All For Show (COMPLETED)

Chapter 16

Chapter 16

There was an out of the country shoot for the anniversary cover kaya naman naging busy ako ng dalawang linggo. It was a welcomed distraction, too. I didn't want to dwell on the what ifs and the what could've beens—siya na rin ang nagsabi na torture lang sa sarili kapag iisipin ko pa iyong ganon.

Besides, may self-worth naman ako, noh. I texted him. He didn't reply. The silence on his end was so loud. Iyon na 'yon.

"Nakabalik ka na?" Jana asked.

"Yes," I replied as I yawned. My whole body felt tired from the nonstop working dahil gusto ko talaga na maging perfect 'yung anniversary edition namin. Ito iyong magiging legacy ko. I just wanted everything to be done according to my instructions.

"Dinner?" she asked.

I shook my head kahit na magkausap lang naman kami sa phone. "Tomorrow na lang," I replied. "Still tired."

Nagpaalam na ako kay Jana after that. Tahimik naman iyong buhay ko. Parang balik sa normal. Or siguro dahil lang 'to sa nag-deactivate ako ng Facebook account, although because of work, I had to make a new one. Halos wala nga lang akong friends doon dahil choosy ako. If you'll bring nothing but chaos into my life, the door is wide open and you can leave. I feel like tapos na ako sa part na gusto ko iyong exciting—parang mas maganda ngayon iyong love na secured lang. Kakapagod mag-overthink.

I also restricted Therese and my other cousins na naka-follow sa akin sa IG. Naka-hide din iyong stories ko sa kanila. Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit sila naka-follow, e. Magmemessage lang naman iyong mga pinsan ko if may nagcocomment na model or artista sa posts ko tapos magpaparinig if pwede ko ipakilala. Hindi ko alam kung bakit hindi nila ma-gets na hindi ko friends iyong mga iyon but it was for work. Ang unprofessional kaya ng nirerequest nila sa akin.

With all that being said and done, my life's at peace once again.

I wanted to sleep, but my system was still in another time zone. Ayoko naman na nakatingin lang ako sa ceiling. I decided to just go out and do groceries dahil upon checking, wala ng laman iyong ref and pantry ko.

I was wearing my comfiest sweatpants and my hair was in a messy bun. Kumuha ako ng cart because I knew that I'd be busy again after a few days to deal with the final details of our anniv issue. Wala na akong time mag-grocery nun.

I froze when I saw Pablo in the spices aisle. Dadaan lang sana ako roon para makarating sa Asian food nang makita ko siya. He was standing there, staring seriously at the rack of spices na para bang doon nakasalalay ang buhay niya. I debated for a while if I'd turn my heel back and just pretend na hindi ko siya nakita.

Pero bago pa man ako makapagdesisyon ay napatingin siya sa gawi ko. Naramdaman niya ba na may nakatitig sa kanya?

"Hey," pagbati ko nang makita niya ako. Ano pa ba ang mawawala sa akin? Nakita niya na ako? Besides, it's not as if sinundan ko siya rito. I mean, admittedly, it was a bit stalkerish nung puntahan ko siya sa bar niya at panoorin siya na parang creep doon sa parking lot. But today's a pure coincidence. I wasn't guilty of anything. Also, it's been quite a while na rin nung huli kaming nagkita.

"Hi," he replied with a small smile. It wasn't his usual smile. Bakit? Dahil awkward ba for him? Na alam niya na nag-text ako pero wala akong reply na natanggap?

"Forgot na rito ka nga rin pala nag-go-grocery," I said as casually as I could. Whatever happened in Bataan, apparently stays only in Bataan. Now, we're back in Manila. I seriously didn't know if we're friends or what. Acquaintances, perhaps?

"Yeah," he replied.

Tignan mo. Mukha kaming tanga ngayon. I was shifting on my feet. I wanted to leave because I was feeling the awkwardness creeping in.