It all started with a CD

Chapter 7

"You guys are so in love", Fiona concludes after I told her every detail of the twelve dates I've been on with Harry. It's currently the 22nd of October, and if we don't see each other on our dates, Harry comes to visit me in the shop. I once took the tube and picked him up at his university, and he showed me the building. That was fun and so boyfriend-like. We aren't even in a relationship, we haven't fucked or anything, but it gave me boyfriends-vibes, which made me happy.

"I know", I reply while looking through the new magazines we've got.

"So you admit it?"

I think about what she just said. In love is a big word. Like, a really big word. Especially if you think of the fact that we only know each other for about two months and one week.

"Hm", is my response. I sit down on top of the counter (because I am cool) and continue looking through the pages. Why are people nowadays so obsessed with Taylor Swift? I don't like country music. I only know about five songs of her, but I prefer my own music taste.

"You're weird", Fiona says, then she sits down next to me. She dyed her hair again; the blue colour is now a little darker. Her big brown eyes are curiously staring at me. "So, who tops?"

Why is everyone so obsessed with this top-and-bottom-thing? Like, first of all, it's none of their business, and second of all it isn't such a big deal. "No one, Fiona. If you only want to talk about sex, go to Sophia. I'm sure she'll tell you something."

"I just wanted to know-"

"We haven't slept with each other, okay? Our priorities are different than yours."

It's really not that I don't want to, or that Harry doesn't want to. Harry always asks me if he should drive me home or if I want to stay with him for the night, and he makes weird sex jokes all the time. I'm just not ready. I'm scared, because right now, everything is amazing and I don't want this to be ruined. What if he will not like it with me? What if it destroys what we have at the moment? What if he actually is like the other and leaves before I wake up? What if he never calls again, never comes to the shop again? What if?!

I know he's not like that. I know it, because his first intention was never to sleep with me, and because he always gives me the option and never complains. I just don't want to be disappointed.

"But do you want to be, like, his boyfriend?"

I smile. It gets all warm and bubbly inside of me as I think of that. "Of course."

"Without having ever slept with him? What if he's bad in bed?"

"Oh my god, I don't care about that!" I angrily close the magazine. "It's not that what counts for me!"

"But... you want to sleep with him?"

"Yes, but not right now!"

"You are so complicated."

"I'm not." I cross my arms. "Before I met Harry, every time I went on a date with some boy, the first thing I did was sleep with him. But this has changed now. I really like Harry and he likes me. He's handsome and soft and smart and perfect for me. I don't want to ruin this."

"Whatever, I'm not you." She rolls her eyes. "I just think it's dumb. You aren't teenagers anymore."

I just grab the magazine and continue looking at the photos. I never really read magazines, unless I find some article that actually interests me. I stop at the picture of some boyband or some shit like that. Six boys, two of them are pretty, the other ones are alright. None of them is as beautiful as Harry, though. None of them has those mesmerising eyes, those long curls, those kissable lips. And the dimples! I sigh. I'm so gone.