Pomp and Circumstance: A Pride and Prejudice Continuation

Chapter 20: The Virtue of High Stature

"If you were only to hear him, Mary! He said such things - such queer, incomprehensible things; that he was maddened to see attentions paid to me so by other gentlemen, that he could not bear to continue seeing me so cold and indifferent to him; that he has no notion of what ills he has committed, that have put him in such disfavour with me." Georgiana sank down unsteadily on the couch, for which Mary was grateful, for she had feared her friend was soon to faint with the shock.

"Oh, Georgiana!" Mary said, "Please, tell me you have not accepted!"

Georgiana, whose gaze had been fixed on something far in the distance, turned now to her friend with a dazed expression, and her brows furrowed in confusion; and for a moment, her friend rather feared the worst; but evidently, it was only confusion at her question, for she said, "But of course, I did not accept, Mary! I have already once been ensnared in an ill-fated engagement, I should hardly allow it to happen again. But I simply cannot imagine what has possessed him! He seemed to be overcome with such disbelief when I refused him, as if I have ever given him any reason with my conduct to inspire such hopes - I am simply bewildered from whence this attachment has been borne! Certainly his behaviour has given no indication of it!"

And certainly, Mary could not be moved to particularly disagree; for his motivations, in her perception, had seemed to share the same root as his sisters', which was to inspire turmoil and unhappiness in surrounding company; and if it truly was his aim to engage in flirtation, it took only a moment's notice to see the unfavorable effect such approach wrought upon Georgiana, and the decline which one would suffer in her opinions as an effect. It was all most perplexing, and unexpected; and Mary found she could offer no wise words of counsel, aside from the assurance that Georgiana had acted very correctly, and that if there was indeed fault to be found here in some undue misunderstanding, then it lay solely on the gentleman's side of the affair.

But with the shock somewhat faded, Georgiana was now overcome with great unhappiness. "How unpleasant it all has been, such disagreeable conclusions to our connexions with the Bensons; I am almost glad, now, that my friendship has ended thusly with the sisters, for if I were now of need to return to Manley, and to carry on such acquaintance with them, I think it should have been unbearably discomfiting, after such circumstances as have transpired tonight."

Georgiana was inclined to return to her room upstairs, and have Mary present to everyone excuses of poor health upon her behalf; but Mary did not think this at all suitable, for Georgiana to languish and ruminate over matters on her own for the rest of the evening, particularly when there was still entertainment and merriment to be had; so she convinced her instead to return the dance, mainly on account that she should worry Lizzy and her brother if she did not; and that among all the guests, and the dances, Edmund should have no opportunity to approach or speak with her any further. "And then, all discussions with Lizzy and your brother concerning this affair might be postponed until tomorrow."

But there had been no cause to worry themselves over Edmund paying any further attentions. In the ballroom, he was standing at the side with his sisters, and was exchanging words with them in a low, dark tone; and they were greeted immediately by Lord Alstock and Sir Baynes, who wished to know if the two young ladies were quite alright, and hoped that nothing unfortunate had detained them. Lord Alstock then wasted no time in requesting Georgiana to join him for this upcoming set, and Sir Baynes, having already paid Georgiana as much favour as was allowed, asked the same of Mary. Thus, happily for her friend, they were occupied for the next hour by the dance and conversation; and when the two dances had concluded, there was no sign of Edmund Benson at all; and the sisters stood unaccompanied in the corner of the room, whispering to each other fervently.

"He has left," Georgiana murmured to Mary. "What tumult this night has brought! I have barely the strength to stand."

The conclusion of the evening found Mary and Georgiana indeed keeping one another company as the final set concluded, and all guests with the tired satisfaction of a ball well-spent and well-danced.

Lady Catherine and her party were of course invited to stay the night at Pemberley, and before retiring upstairs, Mary was surprised to find herself sought out by Miss de Bourgh, under the disapproving gaze of her Ladyship, to bid her farewell, and thank her for keeping her company this evening. "So few people appreciate the fineness of moulding artistry as you do," she said to Mary faintly, reaching to feebly grasp her hand for a moment. "It is a shame we did not have time to discuss it any further."

Mr. Collins was intent upon entrusting to her care a letter, which she should deliver to Mr. Bennet, so as to have some miscellany of his inquiries satisfied, regarding the estate and its current state of care; it seemed many of his previous letters had been unfortunately lost on the way to Longbourn, for he had never received a reply to any of them.

"I shall endeavour, certainly, sir, but perhaps, rather, it is my father's replies which are lost on their way to your parsonage," Mary said drily, and Mr. Collins was made to give pause at the consideration of this possibility, which had not heretofore occurred to him.

Lady Catherine did not deign to address Mary any further; their acquaintanceship had begun and ended with their rather short exchange. To Elizabeth, before her departure upstairs, she remarked, "I have organized and thrown many balls in my time, indeed; and I shall be happy tomorrow morning to impart to you some of the wisdoms and insights I have learned from my experiences."

"And I am certain that Mrs. Darcy shall happily return the favor to you, madam," Darcy responded, "for with her own experience being so recent, she may have the advantages of knowing all the newer fashions."

Lady Catherine was conscious of, if not pleased with, this rebuke from her nephew; but she took it as sign enough to at last attend to her room upstairs, and certainly did not catch the amused look which was exchanged on her behalf between Darcy and Elizabeth; and as he took his wife's arm, his head was bent briefly down to hers, in a teasing gesture, which revealed plainly the affection between them.

A strange knot formed in Mary's chest at the sight, which was painful and unfamiliar; and she could not be entirely rid of it, even as all of them followed suit to retire upstairs to their rooms. The evening had concluded, and though indeed it had delivered excitement and interest, it had not delivered that which she had desired from it. At long last, her hopes had exhausted all their kindling, and were scattered as so much ash upon the ground; and in their stead was left a numbness, a fissure which was yawning and wide, and void of sensibility, and somehow far worse than any wound which either anguish or melancholy could have ever inflicted.

Up in her room, where all her things were already packed, she was greeted with her desk, whose surface was bare of all things, except a sketch which pictured a flower, and which had been done by Mr. Crawford's hand. All the day she had been unable to resolve herself as to whether she should take it with her, or leave it here; perhaps, after all, he had never meant to give it to her; and then how silly it should be, carrying it around. But to leave it was to say, All is done. I have relinquished my hopes, and I have made up my mind firmly, that all is done; and this had seemed, at least this morning, a rather painful and harsh judgment to rule.

I shall decide in the morning, she told herself now, sinking into bed with the exhaustion from a day which had held agitation, excitement, and distress; and when she dreamt, she dreamt of the mouldings at Longbourn, being explained to her fastidiously by Mr. Collins; and of Edmund Benson, repeatedly inquiring if he might reserve her for the first set, which, as she kept explaining to him, had already passed; and of Mr. Crawford stood in the corner, watching all of it, and remarking to her that, all in all, seeing as she was unlikely to ever marry, he was certain she would one day make for a very suitable governess.