Collected Philippine Short Stories

Why Women Wash The Dishes | Filomena N. Colendrino

In the town of Santa Rosa there once lived a couple named Hugo and Imelda. Every mealtime they quarreled over the chore of washing the dishes. Imelda would scold Hugo if he refused to wash the dishes. Sometimes she would become angry and call him names, and if he talked back she would get the coconut midrib broom and chase him with it. He would run to the house of his compadre and hide there till his wife's anger had passed.

The neighbors familiarly called Imelda, Ka Maldang, and Hugo, Ka Ugong.

One day just as they were finishing their lunch, Ka Ugong announced: "I'm not going to wash the dishes anymore." He threw out his chest and lifted his chin.

"Who says so?" asked Ka Maldang, holding up her chin, higher than his.

"I say so; I worked so hard in the field this morning. I'm not going to wash any dish."

Ka Maldang stood up and with her arms akimbo, she glared down at Ka Ugong across the table. She was at Ka Ugong across the table. She was a big woman. Her arms were stout. Her voice was also big. "Ad who, Mister Hugo, is going to wash these dishes?" she asked.

Ka Ugong's chest sank again. His chin also went down. He held on the edge of the table nervously.

"You!" he said in a much lower tone. "You are the woman. You should do all the housework."

"And what do you do?" asked Ka Maldang. "You tie the carabao to the reeds in the field and then you lie down on the grass to watch it graze. You call that hard work? I cook, clean the house, wash your clothes, I scrub the floor, I do all the work that only slaves should do. And yet, you even refuse to help me wash the plate which you have eaten!" Ka Maldang's voice was now raised to a high pitch and her tears posed on her eyelids at Ka Ugong and at her broom. She grabbed the broom. She raised the broom to strike him, crying, "You, you, you lazy man!"

Ka Ugong ducked under the table, "Don't" he cried. "Don't strike me!"

"Come out from under the table, you coward!" ordered Ka Maldang.

"Lay down your broom," said Ka Ugong.

"All right, all right. Come out." Ka Maldang put her broom behind the door.

Ka Ugong returned to his seat opposite her at the table.

"What have you to say?" asked Ka Maldang, wiping her eyes.

"Let's stop quarreling over the plates. Let's have a wager. The first one of us who will speak after I'd said 'Begin' will wash the dishes. Always"

"Only that?" said Ka Maldang. "The first one who talks will always wash the plates, and bowls, and pots and pans. Always."

"Right," said Ka Ugong. "If you ever say just one word to me or to anybody, or to anything after I had said 'Begin', you will always wash the dishes."

"That's easy. I can keep my mouth shut even for a week. You can't. You even talk to your carabao."

"All right, are you ready?" asked Ka Ugong.

Ka Maldang sat upright in front of him across the table. She nodded her head, compressed her lips, and Ka Ugong said "Begin."

They both fell silent. They sat at the table looking at each other across the unwashed plates and bowls and spoons. They did not like to leave each other for fear that one would talk to himself without the other's hearing. They sat there just staring.

Soon the cat began to mew for its food. Neither Ka Maldang nor Ka Ugong paid attention to its mewing. The cat jumped upon the drying dishes to lick the leftovers. Ka Maldang did not drive the cat away. Neither did Ka Ugong. The cat licked the pot and pan on it, overturned a kettle, spilled its contents, then went to lie down under the table. Ka Ugong pretended that nothing had happened. He continued to sit still, and so did Ka Maldang.