late for the love of my life

ch. 10

It took months until Sapnap was able to get George to come clean.

Over that course of time, George retracted into himself, feeling listless, holed up in his home office as he watched the days pass with dull eyes. It was the only place, he said, had the solace he needed, though George failed to explain why he craved the oppressive solitude.

Sapnap didn't know what the cause of this extreme mood change was, letting it slide in the hope that this was temporary, maybe brought on by trouble at work or a simple slump in life. Though, fear started to build as George stayed the same, refusing to heed any of Sapnap's comfort.

He would hold his breath, rapping softly at George's firmly shut door, seeing no light peek out from the frame, no indication of life inside.

George would let him in, ignoring Sapnap's worried tone, the insistence that George needed to get out of this dark room, to please tell him what was going on.

"I'm just tired," George would croak as he always did, even he not understanding this mood himself, how it only worsened harshly a couple weeks ago, flaring up and consuming him whole.

Sapnap would sigh, eyes flicking up to notice with dark, humorless amusement that George was keeping a plant alive better than he was himself.

He would leave, George would crawl into bed much later, and Sapnap would reach out for him, finding his body cold.

Finally, the flood gates opened.

Sapnap laid a firm hand on George's shoulder, the other shrinking against the touch, knowing that Sapnap was no longer going to be patient, no longer going to let this continue.

George had avoided it, brushed off the gnawing ache inside him that goaded him to spill, to release all the pent up emotions he felt like he had no choice to keep inside, trying to spare Sapnap.

But, he couldn't. It was killing him.

"What's wrong, George?" Sapnap asked, soft, but with careful reproach, "I need to know, to help you, whatever it is. I don't care if it's something that could hurt me to hear, just please stop shutting me out."

George sunk his head in his hands and broke down, telling Sapnap everything.

He confessed he met this other soulmate, Dream, last spring, crying as the truth came out, what he had hidden from the other for so long poured out in an unending ramble.

Sapnap listened, rubbing George's back in comforting strokes as the story unraveled in full.

The recount of how they met, George in complete shock when seeing Dream gave him sudden color, how they talked, meeting in secret. How George didn't understand why any of this was happening, choking out that he wished it didn't happen.

George swore vehemently he never wanted to do anything to hurt Sapnap, saying with eyes squeezed shut that he told Dream in the very beginning he already had a soulmate, and Dream would only ever be his friend.

Well..

That's what George intended.

He knew he made a mistake, biting his lip in shame at the next action, the one that ended it all between him and Dream. George had a sense of conviction, that if Sapnap never forgave him, he understood. It was his own fault, he knew he deserved it, that's what George had been preparing himself for, that Sapnap would hear this whole story and decide to be done with him.

That's why George avoided it for as long as he could stand, knowing he threw years of happiness with Sapnap away with one foolish misstep, the one he knew would come to pass as soon as he gave Dream his phone number.