Red vs blue (female OC) season 2

Dealer Incentive

Tucker and Caboose have Donut and Thea surrounded inside the blue base.

Tucker: So, they send two female assassin's to try and kill us. Clever, but it won't work. We're immune to your feminine wiles. ...Unless you two wanna date one of us.

Thea: Haha! They think your a girl.

Tucker: Quite!

Punch's Thea in the stomach.

Thea: Ow!

Donut: Female?! I'm not a Girl

Tucker: Tease.

Donut: I just have, light red armor.

Caboose: How is that pink armor anyway? Looks comfortable...

Donut: At first, I really hated it. But it's kinda grown on me. My old armor used to chafe my thighs somethin' aweful. But the crotch in this pink one is surprisingly roomy!

Tucker: Silence woman!

Thea: He's a Dude!

Tucker: I said silence!

Hits her again.

Cut to Sarge addressing Simmons and Grif.

Sarge: Good Bhudda's noodle, how could this have happened?

Simmons: It's okay sir. It was a strong plan, Grif's just a dumbass.

Grif: Hey, I'm using your cerebral cortex.

Sarge: Settle down, ladies. We need a new strategum, and we need it fast.

Simmons: Donut's sure to crack under the pressure and reveal everything. But Thea is pretty tough though.

Grif: Everything like what, where we keep his tampons? Oh, wait.

Sarge: You're right about that, Simmons. The boy doesn't even see the entertainment value in being tortured and Thea would probably kill all of them! Oh these kids today!

Church enters the blue base with Tucker waiting for him.

Church: How's it goin', Tucker? We get any useful information outta the prisoner's yet?

Tucker: I figured they were here to steal back Lopez, but the girl won't give us anything and the guy too... except a list of crock pot recipes. Would that be useful?

Church: Do we have a crock pot?

Tucker: No, Caboose made a trade with that annoying guy from Blue Command. He swapped it for a mystery box.

Church: What was in the mystery box?

Tucker: A hundred and forty jars of mayonnaise.

Church: ...well that's a good trade...

Tucker: Yeah it doubles as a great sunscreen.

Church: How did you- never mind. Listen, I think I came up with a plan for how we can use Lopez and our new prisoner's to get an upper hand on the reds...

Tucker: ...

Church and Tucker: ...

Church: The plan does not involve mayonnaise.

Tucker: Dammit, I knew there would be a catch.

Camera zips around to another part of the blue base, where Caboose, Thea and Donut are.

Caboose: Okay Mia! Your turn!

Thea: Caboose, my name is Thea.

Caboose: Those aren't the words Mia.