Beyond Friendship

CHAPTER 4 | AMANDA

The air around me feels stifling, like a sea of dread I can't outswim. My fingertips dance along the cold, jagged stone wall behind the club, trying and failing to douse the fire of emotions burning inside me. Tipping my face up to the night sky, I pray for these feelings to vanish. How much simpler it would all be if the spark between us was snuffed out. But no, it's always there, and since he chooses to ignore it, I won't beg him to initiate something more, so we remain in the friends with chemistry zone. Even though I desperately want to blank out my craving for him, a tiny glimmer of hope still lingers that one day he'll look into my eyes and say he wants to give us a try. But what am I wishing for? He is the king of casual flings, while I yearn for a serious relationship—fidelity and commitment.

"Amanda?

I lift my gaze and watch Bella march toward me with intent. The delicate fabric of her soft pink dress clings to her pale skin while her vibrant red hair is secured in an elegant bun.

She takes another step closer. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing much. Just Brian and his big mouth again."

Bella listens as I explain what happened. She knows, like the rest of the girls, that I've got feelings for the man who is our mutual friend. When I'm done, her gaze never leaves mine as she gives her opinion.

"Don't let our one-night Romeo friend confuse you."

I chuckle at her new nickname for him. My gaze draws back to the twinkling stars above us. "Yeah, you're right. I need to focus my attention on making things work with Steven."

She gives my arm a gentle squeeze.

"How are things going between the two of you?"

I shrug. "Kind of good. We've been on four dates so far and he's a nice and attractive guy who loves to talk about his job and his successes."

I trail off, glancing away from Bella when addressing another truth. "But sometimes I feel like he's competing with me, like he insists on proving his success while belittling my dreams and efforts. And he never really compliments them either."

"Then I say move on," Bella says in a clear tone. God, I love her down-to-earth attitude toward life and the levelheadedness she exudes. She always gives you her honest opinion but never in a cruel way. It's just what I need to calm my emotions.

The thought of finding someone new to date tires me. I look at my friend. "Or maybe I give it another chance? He is a good kisser... that counts for something."

Bella pauses, wiping a strand of red hair from her cheek. "But is that something enough?"

I shrug. "Time will tell."

My sweet friend nods.

"So how is your dating going?" I ask.

"Disastrous. So let's not get into that, please."

I chuckle. "Okay. What about your painting? How is that going?"

Straightaway her face lights up.

"Not bad. And I'm having a chat with Brian soon, as he wants to pimp the VIP lounge with fitting, unique art."

"Oh, that's great. You'll no doubt make something stunning."

Bella is an artist who makes paintings for a living. She's modest about it herself, but she shouldn't be because what she makes is mind-blowing. And I still wonder why her talent hasn't been discovered yet. But then again, I'm not an art expert. Our heads turn sideways when we hear approaching footsteps, and for a second, I hope it's Brian, but it's not.