "Oh, by the way, here's your new cell mate."

     Lincoln's cell mate introduced himself.  "Hello, you must be Lincoln.  My real name is Shirley, but you can call me Sugar."  Lincoln was afraid and the reality of prison was wearing his nerves. 

     Alfred "Green" Goondall's narration:  "Lincoln decided to try to cool down and relax.  Unfortunately, he was about to step into the WORST area of any prison... THE SHOWER!"

     Wearing a towel, Lincoln had just stepped into the shower room.  Shirley aka "Sugar" was also wearing a towel and immediately followed Lincoln, who clumsily dropped a bar of soap.  "Would you like me to get that for you?" said Shirley. 

     "No, no, no, no, no! I got it."  Lincoln cautiously picked up the soap. 

     He looked at Lincoln while twirling his head and said "Don't ever call me Shirley."

     Shirley aka Sugar then smiled, winked several times at Lincoln and said "Would you like to be my friend?  I would REALLY like to be your friend.  I'm Sugar but you're sweet enough. 

     Lincoln looked up and prayed for a miracle.  "Dear God, I don't want to become something that rhymes with the word... ITCH."

     Feeling very offended, Shirley aka Sugar said to him "You think this is a prison movie?"  He continued and said "I know which word rhymes with the word itch."  Hurt and angry, Sugar snapped "Who do you think I am?"

     "But I saw you winking and making eyes at me" said Lincoln.

     "HELL NO!" shouted Sugar.  "I have dry eyes, I use eye drops."  Sugar then tipped his head back and put in his eye drops. 

     Then, Shirley aka Sugar put his arm around another inmate and said "Besides, I already have this guy."

     Just before supper the Captain, Jay Kurk, smirked at Lincoln and said "You have a visitor."

     The visitor was Michael!

     Calm, cool and with genuine concern, Michael asked "How are you doing here, Linc?"

     Lincoln snapped and said "Well, let me see, I was thrown in prison for getting punched in the face.  I have a cell mate named Shirley who wants me to call him Sugar.  And, on top of all that I think I might be hallucinating."

     Then... Lincoln sarcastically asked "How was YOUR DAY Michael?"

     Michael Scofool slowly looked around to make sure no one was listening. 

     "Linc, I'm getting you out of here."