Shrek: Once Upon A True Love's Kiss [Book 1]

Chapter 05: The Rescue Mission!

Chapter 05: The Rescue Mission!

*Alice's POV*

We left the town of DuLoc, as reluctant as I was because I really wanted to play the welcome booth thing again and sing along to it.

It was so cute~

We're now quite a bit of a distance away from the kingdom, currently walking through a field of beautiful giant sunflowers.

I was walking next to Donkey when he brought about the subject about the quest. "Okay, let me get this straight. You're gonna go fight a dragon and rescue a Princess, just so Farquaad will give you back a swamp, which you only don't have because he filled it full of freaks in the first place. Is that about right?"

"I wouldn't necessarily call them freaks exactly..." I mumbled.

Shrek sighed. "You know what? Maybe there's a good reason why donkey's shouldn't talk."

"But he does actually make a fair point." said Zero.

Shrek threw some corn away while Donkey spoke again. "I don't get it. Why don't you pull some of that ogre stuff on him. You know, throttle him, lay siege to his fortress." He was now walking next to Shrek, who took a huge bite of an onion, while I stayed back to admire the sunflowers as we walked. "Grind his bones to make your bread, the whole ogre trip."

"Maybe because there is a very big chance that he'll end up locked away in a dungeon for the rest of his life." Zero pointed out.

"Oh, I know what!" Shrek turned to Donkey. "Maybe I could have decapitated an entire village and put their heads on a pike, gotten a knife, cut open their spleen and drink their fluids. Does that sound good to you?"

"Uh...no, not really." Donkey shook his head. "No."

I visibly cringed. "That doesn't sound good to me, either. It sounds absolutely vile."

Zero chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. "Eh, that doesn't sound so bad. Could be worse."

I stared at the back of Zero's head in disgust. "You are absolutely disgusting, Zero. What could be any worse than that?"

"For your information, there's a lot more ogres than people think." Shrek pointed out.

"Example?" Donkey asked, intrigued.

Shrek looked confused. "Example?" He stopped walking, making the three of us stop as well. "Okay, um...ogres are like onions."

Donkey sniffed the onion Shrek was holding. "They stink?"

"Yes...no!" Shrek yelled.

I giggled. "Kinda like Zero after he climbs a few trees just to get to your house, even though he literally lives across the street."

He glanced behind me and glared. "Hey! I have you know, that is the sweet smell of nature, not onions."

I tilted my head to the side. "Then why don't you rub one of these pretty sunflowers on you so you can smell like nature?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Alice. That's just weird."

"Not as weird as you climbing trees just to get to my place, when you could've just walked there. Just saying." I practically sang at the end.

"...Whatever."

Anyway, going back to Donkey trying to guess how ogres are apparently similar to onions...."Oh, they make you cry?"