SONGS OF OURSELVES

❦ philosophy

the sun falls over the mountain

you were my lifeline

it feels like a lifetime

ago

when we first met

i was out my head

and so were you

i can't imagine ever going back now

and i never want to see you turn your back now

but i know you wanted to

i know

you know

we know

this can't last forever

i know

❧  willow, "4ever"

Horse hooves and morning birdsong snapped Xosa out of his stupor. Sharp sunlight pierced his eyelids and forced him to contend with the remains of the day.

Xosa was stuck. In a metaphorical rut. Nothing about his situation had changed, he was still handcuffed to his nemesis, still banished from his home, still steadily leaking his godhood from his eyes, nose, and mouth.

And yet...

Xosa picked up on Sunkanmi's heartbeat, pounding strong and steady even with the foot of space between them, and cursed his rotten luck.

(blast.)

(she's still alive.)

The petty child within Xosa hoped she would die in her sleep or choke on an acorn when he wasn't looking, but she managed to survive the night.

(mercy, what is wrong with me?)

Sunkanmi brought out the worst in him without even trying. He hadn't expected to argue with her the night before, especially over a topic so... philosophical and distressingly mundane as unrequited love, but Xosa was almost certain he won the debate.

Strangely, the rare victory did nothing to improve Xosa's mood. During the Best Years of his Life, Telvi regularly advised Xosa to not go to bed angry, but Telvi was the angriest person he knew by a large margin, so maybe she was wrong on this one.

(space. i need some space.)

Still refusing to speak with Sunkanmi anymore than he absolutely had to, Xosa climbed up beside the cart driver in a huff. Their handcuffs clanked with the movement and the magic chain slackened as Sunkanmi rested in the carriage bed. She slept on her side, back to the wall. Severance lay beside her like a witch's broomstick, prepared to do her wicked bidding at a moment's notice.

Up front, Xosa made himself comfortable in the passenger seat and stretched out his long, lean legs. "Mind if I join you?"

"Ah, welcome!" The cart driver crowed, glad the death god would keep her company. "Had enough of the underworld?"