BEN BEGUM ( I'M A " LEADER " )

chapter TWO : evet , ottomans?

Eh, my life. Eh, my innocence. What will happen to you now? Ben begum, Ben insan. But what will happen? I don't know. No, I do know. My dreams sing to me. I've known almost everything, detail to detail. But I don't know how I'd feel. I don't know if I'd feel scared, if I'd be emotionless. I don't know.

Allah has given me the gift of dreams. Dreams that can see the future. I can't chose when I dream these dreams, I can't chose what I will dream. But I do dream  , and my dreams will happen. A few details may change but the end will usually be the same. Changing what I see in my dreams wouldn't do me good. It's how my mother lost my father and how I killed my mother.  

I don't mean I physically did something to kill her. But still it  maybe wouldn't happen if I didn't try to alter Allah's will.  I tried to stop a death of another only for it to cost the life of my dearest person. And it wasn't even permanent because not long after the soul I was trying to save died as well. Same day even.

I didn't even get to mourn them as I was too lost after the loss of my mother.

My mother had a similar gift from the Almighty . She taught me a lot.
Because of this gift a man could become a high ranking effendi. Could get fame and a lot of coins  . Could get whatever he liked. But us women?  We are witches. Devils and sinners.

The  Almighty has never said that his gift of dreams makes one bad. He never said women are less than man. The Almighty even said it's 3 times mother then father on the 4th.

But still, our people weren't brought up properly. They haven't been raised by the holy book but they've been raised by the devil's lullaby.

May Allah protect and guide every soul on this world. InshAllah.

" moon careful girl , careful. We don't want them to slaughter you oh my lovely mare. "

I slowed down my horse once I could see that we are nearing the ottomans. It was midday now.

As I'm going slower now I can't help my thoughts. Memories from before flooding my mind.

I remembered my mother, a few months before her death. I caught her worriedly reading a letter near the cabin. A tear falling down her eye.

I worriedly approached her asking her what was wrong. She quickly hid the letter when she saw me.

" mother is everything okay? "

" it is my sweet daughter. "

I managed to find out later that Sultan Selim I has died and that his son Suleiman has become Sultan. I also managed to find out that Ayse has died. Ayse was the concubine of Sultan Selim ... She was mother of Shah Sultan, Fatma sultana, Beyhan Sultana.... Sister of Hafsa Sultana the mother of the new Sultan.  And sister of my mother, Princess Rasha.

My mother was the younger sister of Hafsa Valide Sultan and Ayse Sultan. She was the aunt of Sultan Suleiman and she was a princess from the Crimea.

I knew for a fact she wasn't crying that day because of the Sultans death. But because of the death of her sister.

Eh, fate.

I curse everyone that says life isn't a game. It is. Life is a cruel game of fate, luck, manipulation.

I couldn't tell how much I ended up needing to reach the town. But once I arrived I was immediately surrounded.

" who are you?! " yelled a Janasary.

" Ben Alshiba Begum! " I shouted just enough for him to hear me. " Get down. " he looked at his superior and they nodded at each other. The man then come closer to me and ordered me. " I will but I want to see Ahmed first. " I said sternly.

The man looked at me with no expression and then turned to his superior again. Who nodded and turned as well signaling something to the people in the back.

" Begum no! Why are you here!? "  Ahmed cried out. I gasped a little at his condition. " I had to, you still didn't meet your children properly. " his eyes widden and fell to the floor. " children? "

" there. Now go down. " I nodded at the man and did as told. Taking his hand when he offered it for me to get down. " thank you. "

" brother, why don't you let my friend go. His wife just gave birth to twins. It isn't good for them to lose from their birth. " I spoke to the man's superior just like he was my own blood. I could see that he was a little taken aback at my ' friendliness. " know your place! Who are you to ask favors?! You traitor ! " yelled another man. I could tell he was of lower rank. " well, for once. I'm someone who knows her people. You should probably do that too. " I said with  a laugh in my voice the men around me stealing confused glanced towards each other's  .  " what's that supposed to mean? " the man yelled out.  I moved a little closer to the young man that helped me get down from my horse, making him walk a little back.

Perfect we are away from the horse.

" can I please talk to Ahmed, I want to tell him about his children. He looks like he won't make it. ? " I asked the superior and after thinking for a long time he agreed. I wasn't lying Ahmed really looked like he wasn't going to make it. But only if you're not familiar with him.

The man holding Ahmed come towards us. The man... The man that pretends to be an ottoman. Kristian.    Glad he made it.  I thought  as I prevented the smirk that crept my face.

Just when they were in front of me. They both jumped on the horse, one after another. " come mediha ! " ahmed yelled out to me as he put out his hand for me to take.

I knew there was no space for me.

I just shook my head and gave them  gentle smile before hitting the side / butt of my horse making her start running towards the forest.

I'm going to miss her.

They ran , I could see pure horror on Ahmed's face.   It didn't take long for 5 Janissaries to follow them with their horses. That would be 5 dead bodies for later  . I thought.

" how dare you!?! " the lower ranking man yelled strolling towards me hand on his sword. " HOLD! Oh you insolent foul! It isn't just anyone you're threatening. In front of you there stands a Sultana! A princess! Sultan Suleimans first cousin! "

A man from behind yelled.