A Totally Uncanon Sidetrip Because Jael's a Girl

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It had been a month, a month!, of traveling by horse through forests, mountains, etc. Jael was out of her meager batch of supplies. It's not like I knew that I'd be traveling for a minimum of six months!!! I thought it'd just be three days. My cabin had all the stuff I could have possibly needed!!!

As such, on one particularly fine day--the sun was gently shining down, the lake nearby sparkled, the birds sung sweetly--Jael woke up in a foul mood. "How close are we to the nearest village?"

Fili, the nearest one, replied. "Uh, five hours journey, I guess."

She nodded, "Uh huh, and, uh, are we going to stop at said village?"

Thorin spoke up majestically, his words successfully enraging her. "No. Our supplies have not run out, and-"

She held up a hand, "I'm gonna stop you right there. We are going to stop there, or you're going to have one less party member."

All of the dwarves, and Gandalf, turned to look at her, confused. She rolled her eyes. "If I remember correctly, and I do, I told you that I needed to get supplies that only women would need, right?" Her taut voice showed how strained she felt, having to remind them that she was a girl and that she had different needs than they did!

Thorin clearly didn't get it. "Can't you just use something from the woo-"

"Thorin, you may be a future King, but if you finish that sentence, you won't have to wonder if the dragon will kill you, because I will kill you!" His mouth closed with a snap, and she relaxed a little.

"Now look. I'm in pain, and I'm out of supplies. I didn't even mention my last cycle to you guys at all, so the least you could do is be a tiny bit sympathetic and guide me to the village!"

Thorin still clearly did not want to go, and Dwalin, stubborn Dwarf that he was, backed his king up.

Jael took a very deep, very long breath. "Okay. Okay. We can do this the easy way, or the hard way."

Kili piped up, "What's the easy way?"

"You take me to the village." She smiled at the teenager--well, he certainly wasn't an adult because Dwarves became adults at 85! Therefore he had to be a teenager....sort of.

Tentatively, Ori asked, "And the hard way?"

"I currently feel as if there are metal shards destroying my insides, and I'm bleeding profusely. I'll allow you to feel the same so that we have to go to the village." Seeing their terror/revulsion/disbelief, she laughed. "Nah, I'm just kidding. Your future king just won't ever have any heirs besides his nephews, that's all."

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Long story short, Gandalf convinced them that they should forgive her angry words that came from pain, and they brought her to the village, where he gave her a pouch of money. "This should be enough to buy what you need, Jael."

She grinned wanly. "Thanks, Gandalf." Then she walked away....okay, so she was hobbling. Let a girl have some dignity.

Asking a woman for directions, she soon made her way to an herbalist's store, where she collapsed as soon as she entered. A woman, who, for once, was shorter than her, looked up, saw her, and clicked her tongue in sympathy. "Oh, you poor dear."

Quickly, she flitted around the store, gathering herbs, and mushing them together into a paste before forming them into little pills to make them easier to swallow. Bringing a cup of tea and the pills to Jael, she handed them to her, watching her swallow them with nary a second thought.

You've reached the end of published parts.

⏰ Last updated: Feb 09, 2021 ⏰

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