hidden secrets

chapter thirty-one

Alice's POV

I looked at that letter for a solid twenty minutes before I truly realized what was going on and what I had done.

I didn't really know what to do; so, I did the first sensible thing that came to my mind.

I went to the Curtis'.

If I'm gonna be even more MIA that I was before, I better at least say goodbye and tell them I'm sorry.

I walked up the door and it took me forever to get over here due to how slow I'm able to move. I hesitantly opened the door and everyone looked at me.

There was a collection of "Alice"'s heard throughout the room. Some people seemed like they were saying "Alice!" While others were saying "Alice?"

You know what I'm saying?

Sodapop immediately ran up to me and hugged me. It took me by surprise, but I hugged back. Everyone immediately started asking me a series of questions. How was I? Why was I here? What's going on?

Stuff like that.

"I'm sorry." I said bluntly.

All of them looked at me with a confused look on their face, minus Dallas who knew a little bit of what's going on. "For what?" Johnny asked.

I sighed. "Lying." They all looked at each other and then back at me. "I'm really sorry. I know it doesn't make a lot of sense now, but I am a huge liar. And I should have known this was all gonna come and bite me in the ass sooner or later."

I felt a frown creep on my face. "Alice, what's going on?" Sodapop asked nervously.

"You'll find out sooner rather than later, but it's safe to say I'm in a whole lot of trouble and there's nothing I can do about it..." I paused. "I'll see you all soon, but I really have to go."

I backed out of the house and closed the door behind me.

I went home and took a nice long shower. It felt amazing. Then I cleaned my entire house head to toe. I uncluttered everything, dusted, vacuumed, did all the dishes, and did all the laundry. Even dads which I have been putting off for a long time.

But this is it.

I called Marcus next. He didn't pick up the first time, but I was adamant on getting ahold of him. "Hello?"

"Hey, Marcus. It's Alice."

"Alice! Oh my goodness! You're ok? Wanna come over? Or- are you home from the hospital? Can I see you?"

I started to cry. "You can't and I'm sorry. I'm home, but I have somewhere to go. But I needed to let you know I'm sorry and I love you a lot."

"You're scaring me, Ali. Are you ok?"

"I'm fine..." Dallas slammed the door opened as I tried to stop crying. "I have to go. But I'm fine, I promise."

"Alice-"

I put the phone down. "What's going on?" Dallas asked.

I stood up slowly. "I have to go."

"Go where?"

"Where do you think?" I yelled.

"Don't be like that. You're scaring everyone. Even me. Now tell me what's going on?"

I broke down into a sob. "I'm getting arrested!" I screamed.

I threw the letter at him and sat down on the chair while crying into my hands.

"Ok, look. Calm down-"

"How am I supposed to calm down?" I sobbed.

"Well... I guess I don't know. But just take a deep breath and I'm sure you'll figure it out."

"Well, Dallas. The world isn't all cupcake and rainbows. How am I supposed to figure this out? Huh? I can't. It's inevitable."

"Alice-"

I cut him off. "Just get out! Get out!" I yelled. I shoved him out the door and locked it behind him.

I sunk to the ground as tears streamed down my face.

The next few weeks seemed to be the hardest weeks of my life. Since I'm only seventeen, they had to modify a lot.

I turned myself in and they knew of my job and assumed I was eighteen or older.

That came back to bite me in the ass.

I have a court date tomorrow and I had to think of everything myself. I have a lawyer. But it still felt like everything was on me.

I also get someone there with me appointed by the state to help me out, but the whole court thing didn't make much sense to me.

It was obvious they thought I was a psychopathic maniac who was carrying drugs and guns around. Which, I was. But I also called the police on myself. That was all I had.

I knew life was about to get really hard.

I sent a letter to the Curtis' and Marcus saying what's going on. I wrote in the Curtis' to show the letter to the guys. Otherwise it would just cost me more to send more letters. Figured I'd save the little money I have.

I felt my pride and disappear as I poured my thoughts out into the two letters. I was so embarrassed of myself. I couldn't bring myself to write an explanation in the letters. I just invited them to the court. Have them hear my humiliation and embarrassment in person from myself. It made the most sense.

Here's what I wrote to the Curtis'...

Hi.
It's Alice. And I've gotten myself in a bit of trouble. I'm sure you already know that by now, but save the date for November 1st at the court house. Not my proudest moment. But I guess it has to happen. I sent a letter to you three and Marcus. Show the guys too. I don't have the energy to waste on four more letters. Come if you'd like. I'm sure there's a lot of explaining to do and might as well cut out the middle man of you all hearing it from other people when you can hear it from myself.
Alice.