Down the Rabbit Hole

Chapter 17 Hatter

I couldn't hold my tongue once Cheshire was out of view. I wanted to ask her more personal things about her life, but I also didn't want to embarrass her. She's still looking down the path when she asks.
"Do you remember all our dreams together?" I see her cheeks get pink again and I know what she's trying to ask. She wants to know if I remember how we would fuck at this very table.
"I can remember every important detail about our time together. They may have felt like dreams, but they were as real as the conversation we're having right now. And I understand that you may feel differently about the time we spent together, but I will always respect your choice. Even if you decide to return to the other side and let our times just be memories, I will respect it. The real question is, do you remember our time together?" I watch as she slowly swallows another sip of tea and I can tell she's thinking of her next words will be. It's driving me mad, waiting for her to say something. Anything. I want to beg her to let me stay by her side. I need to know if her feelings are the same as they have been or if she had preferred me as only a dream.
The silence is becoming deafening before she finally speaks.
"Did you really mean what you said earlier? About wanting to be by my side and following me where I decide to go?" Her voice is quiet and unsure. Almost as if she's afraid what I had confessed earlier was just pretty words to entice her.
"Every word I have said over the last 20 years have been the truth. I may not have realized we were stuck in a dream, but that makes it all the more real for me. I fell in love with you over these last few years and I don't see that changing. Ever." Her breathing has quickened and I can see her playing with the bows on her dress. It's taking everything in me not to pull her into my lap and prove my feelings to her.
"Is it because we're claimed halves?" I try to hide my shock from her. How did she know? I never mentioned anything about her being my claimed half in any of the dreams. She finally looks at me and answers.
"Ches told me. He let it slip today about what it means." I can't help but sneer. Fucking perfect. Fucking guardian. Though I understand his need to protect and educate her, I never wanted that information to influence her decision.
"You don't have to accept the connection, Alice. I would understand if you wouldn't want that. To be tied to me for the rest of your life. There will never be another for me though. You can walk away from here and I'll stay nothing more than pleasant memories and I will be content with the time we had together. A forced connection has never ended well and I want you to be happy. Even if that's not with me." I can almost feel my heart starting to break as I think of her walking away without me. I close my eyes and wait for her decision, if she chooses to leave though I can't sit and watch her walk away. Seeing her go through that gate again would kill part of me. I'm a man of my word though. If she decides she wants nothing more to do with me then I'd respect her wishes and I'd find a way to live my life content with the memories we've made together.
Suddenly I feel her straddle my lap and my eyes fly open. I look up and see her blue eyes misty with tears before she gently leans down and kisses my cheek.
"Thank you Hatter."
"For what, Alice?" Why was she thanking me? Was she trying to torture me before she leaves? Feeling her body in my lap and her lips on my skin as a final reminder of her before she leaves forever?
"For giving me a choice. For letting me choose you. I've spent years feeling out of control of my life. So many people have tried to get me to just let go of something I was so sure was actually real. My family has been telling me to stop chasing a dream and live in reality. They've made me feel like I didn't have a choice. That I had to let go of what I believed was real and just accept their version of the world. No matter how much it would hurt to let you go. You though, you would let me walk away even though it's not what you want. You are the only one who has truly listened to me in 20 years." She starts to gently kiss my lips as she talks. "I've been hunting for a man just like you on the other side. Even in my world no one has measured up to my memories of you." I growl slightly as I think of her looking for someone else. Hunting for a second rate version of me while I've been aching for her here. She chuckles and places my hands on her hips. Pulling back a bit to look in my eyes she says.
"I only wanted someone like you because I thought you were just a dream. No one has even come close to what I feel for you. And now that I know your real, why would I want anyone else? You're the one I want, my Hatter." I pull her closer to me, letting her feel how hard she's made me. I start kissing her neck and I feel her start to grind her hips against me.
"There has never been anyone else for me. Ever since you walked through my gate I knew, you're the one I want. I have courted others before, but no one felt right. I was hunting for you even before I knew you existed, my love. And I was prepared to let you walk away again. Now though, you're not getting rid of me my love. I'm yours and only yours." She grinds against me harder and runs her hands up my chest and into my hair.
"Naughty little tart today aren't you? So eager to get fucked. Are you so desperate for my cock? It's been too long since the last dream when I had you bent over the table. This time I get to feel you cum around my cock for real." She groans and presses closer to me. I nuzzle against her shoulder and start to nip her skin. I want to leave my marks all over her beautiful skin. Finally marking her as mine. Her hands grip my hair and she gently tugs me closer. Silently begging me for more.
"Does my Alice need some proper attention from her Hatter? Do you want to feel me for real? I want to hear you say it my love. Say 'please fuck me Hatter'. I want to take you here and now my love." I feel her nod and grind harder against me. I stop her moving against me and I hear her needy whine. I almost cum at the sound, but I want this to last.
"I want to hear you say it Alice. Use your words. Let me hear all the dirty things you want me to do to you."  She gently uses my hair to pull my head back and look into her eyes.
"Please fuck me Hatter. I need to feel you inside me for real. No more dreams, I need you. Please." I love to hear her beg. I smile and kiss my way down her neck and drag my teeth along her skin. 
"Anything for my little tart. We're going to take it slow though, I want this to last. And with how your grinding your needy little pussy on me I can tell you need a good long fucking." She pulls against my hair harder and I groan. "Easy my love. Don't get to over eager or this will be much faster than either of us will want." She loosens her grip and gently moves my head back so she can kiss me. She tastes like shortbread cookies and white tea with her own personal taste. In the previous dreams I could only ever taste the tea and treats on her tongue, probably because she was so far away from the tree and she hadn't mastered her dream walking skills quite yet. Now though I can taste everything about her and I can smell her skin heating up as she continues to grind on my lap. I break the kiss only to kiss down her chest as I allow my hands to roam all over her generous curves.
"Sit on the table my love. I want to explore your every curve and commit it to memory." She giggles as she pushes the dishes back and sits down.
"We've been doing this for years, I thought you'd know my body like the back of your hand by now." She gives me a sultry look and I grab her left ankle.
"Ah, but my love, those were dreams. They felt muted and distant compared to now that I have you in my hands. This is what I think we've both been craving. For the touches to feel real and not through a veil." Kissing her up her calf I gently remove her shoe and gently massage her foot with one hand.
"I don't know if I ever told you or if Cheshire ever told you, but I had a vision when I first touched your hand.  I saw you back here in this blue dress having tea with me and you winked at me. That's how I knew you'd at least come back to me if you didn't choose to stay. I knew I just had to hold on to that vision and you would come back home to me. This will always be your home my love." I stop kissing her leg once I reach the hem of her dress and I start the process over again with her right leg. She's practically panting as I savor my first real moments with her.
"I thought today was going to be horrible. My family wanted me to wear this stupid dress. I have had almost nothing, but bad memories since I left here. After I fell from that tree and hit my head, everyone has been trying to convince me that this was all a dream or just something my mind made up to cope with the injury." She moans loud as I start to kiss up her thighs just under her dress.
"You can tell me all about it, my love. I promise I'm listening." It wasn't a complete lie, but I couldn't fully concentrate on what she was saying, not when I could smell her arousal.
"Fuck it. Hmmm. We can talk about my sad life on the other side later." That made me pause. I look up at her and I can see a mix of emotions swimming in her eyes.
"Alice. If you want to talk about anything then this can wait while we talk. If you want to sit and enjoy tea while we talk about your life after you left then I'd be happy to talk about anything you want. If were moving too fast let me know and I'll slow down. What do you need to do?" I can't tell if she's nervous or excited, but I need to know we're not moving too fast and that she'll regret this later. She starts to relax again once she realizes she could stop at any moment. From the little she's told me I know she's not been taken seriously or been listened to much in her life and I intend to change that. I want to be her safe space. The one safe haven that she can always run to.
"I need you Hatter. Please. I'm sorry, I just talk a lot when I get excited." Her body language is  more relaxed now and I can see a more settled look in her eyes. I kiss above her knees again as I say.
"Talk as much as you want my love. I'll have you screaming for me soon enough." She runs her hand through my hair again and she pulls me up to kiss her. She kisses me gently and I reassure her.
"Don't apologize for who you are. If you want to read from the history books while we fuck, then do it. I'll even read to you as long as I can keep my mind on the book if that's what you want. As long as your happy and comfortable you can do as you like. I want to be your safe space. You can be whoever you want to be with me my love." She smiles and sighs before her hands run down my chest and to my surprise she rips my shirt in two. Ruining the buttons and getting my cock hard as stone at the same moment.
"I just want you. No more talking. We can get into the kinky stuff later. And I'll have Ches replace the shirt." I laugh as she starts to kiss my neck and pull my shirt off.
"So eager, my love. And yes, I agree, no more talking. I do have to ask if you have any attachment to this pretty blue dress of yours."
"None. Shred it or burn it. I don't care." Her hands are trying to figure out my belt as I grab a knife off the table. She pauses a moment when she sees the knife but her hands don't let go of my pants or the belt.
"Hold very still my little tart. I'm going to cut this dress off of you. And I would hate to nick your pretty skin." She moans and moves her hands to her sides and leans back slightly with a naughty wicked grin on her face. Almost daring me the show her my rougher side.
"Oooh my adventuress little tart. So trusting. Good thing I'm handy with a knife. I haven't even nicked myself yet." I gently start to slice down the middle of the dress revealing to me that she's not wearing a bra underneath. I can't hold back my groan as I finish cutting her dress. Seeing her on our table spread open for me to enjoy it's starting to drive me mad. I can feel my magic starting to swell and I'm starting to feel whole again. I am definitely never letting her leave my side again.