Louder than Bombs

Slipping

Yoongi knew what the situation was. He had anxiously kept tally of the days since he had gotten the first news.

Both Jin and Jimin had been reported missing five months ago. As each day passed, his spirits sank lower and lower. He had known Jin for so long - he considered him his best friend. Yoongi didn't want to imagine what had happened. He hadn't known Jimin for that long, but he had a fondness for him.

So far, he had managed to avoid getting drafted. He knew there were people who looked down on him and called him a coward. He knew people scoffed at the reasons that he gave as to why he hadn't joined.

But now as he thought about Jimin and Jin, he found himself questioning himself. If they had given everything - he hated assuming the worst - but then why couldn't he?

He spent his time doing what he could. He volunteered as much as he could. But try as he might, nothing felt enough.

--------

It was true that he had moved away. Hoseok's family had been torn apart. His parents were tired, stressed, and were barely keeping well. His old plans had been abandoned.

He did as much as he could. He took up whatever job he could find and tried to support himself. It was okay. He could fend for himself.

Three years ago, he distantly remembered meeting a group of soldiers who had been stationed at the nearby base. He had heard about the war going on. Hoseok hoped that they were doing well, that they hadn't gotten hurt, because they had made a huge impression on him.

He still remembered their names. There was a tall guy, Namjoon, he remembered. There was a Jimin, a Jin, and two others whose names he couldn't recall. He doubted he would ever see them again.

Hoseok still had the piece of paper where they had given him their numbers. Sometimes, he wanted them to call him, just so he would know that they remembered him. But they never did.

To them, he probably just was another silly little boy who liked to play soldier.

--------

The months kept ticking by. There were no news about Jin or Jimin. Jimin's parents were sure that he was dead. They hadn't heard about anyone being alive for long behind enemy lines and keeping up hope was exhausting. It was easier to resign.

The war raged on. More and more people from nearby got their unhappy news, about their family members and their friends being gone. At least that was easier to accept than the punishment of going "missing".

Jimin could be out there suffering, but nobody even knew where he was.

--------

"Hoseok?"

Hoseok nearly jumped out of his skin. He spun around at the sound of the familiar voice, and there he was, Yoongi. He looked older now, somehow. Then again, Hoseok probably did too. He had been a gangly fourteen-year-old when they had last talked, and now he was seventeen.

He looked much different.

Running against circumstances, they had met again at a train station in the night.

"Hyung?"

Yoongi took his arm. Slipped his fingers tightly around his wrist as if stopping him from running away.

"What's gotten into you?" he hissed.

"What?" Hoseok tried to snatch his hand away.

"Do you know how dangerous it is for kids like you to be out at this time of day?"

"I'm not a kid!"

Yoongi made no reply, only held Hoseok's hand tighter. The next train wasn't going to arrive for another two hours. Hoseok had been planning on waiting here, in the cold eerie station by himself. He needed to get back home. But Yoongi quickly dragged him towards the crosswalk. He was trying to take him back into the city.

No matter how hard Hoseok tried, he couldn't free himself from Yoongi's grip. He struggled to keep his pace after his brisk pace. Hoseok recognized some of the buildings that they went by. He used to live here. The army base. The memories. The friendships. He remembered.

He needed to get back home.

"Hyung, I need to-"

"It's the middle of the night, you shouldn't be out."

Hoseok wondered why Yoongi was out.

-------

Before long, Hoseok was ushered into Yoongi's home. It was exactly like he had remembered it. He was sent upstairs to take a hot shower - the first one in a while - and then dragged back downstairs for a hot meal.

He sulked about it. He could've gotten home quicker if it wasn't for Yoongi. His mom would be worrying. Hoseok wished he could call her.

But he said nothing of the sort to Yoongi's face.

"How are you these days, Hoseok?"

"I'm doing good," he said. He avoided looking into Yoongi's eyes, afraid that his lie would be seen.

"That's good to hear." Yoongi sighed. He stared at Hoseok carefully. The boy was much taller now, taller than him even. He was no longer as loud and carefree as he once had been. Yoongi could hear the hesitation in his speech. Time had passed.

"How are you?" Hoseok asked.

"I'm fine, I'm fine."

Hoseok nodded.

"What were you doing out at this time of day?"

"I have a job," he said quickly. "Unfortunately, I need to travel for it sometimes and the cheapest way to do it is by train and the one I take comes past midnight and therefore, I need to be... yeah..."

"Ah."

Hoseok took a deep breath. "If you don't mind me asking, what were you doing out?"

"Oh, me?" Yoongi asked. "I help out at the hospital most nights and sometimes it can end pretty late."

Hoseok nodded. For the first time, he noticed the dark circles around Yoongi's eyes. Did he ever get sleep? Had something gone wrong? The Yoongi he remembered had always been conscious about his health.

"You can stay overnight here if you want to," he said in a soft voice. "I'm not comfortable knowing that you sit alone in the station in the night like that."

Hoseok wanted to refuse. But he couldn't. Not when Yoongi looked so broken.

"Okay."

-------

this is taking so many turns istg

1029 words