Memoirs of Love, Sex, and Other Things that I'm not good at

03/04/2023

I call it pot luck; I fucked an ex-Nazi without knowing it before and that will never not be funny. Worst part is she was a human praying mantis.

Had a whole ass relationship with her for many months, her whole persona wasn't what you'd expect. Had no clue, even though I suspected that, there was something kind of off about her, thought her blue eyes did drive me crazy at the time. A next door neighbour, with some suspicious behaviour for sure, but other than that, really attractive and overall pleasant.

But I gotta admit it was on me. The small signs were there.

If I can't ignore red flags better than anyone else then, idk who does at this point.

This person who used to hate Polish people and Jews?

Oh yea, go with that one. I'm sure she's not weird for taking so much interest in my 'swedish heritage'. No Spidey senses tingling ? No 'she might be a Nazi" senses tingling either ? Guess not!

Develop feelings for this one specifically, meanwhile you have 4 dating apps installed and could go out and date some non ex Nazi women... I hope.. you never know anymore. If someone that normal-looking was in one of those fucking sekts then I wouldn't be surprised if any other average woman on a dating app would be too.

Pot luck I say, who would have known she had a cultish Nazi past.

Ignore the fact that they are also taken and you were never into polyamoury, it's definitely not a weird cover up for a cult and you're a bad person for not giving it a go when she's so invested in you!

Walt, now I know I know, you are there scratching your grey hairs off reading all this, but hear me out. When a pretty girl cries we all react the same way, we cave in, (this is where you shake your head 'no' and sigh in disappointment)

I'm sure this polyamoury shit won't leave you used and heartbroken, you stupid git.

At least I didn't know about the Nazi thing until couple months in but, man I know how to pick em is all.

Two years ago, if you'd tell me that I'd be crying my heart out completely broken and lied to, all over an ex Nazi I think I'd look at my girlfriend at the time and ask myself just how bad the breakup between us was to make me do that.

And then if you said that she would be essentially trying to make a blood sacrifice out of me, I think I'd call you insane.