Friends Don't Let Friends Have Mullets

Danny Rand was many things.

Calm.

Soft spoken.

("A fortune cookie."

"You do know those are American, right?"

But contrary to belief, he was not a morning person.

Back in K'un Lun, he'd gotten about 6 hours of sleep on weekdays, and 8 hours on weekends, since the rigorous training demanded that he should be prepared to spend long periods of time without rest.

("Isn't meditation just closing your eyes and trying not to fall asleep?"

"Sam you moron-")

Sleepily, Danny tugged the covers away from his face, reveling in the sunshine streaming in through the partially opened curtains.

Today was a late start, which meant that Principal Phil Coulson accidentally got his jacket stuck in the vending machine, but all the kids were told that the staff were having a meeting.

He stood up and stretched, turning around to wake Peter, but frowned when he realized the brunette wasn't in his bed.

Huh. Weird.

The blond headed into the washroom, brushing his teeth, and taking a shower, using his iron fist to heat up the water.

(Ava had nearly cried tears of joy when she realized Danny could heat things up with his hands, leading to the entire team getting warm back massages at least once every month.

And that conversation led to the team heckling Peter when he inadvertently let slip that Johnny Storm apparently also had really warm hands.

And that had led to:

"YOU LIKE HIM!"

"SHUT UP BUCKETHEAD!")

Shaking himself out of his thoughts, Danny pulled on his faded navy blue graphic-hoodie that Ms. Parker ("Danny, I told you to call me Aunt May-") had given him for Christmas. It had the words "MULLETS ROCK" written on it in bright red and blue letters.

Danny headed downstairs, snagging his SHIELD-issued communicator watch from his bedside table as he did so.

When he stepped into the living room, he was met by the disapproving faces of Peter, Ava, Luke, and Sam.

All wearing identical sweatshirts that said "Friends don't let friends have mullets."

Um.

("It was Sam's idea."

"Woah, Webhead, you were in on it too!"

"Only because you said you would stop making fun of me and Johnny if I helped you."

"Peter and Johnny sitting in a car, are they kissing, yes they AAAAAHHH AVA HELP ME!"

"I told you not to bother him.")

Well...Peter and Ava were honestly the only ones maintaining a straight face at this confrontation.

Luke was visibly hiding a snicker behind his palm, and Sam was unsurreptitiously recording the whole thing on his phone.

Danny side-eyed them, moving to grab a papaya from the refrigerator. "Is this an intervention?"

Ava sighed. "Babe, you need a haircut."

The blond took a step back, pouting.

("How does a seventeen year old manage to pout?"

"I don't know, Luke. How does Peter keep giving us puppy eyes?"

"Because I'm adorable, Ava.")

"Dudes, I don't need a haircut," protested Danny.

Peter sighed. "Danny. The mullet looks ridiculous. And I've seen ridiculous, considering half my crazies are fashionably challenged."

("I don't think they're that insane."

"Sam, the Green Goblin wears purple armor over green skin, and Kraven fights commando."

"Okay, ew, I really did not need to know that.")

Iron Fist crossed his arms. "Hair is the crown you never take off, so we must wear it wisely," he quoted, taking a bite out of his papaya, and swallowing.

Ava pulled her dark hair back into a ponytail, shaking her head reluctantly. "I was really hoping it wouldn't come to this. Get 'im, boys."

Danny dropped his cool composure and shrieked as Sam and Luke tackled him to the ground, holding his flailing arms and legs down.

("Danny, you smacked me in the face!"

"Every action has an equal and opposite reaction!")

Peter and Ava approached him with scissors, and made quick work of his ducktail, cropping his blond hair short.

Danny stared at himself in the television screen in horror.

"Morning kids!" sang Aunt May from the kitchen. Ava quickly shoved the hair clippings behind the couch with her foot.

"Good morning, Aunt May!" they chorused, like angels who had absolutely never done anything wrong in their lives. Ever.

May kissed Peter's cheek before patting Danny's hair. "I like the haircut, dear."

Once May had left the room, the teenagers (minus Danny) burst into laughter.

"Oh god, I've gotta make this video my Insta status," howled Sam, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes.

The teens were all caught off guard when their watches went off simultaneously, holographic projections of Nick Fury popping up from the display.

"Need I remind you that school starts in 5 minutes?" he barked.

The five teens scrambled to get out the door, Danny grumbling loudly all the way, forced to take off his hoodie since it was no longer applicable.