The Autumn's Promise

Like every other usual day, I was sitting in the courtyard of my house enjoying my tea, the pen and the notebook from which most of the pages were torn off. As I was enjoying my tea, I heard someone was trying to open the front gate, I stood up and started walking towards the gate to open it and see who it is because I don't get visitors very often that too when it's very early in the morning. I opened the gate and I saw a man with a Khaki the outfit and a bag hanging on his right arm, I didn't knew this man, he was a total stranger to me. I asked him, do you need anything sir.
Stranger: Is this Mr. Tawheed's home?
Me: Yes, that's me, do you need anything sir?
Stranger: Hi, it's nice to meet you, I wanted to meet you from a long time.
I was shocked cause I didn't knew this man at all yet he was curious to meet me since so long, as I was thinking this he told me, I have something important to tell you, can I come inside? Yes why not, sorry I didn't ask you for that already, I replied and suddenly a cold feeling started to erupt from my heart travelling throughout my entire body, maybe it was the sign indicating the closing storm of grief I wasn't aware of. I told him to come inside, we both sat together and I offered him some tea, he gladly accepted it. I asked him, who are you, what's your name and it seems like you know me. Yes, but just a little he said looking at my notebook that was lying on the table, I noticed his face expressions changed, changed to a sad and pale looking face, the face that was glowing with happiness and full of energy a moment ago. I got worried and asked him, how do you know my name, and is everything alright? Ignoring the question, he asked me, is this the notebook you write your letters on everyday. I was shocked and asked him, how do you know that, considering the fact he knows my name and something like this, I got worried, not about myself but for someone else. There is only one person I write letters to and yes, this was exactly the notebook I write my letters on, that was the reason why the notebook was so thin.
I got lost as I started to remember two years ago...
It was the season of separation, it was Autumn, the leaves, without those a tree is said to die but, the tree itself makes them apart of itself so it can survive the harsh winter. How selfish can the nature be, doesn't the tree loves it's leaves, why doesn't it holds them so the wind can't blow them away from it. I was thinking this, while I was playing with the fallen leaves of the tree I was sitting below as I was waiting for her, the girl I used to think who loved me. After some time she came and as I saw her, I smiled a wide smile looking at her and my heart started to beat as fast as it could, just ike always. She sat down by my side, I got irritated and sad, because she knew I loved to see her dark, beautiful and deep as an ocean like eyes and to embrace her beauty with my eyes as she used to sit facing towards me everytime we were together, but today it was different, I  wondered why because she was the one who called me here in the first place. I can't do this anymore, she said as it didn't took her any long to tell me the reason why are we here. I couldn't understand at first what she was trying to say or rather, I didn't want to understand what she just said. What do you mean I asked her, she looked me in the eyes, everything started to get blurry and quiet, she looked more beautiful even before I don't know how but she did. I still remember that last glance I caught of her at that time. I felt something sharp stabbing my chest while I was busy watching her beauty as I only could hear the words I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE, and I came back to my senses, trying to understand and sum up what's happening. She stood up without saying anything else other than that. I stood up hurriedly as well. Why, what do you mean by not anymore, what about the promises you made, what about the dreams what about everything, I stammered and kept blabbering all this, with wet eyes. Taking a deep breath, trying to calm my eyes, I gathered some courage and asked her, be honest, did you ever loved me Juu? I used to call her by this nickname whenever I felt upset, she never noticed it though, actually a lot of things and I always used to wonder why. She kept quiet lowering her eyes. I got my answer for the question I just asked and answers to the many questions I never asked her. We will still be gold friends, you will always have a special place in my heart, she said with clear and bright dishonesty in her eyes. My heart got split into two, one telling me you always knew this was destined to happen, yes I thought, and one still trusting her, telling me this can't happen, yes I said to this one as well, agreeing to both of them I felt like that boat which is stuck in the middle of a river. Putting my faith in her lies again, knowing this all was just nothing more than an amusement to her, I said okay, cause deep down in my heart, I still trust her.
I will write you a letter everyday, and if not everyday then everytime I get a chance, I promise, will you? she asked me.
With a very short disappointed laugh, of course I said. The leaves trying so hard to stay on the branches, a cold breeze of wind came, as the tree didn't want them anymore the poor leaves couldn't do anything and fell, and without looking back she left. I looked up again taking a deep breath once again, where are you lost? he asked me  as I saw the man patting on my shoulder, I came back to my senses.
Shaking my head in nervousness I said nothing.
I asked him, what's wrong, is everything ok?. maybe  yes or maybe no, he replied. As he said that, i got more worried.We started to talk again.Me: What's your name, I don't know you?Him: That's not important, I wanted to ask you, what's your relation with the person you write all those letters to?
I got shocked again, now I lost count of how many times i got shocked today.Why, and how do you know that I write letters to someone, and do you know that person? I asked him with a lot of excitement.Because I am the man who takes your letters to her, and yes, I do know her kind off, he replied. So many questions to ask, yet all i asked him was, how is she? Is she alright? Is she happy? Do you get to see her? Is she healthy? I bombarded him with all these silly questions, but somehow he understood my situation. I didn't know why .Yes she is healthy and alright and yes, she has a lover too I think, I think this answers your other questions. He was older than me, his answers were short but always to the point and he said a lot using just a few words, his answers showed his experience. Just after he said she has a lover, I felt something sharp stabbing my heart, I managed to gather some courage somehow and ask him, how do you know that?I don't know if I was lucky that the man was so direct, without making me hope for anything, I have been working as a postman in that area for more than a year now. Since my first day working there, I drop two letters at her place, and I don't know why but she didn't take too long to get them, and he stopped talking. He started to look a bit nervous and upset, I asked him what's wrong, as I was so excited to hear the rest of the story, because it's been so long since I heard anything about her, I think she wrote my address wrong on those letters she promised to write. He asked me if I am free tomorrow or not. I got so frustrated as I was so eager to know the rest, but I kept my cool and said yes. He said something, something that I didn't expect. It has been more than two years  since I went through her streets, long before we last met in that Autumn.I used to visit that street of her's so I can catch a glimpse of her, and tomorrow I am going there again, I don't know why, but that's what the postman asked me if i am free tomorrow or not, he asked me to drop letters at her place with him. As he stood up to leave, I tried to ask him his name again, but he still didn't tell me his name. He left and I came back, sat down with so many memories coming back in my head like everything had just happened yesterday. I took the pen and started to write her a letter, as i couldn't since the postman came.  As I finished writing, I tore the page from the notebook I was writing on. The day passed,thinking about her and why he asked me to come there. It was about 7 am when I left my home and started walking towards the place he was going to meet me at, the sky was flooded with dark clouds, it can start to rain heavily anytime. After some time when i reached there the postman was already there waiting for me. Waheed, he said looking at me, my name is waheed and took a letter out of his bag that was hanging down by his shoulder, the bag was ful of letters, and the one he took out was on top of them. Its yours, he told me, its the one you wrote her yesterday. So, whats with it? I asked him and he took another letter out of his bag saying this one is from her lover, it doesn't come often like yours but once in a long time and that's why I came to you yesterday as this letter arrived a day before that, but I didn't drop it at her place so I could meet you and tell you what I wanted to tell you from a long period of time he said. So what do you want to tell me I asked him. The letter is probbaly from her lover, I don't know exactly but I Just  have a feeling that tells me its from her love. Why do you think like that? There is a chance I could be her lover, because you just said this letter doesn't come often but you send one daily, that should make more sense right? I asked him and he gave me a short sarcastic laugh and a smile. You will see why I think like that, he said and we started to walk towards her house. As we walked towards her house he started to tell me a lot of things about him, like how he used to love a girl who had left her a long time ago and he still used to lover her till  the day he got married. I still miss her and think about her sometimes he said  with sadening tone, I felt his words, those words felt like they pinched me. I put my arm around him and borught him close to me while i was laughing at him and i started to tease him. Ahha my man has been a hardcore lover huh, lowering my eyeboows giving him a funny look. He started to laugh and said, yes, yes in my younger days when i was just a stupid like you and he laughed again, HUH WHAT I asked as i started to laugh with him and just like that as we were busy teasing eachother, we reached our destination. Waheed took a deep breath and took out both letters and said, what you are going to see is what has been happening since I took the job as a postman here a year ago. I got worried again, I felt the same feeling that I felt yesterday when Waheed told me he wants to talk to me about something. He told me to stay here, I don't want you to face her. I got irritated, but I was happy too, thinking I will get to Juu once again, just like the days I used to come here and catch a glimpse of her. The road wasn't busy at all no cars or people where passing by as it was early and too cloudy. Waheed started to walk towards her house, this moment felt so long, if felt like waheed wasn't even walking, I felt like the two years i lived without seeing her were getting repeated once again. After a long time, atleast that's how I felt, Waheed reached there, in a matter of seconds Juu came rushing towards him as it was like she was waiting for him. She was looking beautiful, her long hair, dark eyes, puffed cheeks, she looked more beautiful than the last time we met in that Autumn. My heart started to race ao fast and loud, i could feel it throbbing in my chest. I smiled as my heart began to wonder was she waiting for my letter?  Is this what Waheed wanted me to show, that Juu still loves me and again my heart started to wonder, where are the letters she promised to write to me? As i was lost in my hopeful thoughts Waheed took the envelope from his bag and gave it to her, she started to burst with joy, her smile got bigger and wider God she looked so beautiful and she put that envelope close to her chest, a sharp pain started to burst in my chest when she did that as i saw that envelope wasn't mine. She turned away and started to walk back to her house, Waheed called her back maybe saying you have another letter, as she came back and took that in her hand, my chest felt like a dull knife was cutting through it causing too much pain as it wasn't able to cut through it smoothly as i saw her joy, that smile, everything vanishing from her face. She walked a bit away from her gate to where there was a narrow drainage canal and took the letter both in her hands whil still holding onyo the other one she tore it down into pieces and threw it near to that narrow drainage canal.
My eyes got filled with tears as she started to walk into her house and Waheed started to come back, i felt rain drops on my face as i was looking at the sky so Waheed won't see me in such condition. The rain started to fall heavily it felt as it was mourning my love. I remembered something and ran towards the drainage canal to pickup the torn pieces of that letter, as i was getting closer to it the rain was getting more and more violent, as i reached there and bent down to pickup the pieces a tide of rain water washed away the remaining pieces that were left. Heh, a painful sarcastic laugh escaped from my lips, I looked up asking God what and when did i do something wrong and Waheed wrapped his arm around me just like the way i did earlier and we started to walk away. We stopped at the stationery store as i had told Waheed i need to buy something, we finished shopping and it was still raining down heavily. We stopped by a tea stall to have sit and wait for the rain to stop, we were soaked wet and cold in the rain as we didn't had an umbrella.
As we both were taking sips from our tea cups Waheed Asked Me.
Waheed: So this new notebook, what is it for? Will you still write her letters?
Me: Yes, i will keep my promise even if she didn't, but don't worry I won't be sending them to her, I don't want to he the reason of taking her smile away from her every morning.
Waheed: Ah ok as he took another sip of the tea.
And besides I also don't want to be the reason of jamming her colony's drainage system hahaha. I said laughing and Waheed started to laugh as well.
By the way Waheed, i also understand why you wanted me to show this, i said.
Why, he asked surprisingly.
Me: So you will have less work to do. Hahaha...
Waheed: You moron.
Hahaha, we both laughed...