On Your Wedding Day

Crazy

August 2011

Life is a collection of songs struck on your head in every milestone in your life. I remember spending my afternoons at the age of 5 dancing to the song my mom plays in the stereo as my Mom taught me every single step to it. Reducing wrong footsteps at each repeat of the tape until we have reached perfection. Okay, maybe iy was just until Mom gave up of my robotic hips.

Then like all Dad's who gush over Elvis Presley. He would barge into my room at 7 AM dancing through a full blast of Jailhouse Rock on the stereo forcing me to wake up for class. I would be groaning at this routine of his for around 8 mins only to laugh at his crazy antics until I find myself dancing with him on our way to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. That's some good thing right there. But I loved it the most when we're at my bedroom at 8 in the evening and just before I go to sleep, he would tuck me to bed and hum a melody of I can't help falling in love with you as I drift to slumber.

Road trips then were full of Bon Jovi as me and my sister scream on the top of our lungs as Dad records numerous home made videos he plays at Christmas parties as he invites relatives for dinner. It was fun at first but we keep seeing these videos playing as we gets older, it became such a nightmare that we had created the biggest plot to lose those tapes. And by biggest I mean digging a shallow hole on the backyard and giving those tapes a funeral they deserve only to get caught in the speech. Story cut short, we failed but Dad got the idea that the new Christmas were no longer for home made videos. Only to settle of an idea he describe as "brilliant" as live Christmas plays me and my cousins participated in. And that's how Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer stepped in.

But no matter how old I get, I keep singing the bohemian rhapsody at different pitches I could make because that song requires that much of love, effort and respect. These songs were the songs of my life. And I swear it was very long lost for a playlist and I could picture it getting longer over the years.

Then I met her.

She sang songs with no fear of being judged, laughed her way through the lyrics like as if she was sliding down from a rainbow. She listened to songs like it was written for her. She held unto songs that spoke her mind and touched her heart either with gentle kisses or painful paper cuts. I could always tell which one is it 99%of the time. I mean, I have stared into those eyes longer than I have spent staring to the eyes of the 70% people of my life, and statistically that speaks a lot.

She loves music just as much as I have loved writing. The only difference is she doesn't need to hide her vulnerability at anytime of the day. She could spend her day memorizing Alicia Keys songs like she haven't done it 5 years ago. But I would often find her singing songs of Westlife as her eyes would swell up tears as she read cliche love stories. She would gush about concerts from her favorite boy bands she grew up to and I would normally be not so excited about it but seeing her so happy of the thought of jamming to her favorite songs is a kick to my gut and 2 seconds later my knees are weak for her, I end up nodding to her simple requests and spend those nights staring at her as she screams her heart out to words such as "I wanna grow old with you, I wanna die lying in your arms, I wanna grow old with you, I wanna be looking in your eyes..." And she would look back and catch me staring with her eyes brimming some almost fallen tears but she gives me a smile like her heart is full and you feel it. The mere thought that I'm standing beside her at probably one of her best days swells my heart in a sweet painful ache that makes it just as full as hers.

I remember how she first ran through the songs of a band called A1, how she almost jumped on me at a quiet night in my room as I study for an exam the very next day and the only reason she's with me is to make sure I keep myself awake until I finished it all. Anyway, while I was busy running thoughts through numerous terms and descriptions, she was busy going through a playlist of what she describe as "stole my heart".