New Years Eve 2010
Max was glad school was out for the holidays. It wasn't that he didn't like university, but rather that the first few months of it had been a tag overwhelming and what he needed more than anything was a nice normal Christmas.
Though it wasn't quite normal what with Andrew and Emily moving back home. Max had suspected it had something to do with Mitch's heart attack, but only a few days after they'd settled in the couple had announced to the family that they were expecting their first child in spring which was the actual reason why they'd moved back home. Mitch was doing well, especially with Maggie's round the clock care, and the family didn't seem too worried.
Being best friends with Zoey looked a little different in university than it had in high school, though the fundamental aspects were still the same. The biggest difference now was how spread out their classes were. High School had been a solid day of attending classes, while university's let you choose which class times you wanted based on what was on offer. Sometimes though the choices were limited and you ended up with a day that had class at 8am, 1pm and 5pm. Those were not Max's favourite days. Despite it being the same actual amount of class time as his 8am, 11am, 1pm days it felt so much longer. It wasn't so bad when Zoey hung out with him but when her classes didn't match up she'd go home and he'd end up choosing between spending half the down time on a bus and half at home or all of it at school. Suffice to say, Max was spending a lot on the school library computers streaming let's plays.
The other odd things about universities was that they didn't have lockers. This meant that though Max still lived across the street from Zoey, he didn't have a locker beside her anymore. It was strange not seeing her every time he collected his books. Instead of in a locker, his books were in a bag, and on the bus with him everyday. Sometimes he missed real lockers. Though he supposed he could just use the locker-like things near the student union, but they were so far from his classes it hardly seemed worth it.
That was the other thing about universities: they were really big. The campus was more like a small city than a school and Max had to imagine that if he lived in the dorms he'd never leave the school grounds.
But that was all over for now. Max had been looking forward to the school break for months now and he was gonna enjoy it. They holidays for Max always involved the Clarke family and Christmas was no exception to that rule. Of course, he saw his family too but it wouldn't have been a normal Christmas season if they all didn't get together once or twice over the holidays.
And this year that meant a New Years eve party at theClarke's. Max and his parents had been invited next door for appetizers, drinks and good company all the way to midnight.
"It's been going well," Maggie was saying as they all stood around the food table talking. "The doctor's given us a list of foods to avoid and ones to aim for and I've been doing my best to keep him on the right track."
"It's not as easy as it sounds," Max's father was contributing to the conversation. "I remember when my cousin was struggling with keeping to a diet."
"I remember," Maggie replied. "She was diagnosed pre-diabetic right?"
"Yep," Max's father agreed. "Managed to stay that way thanks to changing her eating habits, but man oh man was it a hard ride."
While only half listening to their conversation Max had noticed something they seemed to have missed. The subject of their discussion was nowhere to be seen. Deciding to investigate, Max took his little paper plate of appetizers and went into the kitchen. There he found exactly what he had suspected: a piece missing from the cake that had been concealed by the clever placement of the napkin holder.
Smiling to himself, Max made his way upstairs where he knew the thief was hiding. Assuming the right place to look was the only closed door in the hallway, Max opened it and was not at all surprised by what he found.
"Shhh," Mitch whispered. "Close the door. I'm hiding."
Max did as he was bid and closed the door behind him.
"I guessed as much," Max said, laughing quietly.
"Cake is not on the doctor recommended food list," Mitch explained, though Max had already figured this out.
"You know Maggie is only annoying because she cares so much about you," Max explained.
"I know," Mitch replied, looking only a little guilty. "And I love her all the more for it, but this slice of cake, you don't understand, it was begging to be eaten."
"Begging," Max laughed.
"It looked up at me with it's big sad eyes and said 'eat me. I don't want to go to waste,'" Mitch explained.
"I don't think you quite understand the sentience level of baked goods," Max laughed.
"The universe is infinitely complex. You don't know," Mitch replied.
"Oh I think I do," Max laughed.
"Just so long as you don't tell Maggie where I am," Mitch said.
"Don't worry," Max smiled. "I'll keep your secret."
"You better," Mitch sniggered. "What with me keeping your secrets and all."
"I don't have secrets," Max scoffed.
"Oh? What about those feelings for my daughter, huh?" Mitch said, raising an eyebrow before taking another huge bite of his cake.
"I thought you were all drugged up and making stuff up at the hospital," Max mumbled after a moment of awkward silence.
"And how long did it take you to convince yourself of that?" Mitch asked. "What are you so afraid of, son?"
Max didn't speak for a minute, mulling it over. It was uneary how accurate Mitch was. Max hadn't even realized until now that Mitch was right. Max had spent those next few days after the hospital coming up with reasons why Mitch had said what he'd said that made it all less real. So why had Max done that? Why had he felt the need to talk himself out of something that he knew deep down to be true?
"She doesn't feel the same," Max said eventually, realizing the truth of these words even more as he spoke them outloud. "If I tell her she'll just reject me and it'll ruin our friendship."
"She might," Mitch said calmly. "And yes that is very possible, but you can't actually know unless you try."
"How come you've figured me out, but no one else has?" Max asked both wanting to know the answer and very much wanting to change the topic.
"You remind me of someone," Mitch smiled. "Someone who used to glaze the way you gaze."
"Who do you mean?"
"Me," Mitch replied with a smile. "I used to look at Maggie the same way I've caught you gazing at Zoey. That's how I know."
"Why are you telling me this?" Max asked.
"You're a good kid, Max," Mitch said. "I've known you all your life. I couldn't wish for anything better for my Zoey, but if you don't tell her soon she is gonna get swept away by someone else." He paused. "I'm surprised she hasn't already. What are you guys like half way through first year university? Has she met anyone?"
"Some classmates," Max shrugged. "But we still hang out alot."
"Does she talk about any one of those classmates more than the others?" Mitch asked.
"Simon," Max replied, reluctantly.
"Ah see," Mitch grinned. "If you aren't careful she will get swept off her feet right from under you."
"I-," Max began, unsure what he meant to say. "I mean it's just, we've been friends so long. I couldn't bear to lose that. If she rejects me and that changes what would my life even look like?"
"And if she feels the same as you what would your life look like then?" Mitch countered. He smiled, ate a piece of cake then continued. "Sometimes in life you have to risk losing something precious in order to gain something priceless."
"And by that do you mean your health and that cake?" Max asked.
"Hey, I believe we were talking about you here," Mitch shot back.
"Oh no we are so over me," Max tried to laugh and not think about it. "I believe I have a cake crime to report."
"You wouldn't," Mitch said with narrowed eyes.
Max laughed again, then moved closer to sit on the couch beside Mitch. "Nah I wouldn't," Max agreed. "But only because it's a special occasion. Back on the doctor's recommended eating list as soon as the holidays are over, deal?"
"Deal," Mitch chuckled lightly.
There was a moment in which no one talked. Then Max sighed, and added soberly. "You really think I should tell her?"
"No," Mitch replied. "I think you have to tell her. No should about it." Max sighed. He could already feel the anxiety at the idea of telling her building up in his chest.
"If you don't tell her," Mitch continued. "You will forever be asking yourself 'what if'. This will hang over you, holding you back."
"You know you aren't my dad, right," Max smiled at him. "I mean this is starting to feel like fatherly advice here."
Mitch shrugged. "Can't turn the parent mode off," he said. "It's a dad thing."
"Soon you're gonna need a grandpa thing," Max chuckled.
"Oh that's easy," Mitch grinned. "Feed them candy then send them home to their parents." Max couldn't contain his laughter.
"Now get out of here and go find Zoey," Mitch ordered, gesturing with his hands to show he meant it. "Shoo and leave me alone with my beautiful cake."
Max chuckled as he made his way out of the room.
Was tonight really the night that he'd tell her? Could this one moment in time change his entire life going forward? It depended on if he had the guts to even try no matter what Mitch said.
Max returned downstairs and found Zoey standing around the appetizer table talking with her family. Before he got very close she spotted him.
"Hey Max!" Zoey called. "There you are."
"Was I lost?" Max chuckled as he came to stand beside her.
"We were just all guessing where you went," Zoey explained. "It's almost midnight."
"I don't suppose you were hiding wherever my husband has run off to?" Maggie asked.
"Mitch won't miss the countdown," Max replied, being careful not to explain further.
Max turned to look at Zoey again and was momentarily awed into silence. How did she look so beautiful without effort he wasn't sure. Those brilliant eyes shone as if trying to display all the wonders of the mind beneath. And then Max couldn't help wondering if it was moments like this that had given him away to Mitch. He'd always supposed that when he looked at Zoey his thoughts were his own, but maybe he was wrong. Maybe his emotions were written on his face for all to see.
Before they all moved from the kitchen to the living room to watch the big New Years countdown, Mitch made his appearance, without a single crumb to give him away. And suddenly everyone's mind was on the countdown. Except for Max whose mind couldn't have been farther from 2011 right now.
How could he tell her? That is if he had the nerve to do it at all. What were the right words to explain to someone that they were the very best thing in your life without coming off as needy or clingy or something else he didn't want to be.
Maybe he was overthinking this. Maybe words weren't needed. What if he just kissed her at midnight and then if she reacted badly he'd just blame New Years? Yeah that seemed safe.
Oh, who was he kidding? That took bravely beyond his capacities.
If he was really honest with himself how Max wanted to tell her was like a flash mob serenade, but if he didn't have the guts to kiss her at midnight then that was definitely out.
Zoey looked up at him and in that moment, more so than any other moment in his entire life, Max wanted to kiss her.
Okay so he wasn't brave enough to jump out of the plane without knowing if he was wearing a parachute, but what if he could test and see if there might be a parachute before he jumped?
"Have you ever wondered Zoey," Max began. "I mean midnight on New Years can be kinda a romantic thing sometimes, and I was just curious, have you ever thought what it would be like if that's how we were?"
Zoey looked confused at first, turning to face him with an odd look on her face. "Where did that come from?" she asked.
"Just a thought," Max replied.
"Wouldn't that be kinda weird," Zoey said eventually. "Us dating?"
"Weird is the first word that comes to mind for you?" Max asked, wanting to make sure he heard her correctly what with all the talking going on around them. On the plus side all this noise meant no one else could hear them.
"Yeah I mean dating is way too casual for us," Zoey continued. "Friends for life end up in the same seniors home. Guys you date just end up as archived phone contacts."
"I suppose yeah," Max said, totally chickening out.
"Three, two, one," everyone chanted at once. "Happy New Year!" And suddenly the room was full of noise makers going off mixed and people cheering, but Max didn't feel like a part of it.
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Really slow update here sorry but now that my exam is over and I don't have school again for a whole month hopefully I'll use that month to write. :) Maybe even complete this story. Please let me know what you think by leaving a review. Thanks!
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Sneak Peek Chapter 07
He had no better way of describing his current state of mind than the emotional equivalent of hanging his head against a wall.
The funniest consequence of all this was that Zoey had noticed something was wrong and was therefore trying to cheer him up, that way she did when she knew something was wrong but didn't think you wanted to talk about it.
But when she wasn't trying to cheer him Zoey was talking more and more about Simon. Simon was a new friend she'd made in one of her classes. Max tried to console himself that she was at least not dating him. Though this did made him feel more and more sure that if he didn't tell her for real soon, Mitch's prediction would come true.