Harper
I hear a knock at my door knowing it was kailtyn. i was pretty excited to hangout with her, i haven't seen her in forever.
"hey harper" she says engulfing me in a big hug. "i've missed you and hanging out with you practically everyday"
kailtyn is one of the very few people i trust, she knows about my home life and my dads addiction. when the house gets bad, she always lets me over and i'm so thankful for it.
we almost dated for awhile and we honestly would have but i didn't want to torture her. our whole relationship would have just been me crying and coming over, i also just didn't have time to commit to a serious relationship and nor did i want to because of how unstable i was. i like having no responsibilities and fucking around so i'm thankful she understood where i was coming from.
"so you are telling everyone i gave you those hickeys?" she asks laughing looking at my neck.
"mhm" i hum back not really wanting to talk about billie. i've had enough questions about her today.
i get why she could be curious, i would be to.
"why didn't you just tell them it was her?"
"because, i don't know. i don't want that attention and shit, especially don't want people to think we are anything more than friends because we arnt" i say honestly.
"and she knows that? because she seems kinda whipped on instagram"
"yeah she knows we are nothing more, i wouldn't do that to her" i say thinking about how many girls i've played with feelings wise.
i like billie though, she isn't just a fuck and talk to for a day than leave. i want her in my life, and she knows this. i'm glad she does.
she's able to make me feel like nothing else matters in the world. i'm so glad we have gotten close.
"glad you guys are not serious than, scared me when everyone was questioning you at lunch" kaitlyn says with a smirk.
"and why is that" i tease as she moves so she's sitting on top of me now.
"so i can do this" kaitlyn says connecting her lips to mine.
don't get me wrong, kaitlyn is one of the hottest girls, good at sex, basically the only person i would let top me, and everything you could want.
but she wasn't billie, and when she kissed me all i could think about was how i didn't feel the same way kissing her than i do with billie.
i was about to pull away from her lips but she did it first before instantly placing her lips on my neck.
the pleasure is to much to pull away as i continue to let her suck on my sweet spot.
"you like that?" she asks mumbling into my neck before sucking on a new spot.
"mhm" i moan softly throwing my head back on the couch.
her hands trail up my leg and into my inner thigh when i finally stop her.
"but i cant do this" i say grabbing her hand causing her to pull away.
"that's fine, you ok?" she asks seeming genuinely concerned.
i don't think i've ever told her to stop once. in fact i've never told anyone to stop once, i don't know what it was.
"sorry, i don't know what came over me." i say honestly as she gets off my lap and sits next to me on the couch. "lets just watch a movie or something" i say grabbing the remote from the table.
"is it your dad?" she asks still with a concerned tone in her voice.
i shake my head no and then turn the TV on.
i think i just wanted her to be billie. and i've never felt that feeling in my life.
we don't talk for the rest of the time as the movie plays.
it finally ends as i walk kaitlyn out the door.
"sorry, you know, about earlier" i say watching her leave.
"don't be harper, i totally understand" she says with a soft comforting smile.
kaitlyn really is a great friend who respects boundaries.
"text me when you get home"
"will do" she says getting into her car.
i watch as she pulls away feeling my phone vibrate.
billie: hey wyd
harper: nothin, kaitlyn just left we just chilled and watched a movie hbu
billie: ft me
i call her and she answers on the first ring. i smile instantly when i see her face causing her to do the same.
"i'm bored as shit" she says breaking our silence.
"write a song or something" i suggest walking into the kitchen to get food.
"not inspired enough"
"make one about me" i joke causing her to laugh.
"i actually have thought about it"
"really? imagine you are infront of a crowd of like 20,000 people screaming lyrics that are about me" i say causing her to laugh.
"it was going to be about how i'm using you for your car and how you actually mean nothing to me"
"ouch" i say in a fake hurt tone making her laugh.
"joking, wait and see"
"will do" i reply walking towards my room taking off my hoodie and laying down on my bed.
her face dropped for a seconded and i couldn't tell what was wrong.
"you good?" i ask a little concerned as the smile disappeared from her face.
"yeah, just a text from my mom she's coming home later than excepted. i think i'm going to go though, my phones about to die" she than says. i knew she was lying but i didn't want to push it.
"oh, okay talk to you later" i say watching her force a smile before hanging up.
did i do something? i'm genuinely confused on why her mood just went from 100 to 0 in like a seconded.
and i knew her phone wasn't about to die and even if it was she could just plug it in, her charger is right there. that excuse is so bad, i'd rather her just tell me she doesn't want to talk to me.
i try not to overthink it much, it could really just be her mom coming home late.
Billie
i was not in the mood to talk to harper at all. she took her hoodie off knowing what she was doing, she knew i would see the hickeys kaitlyn gave her. she was trying to me me jealous on purpose and it worked.
than she's going to play stupid and act like she doesn't know what's wrong? i did not want to play her games.
i don't even know why i'm so upset, shes not ignoring me like she promised, we aren't dating, i don't own her and she's aloud to make any decision she wants.
she just made it seemed like we maybe might have had something going. i was stupid for believing that though.
i sigh as i turn off my phone and stare at my ceiling.
my phone vibrates a couple times and finally decided to check it knowing it's proabbly harper and not to my suprise i was right.
harper: call me back when u get the chance
harper: i feel like i didn't something
harper: billie please
as much as i wanted to text her back i fight the urge and walk out of my room to greet fin who's excited about something.
"BILLIE BILLIE BILLIE" he screams running to me, my parents just as confused as i was.
"holy shit what" i ask as i've never seen him this excited about anything in my life.
"interscope records! they fucking want us to come in tomorrow and talk to us! they heard a song on the EP or something and reached out to me! we might get a fucking record deal" he says all in one breath with the biggest smile on my face.
"holy shit, are you for real? that's literally insane!" i say my cheeks starting to hurt from how much i was smiling.
"that's incredible! i'm so proud of you guys" my mom says hugging me in fin as my dad joins in to.
"i don't want to get your hopes up bil, but you might just be the next superstar" fin says still estatic about the whole situation.
god i could only imagine, just 15 people singing my songs in a small venue is the best feeling in the world, i cant even imagine what it's like to have a whole area shouting your name.
"what time tomorrow?" i ask finally being able to calm myself down.
"10:00 am" he replies quickly.
"this is so crazy" i say as fin hugs me one more time.
i run back to my room where i instantly call zoe and drew to tell them the news.
"that's so fucking crazy bil, we are so proud of you!" zoe says over the phone.
"we are so celebrating tomorrow" drew follows.
"i might not even get asked to sign though, don't get your hopes up! it's not a for sure thing"
"billie you and fin are some of the most talented people i know. they are plain stupid if they don't give you an offer" zoe says which made me smile.
"god, i love you guys so much. i wish i could hug you" i say into the phone still so excited about everything that is going on.
"we will see you tomorrow" drew says again before we change the subject to talk about some other stuff.
we finally end the phone call and as i get ready for bed my mind is drawn to harper. i want to tell her and i know she would be so proud but i cant just act like everything's okay when it's not.
i want to tell her how i feel. how i think i might seriously like her.
the thought scares me and the thought of rejection scares me even more.
then again i might be signing to a fucking label tomorrow so it's not all bad.
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a/n- hope u all r good lol, billies radio thing with her dad came out today and it's the cutest thing in the entire world i love her