Behind the career || Stripper Au

14: the year is ending, Like my love for you.

Art cc: it's someone in Twitter I can't load they're user for some reason. Tho you can see they're like signature beside Hu Taos head in case you want to know :D

The year was ending, the students moments together were also. It was currently July and Childe had been away for months.. Zhongli distanced himself from everyone and Everything. Zhongli felt like everything was a chore now a days.

Zhonglis perspective:
School- boring
Life- boring
Friends- boring
Love life-
..
Love life- sucks

That's what I wrote back to Hu Tao on a paper note that she was passing forth and back to me I saw the shocked look on her face once she opened it. She looked at me with worry in her eyes. I have never seen her like this before. I have never seen any of my friends like this before.

They're all so worried about me, I'm not a kid you know. Am I not allowed to be sad because I messed up twice. First Childe left. Me and Baizhu tried but he was.. abusive in some type of way. That made us part ways after long discussions and law involvements. I still work for that bar tho, I don't know if I'm going to stay there much longer, everything seems to be too hard to do even the tiniest acts possible such as getting out of bed.
You may tell me "Zhongli you are depressed"

I won't believe you. "Zhongli always bounces back!" Is what my dad used to tell me. Keyword: used to. He's dead and my mom.. my mom is too old to possibly hurt me tho I'm still scared of her after what she did to me all those years ago. It was her who introduced me to such things as porn, drugs, and .. strippers.
Tho I'm still somewhat grateful that she atleast didn't starve me or kill me im general. She had multiple chances, which is why I believe there might still be some good inside of her even after everything.

"Zhongli class has ended." Ningguang said shaking me.
"I know and don't touch me" I said slapping her hand off. Beidou seemed oddly offended by that and even got up but ningguang only told her to calm down that it wasn't 'worth they're time'
I guess everyone really is becoming somewhat distant just because some stupid ginger left..
"Zhongli my bsf!!" Hu Tao said hugging me tightly.
"Hi." I said, she was the only person I tolerated now a days. Somehow, I thought she was annoying before and despised her somehow.

But now, it's different she's kind off the only thing keeping me away from deaths door.
"Hey! Cheer up! Yo my aunts parlour got a free spot! You need to try and get the job! That means we can work together in the future you know! Since I'm becoming the manager!!!" She said pointing at herself looking very excited and proud too..
"Uhm.." I said not sure what to answer or think about that.
"If you say so." I said still quite unsure.
"I promise you'll love it!! Everyone who works there are so joyful even tho is a funeral parlour.." she said.

"When are you becoming the manager?" I asked
"Right after we graduate!! Which means you'd still do the interview with my aunt but she really likes you and I bet you'd easy get the job. Your actually pretty much exactly the person we need!" She said.
"Ahh I see, why then tell your aunt I'm ready!"
"Yeah no you got to do stuff yourself such as reply to it and you know!" She said.
I simply did a proud pose and nodded at her.
"Better get to work then!" I said
"Zhongli we have history class before school ends you know?" She said.
"I knew that! I was testing you!" I said happily!

She giggled and dragged me into class, history class has got to be the most boring shit ever. But this one wasnt we were talking about Snezhnayas leader and how she's someone you wouldn't want to mess with. Tho all I could think about was Childe and wondering if he was happy now or if he was still thinking about me how I'm thinking about him every second of every minute of every hour of every day! I hope so, I really hope fate will bring us together again.

Before I knew it class was over, wow did I really just spend almost 2 hours thinking about some ginger that has probably forgot my name and how we met and has stopped loving me.. this is mentally and physically hurting me I can't keep up with this unrequited love for much longer. He DOESNT love me. I shouldn't love him back, so why do I long for him so much why do I miss those stupid flirty jokes, why do I miss.. his lips on mine.. why do I miss that one fucking make out session!?

I was mad but not at anyone more mad at myself for believing that someday he may come back and just show up at my door holding a bouquet of flower just asking me to marry him or some shit. And the fact that I make scenarios with him.. ugh, I think I might be going slightly crazy not that this isn't normal of course.

"Now dear roommate what may you be so busy writing?" Kazuha asked.
"I'm filling a work form application." I said taking only a quick glance at him.
"Funeral parlour I see, Hu Taos right?"
"Indeed" I said nodding at him.
"Well then I'll let you keep doing you're work and I wish you the best of luck mate." He said tapping my shoulder before turning around and leaving through the white painted door.

seconds, minutes, hours passed and I was finally done. Done with the form not with my thoughts about Childe. He keeps popping up in my mind like a popcorn machine pops the corn. I miss him, I never thought I'd say this about anyone or anything. But I only realised I loved him when he is gone. As I was writing in my diary of 210 pages. The last sentence I wrote in the last page was:
The year is ending, like my love for you dear Childe.

Short chapter sorry hehe btw the diary idea was from when Childe left till the current day. 16. December - 14. July. That's exactly 210 days :D