Never In Your Favor - Finnick Odair

8

"It's ok," Finnick gasped, breathing hard from running down the hallway and into Kaianna's room once again. He rushed over to his partner's bed and sat in the empty space next to her, rubbing her back reassuringly as she tried not to break down in tears, "it's alright, it was just a dream."

Kaianna nodded her head, and rubbed her face tiredly, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize," He hushed, "are you alright?"

Kaianna had lost sight of what that question truly meant. Were any of them, ever alright? Even before the game, the world was messed up. Was anyone living in the same time as them, truly ok?

"Have you heard anything?" She changed the topic, very smoothly. Finnick almost smirked at her avoidance, but decided against it.

"No," He chuckled, "no. Uh- Peeta's baby bomb was genius, and I swear it almost worked but, no. The games are still on."

Kaianna sighed, remembering the smile they had exchanged when Peeta told the crowd about Katniss's nonexistent pregnancy. The announcement caused a chaos that they were all sure would end the games. However, such luck didn't seem to exist.

"What's that?" Kaianna focused on the golden bengal bracelet that Finnick was fiddling with.

"This," He held the jewelry up with pride, "the fuck if I know. All that matters is that Haymitch gave it to me."

Kaianna smiled softly, knowing what the gesture meant, "So they trust us?"

"Hardly," She tilted her head, confusingly, warranting him to continue, "Katniss doesn't want me as an ally. She wants you."

"Oh," Kaianna said flatly, moving her focus to the silk sheets she was wrapped up in, "well they can't just have one of us. It's both of us or neither of us-"

"Easy tiger," Finnick chuckled, "he gave me this bracelet. They understand that it's all or nothing. It was either us or Beetee and Wiress."

"And what's wrong with Beetee and Wiress?" Kaianna scooted closer to the man, challenging him with her eyes. She had gotten close, causing him to struggle silently, with keeping his breath a normal pace.

"Don't do that," He mumbled, his breath hitching slightly when his partner ignored his request, "you're playing a dangerous game right now."

"How so?"

Finnick ignored her question. His eyes flickered to his lips, and he nudged her away from him playfully, "Anyways, it's not like they're exactly advanced in combat."

"Maybe," Kaianna scoffed as she climbed out of the bed. Finnick let his eyes scan over her body, reminding himself of the night on the balcony when he couldn't keep his eyes from admiring the way the silk nightgown fit her perfectly, "but they're smarter than you'll ever begin to dream of being."

"Fair enough," He chuckled lightly, "you're leaving so soon?"

"I'm going to shower," She shrugged, "it's probably the last one I'll take for awhile. Or, ever, if this all goes South."

"I wish you weren't such a downer," He scoffed, "and I wish we weren't here."

"and where else would we be?"

"Home." Finnick's honesty came through immediately. The teasing glint in Kaianna's eyes wiped away when he sighed.

"Why?"

"I don't know-"

"Yes you do," Kaianna could finally start to see through her partner's facade, and it worried her. She didn't want to know him because quite frankly, she was still having a hard time accepting that there was a chance that they could both get out of this whole thing alive, "so just say it. Haven't you had enough with all the pretending?"

"Maybe if we were back home, things could be different," He confessed, "for us, I mean."

She stepped toward the man, looking down on him when she was in front of him, "I don't think so."

"How can you say something like that so confidently?"

"Because," She chuckled lightly as she leaned against the doorway of her bathroom, "do you remember what I said about you the day of the reaping?"

Finnick nodded.

"I genuinely believed every word-"

"I know you did," He smiled thoughtfully, "I've never heard you say a single thing that felt scripted. You always just- say what you want to. What you're thinking I've always enjoyed that about you."

"Except I don't Finnick," Kaianna scoffed, "not always anyway."

"And not right now." He corrected.

"Not right now," Kaianna agreed. Her green eyes shined with an emotion that Finnick recognized immediately, from feeling it himself. They understood what each other were feeling, and exactly what was being said without words. Which was good, considering neither of them had the guts to say it out loud, "probably not ever."

"That's not true." He smiled knowingly.

"The point is," Kaianna dodged his belief easily, "my view on you is starting to change. I've been able to see you from a different perspective, and I never would've let that happen on my own."

"I believe that." He chuckled.

"Don't take it personally," She shrugged. When she looked in his eyes, she knew he somehow didn't understand where she was coming from, "everyone I've ever loved, has been stolen from me. To get to know someone, is to let yourself care about them, and all that does, is put them in danger. In my experience at least."

"That's another thing," Finnick breathed out. His eyes blinked faster as he tried to keep himself from getting lost in hers, "I used to think you were so cynical, and you're really not. You're a good person who's just been through a lot. We've all dealt with this differently. So, it was wrong for me to judge you so fast."

"You think so?"

The blonde haired boy, nodded again, "You're view on the world, is just a few shades darker than mine."

A wave of appreciation flowed through her, and it took her by surprise. He saw her more than she realized. More than she wanted to admit to herself. She would never admit it to herself. Neither tribute was as good as hiding as they thought they were. Not when they were around each other.

It was in that moment, that Kaianna's original image of Finnick, washed away almost entirely. He wasn't selfish, or egotistical in the slightest. He was just scared, and slow to trust. Doing whatever he could to stay alive. Just like everyone else. Just like her.

"Ok," She sighed hesitantly, "as fun and lighthearted as this all has gotten, I am in desperate need of a shower. Try not to get too comfortable on my bed. We'll be sleeping god knows where by the end of today."

"If we make it that far." Finnick grinned.

"With our positive attitudes? There's simply nothing we can't accomplish!" Kaianna joked.

"Taking advantage of our fleeting comfort by snuggling into your sheets, and going back to sleep sounds like the perfect plan to me!"

Kaianna rolled her eyes at the man, more playfully than she ever had, before locking herself behind her bathroom door. She stepped out of her nightgown, and into the shower, getting ready for the day she had been dreading. The day they'd enter the arena.

She scrubbed herself raw, with the goal of wiping away her memories of the last week. Things wouldn't stay the same. They couldn't. She wanted every inkling in her chest that told her she could trust Finnick, that they could be anything more than allies, to wash itself down the drain.

Trust leads to demise, and the only way to get through this event remotely unscathed, is to be emotionless, and far away from everyone else involved. But, that wasn't possible. Not for the girl trying to lose what was left of her morals, in the almost boiling hot water, and not for the boy who had thrown away the goal of trying to sleep, discovering that the only thing closing his eyes would achieve, was the image of a certain hazel-green eyed girl, that pretty much had become attached to when they were kids.