November 29th, 1974

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Dear Diary,
Oh my, I am so in love with Sniper, I wish he would kiss me and hold me and make out with me! Oh how much I wish he would do that, I would do anything for his hot body!! Oh and his thick accent drives me CRAZY!!! I wish I could just listen to it all the time. I have made t-shirts and posters and a whole fan club for him!! And I am his number one fan (considering I am the only one in it) who wants him the most!! I even have strands of his hair!! I freak out whenever I get to touch his hat because it has touched him!!! I'm just so obsessed!!

Just kidding, this is Spy. Take this as a warning to never leave your diary right on top of your bed, FemScout. Also take note that I know your deepest, darkest secret about Sniper.

Au revoir,
RED Spy

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