Their Moon

Chapter 11- Minor Outburst

And some days you just need to stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself "I need to get my shit together. I need to clean my mess" and maybe on some days that is the best you can do and that is enough.

THIRD PERSON'S POV

Moon and Enzo were sitting in Enzo's room. While all the other boys were busy with their work.

"So, you wanted to talk about something?" Moon asked Enzo trying to avoid any eye contact with him

"Moon" Enzo called her out in an attempt to make her look at him

"Yeah," Moon said looking right behind him and avoiding any sort of eye contact with him

"Love, look at me" Moon bought her eyes up to him

"They're nothing to be ashamed about, love," Enzo said with a smile

"I am not ashamed!" Moon said in a defensive tone

"You are not?" Enzo asked with a tone 'I know you are'

"No, I am not ashamed, Enzo" Moon said trying to control her irritation and taking her gaze away from his face

"Look at me, Moon" Enzo again said with an authoritative tone knowing that sometimes you need someone to take control of you so that for a while you don't have to do anything on your own

Moon couldn't help but comply

"There is nothing to be ashamed about, I am your brother and you are allowed to fall back on me. On us." Enzo said giving a squeeze to her hands which were clenched into a tight fist "Let yourself go, for once and you'll see how many people are there for you"

Moon snatched her hands back "Just because I had a moment of weakness yesterday you think you are allowed to touch me?! No, you are not! And for the last time, I am not ashamed. You might be my brother but I no more believe in this 'I am here for you crap' because love last time I checked you guys were not there for past 20 years of my life. I know what I have been through. I know how many time I have cried myself to sleep wishing that maybe, just maybe there will be someone to hold me, someone I can open up to and you know what?! The moment I opened up to those people who used to say 'I'll be there for you' they turned their back on me! I cried, I begged and did everything in my power to keep them with me but they left! So, I am sorry love but I don't need you or anyone for that matter. Remember I am here because for now, I don't have a place to live. I am very much an adult and I am free to live on my own but for now, I don't have a place. The minute I will have a place of my own I am fucking out of here. " With that Moon got up and left Enzo's room.

MOON'S POV

I am so done with my bullshit. The dude was trying to help me and I snapped at him. What the fuck is wrong with me.

You are so pathetic. As I have told you earlier, you hurt people who try to be there for you, who try to help you. You pathetic piece of shit.

I try to ignore whatever these stupid thoughts are saying. I went to my room. I took out my book and start reading. Sometimes only reading can help me take my mind off things.

I can't even focus on reading. Aaagghh why did I snap at him? Let me see how I have fucked things up in just a few days.

1. They got to see my breakdown

2. They saw my scars and cut. Fuck! They saw me hurting myself.

3. Instead of being grateful to the guys for letting me stay I behaved like an ungrateful bitch.

Now, I will have to apologise to him. I can't stand myself with what I have done.

I went to Enzo's room but he wasn't there so I decided to go back and check-in a while.

I went to his room after a few hours. I knocked on my door but when no one replied I entered the room. The room was dimly lit.

I stopped on my track when I saw a figure on the floor near the bed.

"Enzo?" I called him out not wanting to startle him.

Instead, I heard a sniff

"Enzo, are you okay?"

No answer

I went up to him and touched his shoulder he flinched back as if my touch made holes in his body. 

well ouch!

now I understand why people feel bad when you flinch back from their touch. 

"hey, hey Enzo" I tried to pacify him "it's me, Moon" he did not say anything just  stayed in his position 

"Are you okay? What's wrong? Are you crying?" I just rambled 

Was he crying because of what I said to him? Fuck! I am such a rotten tomato. 

For once in your life do the right thing 

Wow! Do you know how to say the right things as well?

I decided to do something I have stopped doing a long time ago, comforting people. 

I took his face in my hands and made him look at me. Both my hands were holding his face and my thumb was wiping the tears that were continuously falling. 

"Talk to me," I said in a firm tone 

"I am sorry, Moon," he said bringing his glossy eyes up to me "I have missed you every single day of my life. Every second of every day. I don't want you to leave. Not now, not ever. I am sorry we could not find you. I am sorry we found you only when your uncle died but believe me, Moon, we did everything in our power to find you. I don't even know if whatever I am saying is making any sense to you. I know all this might sound stupid and meaningless but trust me, Moon. I am not good with words. I am sorry I was not there for you for so many important years of your life. I would have spoiled you, I would have taken all your teenage tantrums and I would give anything away to have my Sorella back. I don't eve-" I cut him in between by engulfing him into a bone-crushing hug. 

How can I be so stupid? How could I say all those hurtful things to this fucking gem of a person? I know it will be hard for me but I need to try. 

Try to put my life back together. 

"I am sorry, Enzo." 

Yeah, fuck me! Being nothing but a bitch-ass half-eaten rotten carrot I have been for not updating. Honestly, my thoughts are not very helpful these days. I would like to shut up now, bye-bye.

THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE!