This is a story I wrote last year because I was bored. It is written in a weird format kind of like a play because I was too lazy to write an actual story. I initially just wrote this to send to my friends because I found it funny but some people ac...
Dawn- "Are you guys excited about my cat themed Xmas party at my house tonight?"
Adiso- "Yes but we still need to hire someone for the music."
Gabbi- "Ohhhhhhhhhhh I know just the lady, her name is Martha and she is an AMAZING singer. She is also my Ex husbands dog's cousin, so we are super close."
Ned Carste- "Wait you have an EX husband!?! You're 13!!!!!"
VEVA- "I wanna hear the story behind this...."
Gabbi- "Are you saying you don't remember my wedding with Bobby the parrot fish!"
Dawn- (Said in a rather sarcastic voice)"Ahhh yes Bobby, how could we possibly forget about him. I suppose if you are sure Martha will do a good job at my party, you can call her and tell her she got the job."
Addiso- "Dawn... You might want to reconsider that I just googled her and this is her profile picture on her website:"
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Gabbi - " Too Late I already called her and she is on her way here now!"
Dawn- (Trying desperately to rid her mind of that horrifying and scary picture.) "I suppose pictures aren't everything, let's just hope she is less of a psychopath than she looks...for the mental state of all my friends that are not crazy like Gabbi."
Ned Carste- "Yes lets hope.."
VEVA- "Uhhhhh Gabbi there is the car of your distant relative, you might want to go tell her to stop trying to drive up the snowdrift onto the roof."
Gabbi- (Runs after the car of Martha who is now trying to park her car on the roof.)
Dawn- "Oh no I am regretting my life choices just about now."
Meg- (Shows up in a HUGE Uhaul truck) "Bryn.. the cat delivery service sent your Uhaul truck filled with cats to my hotel room, and I just got a call from my mom saying that five hundred boxes of cat leashes where just delivered to my house in Hawaii..."
Dawn- "Nooooooooo! Those cat leashes were supposed to be shipped to my cat themed wearhouse in Hawaii! How did they even get your address?!?
Martha- ( Drives her car, which no one knows how she got since her drivers licence was taken away after she drove her car up the stairs of the eiffel tower and launched her car off after she got to the top.) "Yo Yo Yo I really like snow. I have a friend and her name is NO her number is NO the answer is NO!!!!!!!!!!"
Ned Carste- "Yeah that's great Martha..."
Martha- "Itz Lil Piggie to you peasants!"
Meg- (Whispers to herself) "I wanna hear more about this "NO" lady, she sounds interesting."
Martha- "If you wanna hear about NO you better know that she once killed a disabled crow!"
Dawn- "Martha you're fired!"
Martha- "Unfortunately you did not see, my contract is under warranty, meaning you cannot fire me."
Dawn- "Gabbi do something she's your crazy relative!"
Gabbi- "My name is NO my number is NO and the answer is NO!!!!"
Addiso- "So much for your annoying optimism, welcome to the dark side my child!"
Martha- "The only other person who has ever said that was my dear friend NO, she was where I learned it from."
Meg- "Waiiiit.... what if that is actually NO and she is just disguised as Gabbi and is really good at being ~INCOGNITO~!"
VEVA- "Megan I really doubt..."
NO disguised as Gabbi- "That's a new record of longest time to figure out I was disguised as your friend. Congratulations you took even longer than the lab rats."
Ned Carste - "WHAT LAB RATS?!
NO disguised as Gabbi- "Your younger siblings, and the rats that live in the sewers of London, who are more dignified than the siblings."
Addiso- "If you are NO, then what happened to the actual Gabbi?"
NO disguised as Gabbi- "Last time I saw her she was being abducted by aliens."
VEVA- "And you did not think to help her?"
NO disguised as Gabbi- "NO, the first thing that came to my mind was to steal her car, and her identity."
Martha- "That's messed up even for me."
Dawn- "We have to go find her, she was going to deliver my cat themed cake to my cat themed party! WHAT IS A CAT THEMED XMAS PARTY WITHOUT A CAT CAKE!!??"
Addiso- "I think we should just leave her because she was the idiot who got herself abducted by aliens, plus I need some help smuggling snails across the border."
Ned Carste - " As much as I would love to spend my day trying to sneak across the state lines, I think we need to find Gabbi, NO where did you last see her."
NO- (Takes off her Gabbi disguise) "Last time I saw her she was trying to connect her TV to a projector so she could watch TV on the wall of her house."
VEVA- "Sounds like something she would do, then what happened."
NO- "Then she got distracted projecting The 100 on her dog, and a spaceship just flew over her and picked her up with a laser beam while yelling about how they needed to take her back to her home planet, PLANET DEATHTRAP."
Meg- "I'm all for a vacation. Does anyone have access to a spaceship?"
Martha- "Yes I keep one under my mattress at all times as well as my portable Mr, Miagi."
Dawn- "I am not even going to question that after all that has happened today, but let me remind you we have to be back on Earth tomorrow for my cat themed Xmas party."
Addiso- "Alright then, even though I would prefer to go buy some illegal snails, it looks like we are going to PLANET DEATHTRAP!"
You should be confused, and concerned. Anyways I hope you enjoyed it and there is plenty more where that came from so I will probably publish those at some point in time if people read this...
