"Are you in there? If not here, then where'd you go?
They say the living are on Earth and the dead are out,
But where are those trapped in-between high and low?
Where exactly are you wandering about?"
~ Karl Kristian Flores.
~×~
The next morning, my cheek still ached something awful. Not only did my cheek feel as if it had split in two, but my head also throbbed from the wine. The image of Shane and Lori seemingly burn deep into my brain. Not enough alcohol could get those two out of my head.
While pulling on a fresh pair of jeans, I think of Rick. That poor man did not know what went down last night. His own best friend and wife, how sickening. Rick might be clever, but he was a damn fool to think Shane is good for anyone.
And Dixon? What exactly is his problem? Last night something inside of Dixon wanted to scream. Pull, push, and scream. Those eyes filled with grief. He couldn't have been just drunk - those cat eyes were red due to tears as well. What exactly could Dixon be sad about?
Merle Dixon? Maybe. The end of the fucking world? I can't tell.
Deep down, I feel for him. Why? I can't tell that either.
My thoughts get the best of me; I continue to pull on a grey tank top over my naked torso and drape a button-up shirt onto my shoulders. Leaving it unbuttoned. Stepping out of my room, I roll up the sleeves of my button-up, Carol and Sophia also make their way from their room. Hands held tightly together like always.
The first thing Carol saw was my cheek - that friendly smile fades and she nears me to get a better look. I can tell what she is thinking. What everyone else will think once I join them for breakfast.
"What happened to your face?" Carol points at her cheek, sizing up my bruise with her silver eyes.
"Oh," I start whilst pushing my wavy hair into my usual ponytail. "Let's not talk about that now, huh? I'm starving." I suggest before forcing a smile.
Carol gives a questionable stare but mouths an 'okay' before telling Sophia to hurry so they wouldn't miss breakfast. I follow the mother and daughter duo in silence, wishing inside my head that I minded my own business last night.
When the three of us made it into the dining room, most of our group was already seated. No one barely spoke a word as we sat down to join them. We are all hungover or too exhausted to speak.
Glenn is hunched over, eyeing his bowl of oatmeal, baseball cap on the table. Both hands held clumps of his hair. Jackie sat beside him. Rubbing his back, whispering comforting words.
Lori sat in between Rick and Carl. She ducks her eyes from my own as soon as I sat down across from her. Poking her eggs in misery.
Jodie, my lord, and savor push a plate full of eggs and bacon in front of me. She studies my cheek as she does so.
"Celebration went well I see..." Jodie says, gripping her fork.
I want to retort and suggest asking where she might have run off to last night, however, Shane slowly wanders into the dining room. As he gives every one the usual 'good morning' Shane took a seat beside T-Dog and Dale. T-Dog is the first to notice the three large scratch marks going across Shane's neck. His brows narrow and his eyes squint, getting a better look.
"Man, what happened to your neck?" T-Dog questions.
Shane automatically raises his brown eyes onto me. The others follow his gaze. "I guess I slept too roughly," Shane shrugs. He is transfixed on his plate now, pushing cold eggs onto it. Everyone, including Jodie, look in between us. Trying to piece it all together. I shift in my seat awkwardly, catching a glimpse of Daryl studying me from his lonesome table.
Edwin is the last to enter the room. The bags underneath his blue spheres managed to grow larger overnight. Not only is his balding head unkept, but Edwin also wore the same clothes he had on yesterday evening. This man just doesn't fit the description of who I would have guessed to give us answers.
While nibbling on a piece of bacon in silence, Edwin wishes everyone a good morning. He slithers his way to the freshly brewed coffee.
"Hey, Doc." Shane began, turning his face away from his plate to look over at Edwin. "I don't mean to slam you with questions first thing -"
"But you will anyway," Edwin mumbled, pouring himself some coffee.
"We didn't come here for eggs," Andrea says roughly.
Edwin gives out a sigh, coffee in hand. A look of dread forms across his face. Andrea and Shane are right. We didn't come here to play house and act as if everything is fine above us. If he is stalling with information, this bullshit had to be bad.
**
Jodie and I stood side by side in the Big Room. Edwin walked before us, readying himself to give us a speech. One long speech we're all ready for. Edwin turns his attention onto the blank screen, coffee mug still in hand, "Vi, play back test subject TS-19."
The large television comes to life. An M.R.I flickers across the screen. Pictures of a brain surrounded by a human-like silhouette could be seen. I search the image with curiosity. I've seen images like this during my time as a lawyer. Deadly images could make any normal person vomit their lunch. Well, that was before the dead began eating people.
"Few people ever got a chance to see this. Very few." Edwin explains.
"Is that a brain?" Carl asks.
"An extraordinary one," Edwin speaks in a dreamy tone. "Not that it matters in the end." His tone suddenly becomes dull and flat. Along with his expression. "Take us in for E.I.V."
The screen zooms into this extraordinary muscle. Showing the inside of test subject TS-19's brain. Strange lights flicker and dance within. Every neutron could be seen. Sending light to one another. Speaking a language we could never completely understand.
"What are those lights?" Daryl questioned. Dixon stood beside Jodie, biting the edge of his thumbnail. I look over at him, amazed by his will to listen and care about what is happening on the screen. His mouth now held open in awe, picking the little hairs on his chin.
"It's a person's life - experiences, memories. It's everything. Somewhere, in all that organic wiring, all those ripples of light are you. That thing that makes you unique. And human."
"You don't make sense ever?" Daryl questions seriously.
"Those are Synapses; Electric Impulses in the brain that carry all the messages. They determine everything a person says, does, or thinks from the moment of birth to the moment of death."
"Death? That's what this is, a visual?" Rick moves closer to the screen. Gazing in between Jenner and the Electric Impulses.
"Yes," Edwin simply says.
"This person died?" Andrea questions next.
"Who?"
"Test Subject, 19. Someone who was bitten, and infected. She volunteered to have us record the process."
My mouth is shut, eyes unmoved from the screen. I can't look away. My brain wanting to understand what causes these things to become inhuman. To truly understand, I must soak in enough information.
"Vi, scan forward to the first event."
"Scanning forward to the first event," Vi replies. Doing exactly what Jenner demands.
The brain stem suddenly turns black. Killing the brain slowly but surely. The process beginning to take hold. TS-19 was dying.
"What is that?" Glenn questions in horror.
"It invades the brain like meningitis. The Adrenal Glands hemorrhage. The brain does shut down. Then the major organs ... then death."
Within a short period, the virus infects 19's body. Causing her to go haywire, the whole brain becomes dark in a matter of minutes. 19's heart monitor suddenly goes flat - a signal that she was now dead. Gone forever.
"Everything you ever were or will be - gone," Edwin spoke faintly, staring at the screen with sorrowful eyes.
This is what happened to Anthony. Francis. Greg. Mom. It was as if someone pulled a plug on their brain. Shutting down everything without mercy or warning. We can't stop death, but the thought of our loved ones dying - brings me to tears. My vision becomes a blur and tears break from the brim, rolling down my cheeks. I swiftly move my hands up to my face to wipe away the painful tears as soon as they come.
Since mom died, I never had the time to just let the hurt fall. Never had time to digest what we once had now gone forever. Usually, I could keep my cool. Act as nothing bothered me whatsoever. I did this mostly for Jodie. I needed to be strong for her. But how long can I stay strong? All of this is heartbreaking and difficult to swallow.
Feeling ashamed, I glance around the room, in hopes no one saw me break. Sure enough, Daryl held his gaze right on me. Giving me that same look from last night. Once our eyes locked, searching for something I couldn't quite tell, Daryl breaks the staring contest to look back at the screen.
Andrea breathes in heavily. We all look over towards the grieving woman. Lori clears her throat, noticing Edwin's questionable stare. "She lost someone two days ago. Her sister."
Edwin moves closer to Andrea, placing a gentle and supporting hand onto her shoulder. "I know how it feels. I lost someone as well. The feeling is devastating." Andrea simply nods her head, holding back the tears threatening to escape.
"Vi, scan to the second event," Edwin commands.
"Scanning to the second event."
The video fasts forward a bit. What looked like a few hours after TS-19's death.
"The resurrection time varies wildly; we have reports of it happening in as little as three minutes. The longest we heard was eight hours. In the case of this patient, it was two hours, one minute - seven seconds."
Sparks of red slowly invade the dark area of the brain stem. Moving its way towards the lower part of the brain. Just like the white sparks before 19's passing.
"It restarts the brain?!" Lori squeaked from behind me.
"No, just the brain stem. Basically, it gets them up and moving." Edwin answers.
"But, they are not alive?" I speak up after a moment of listening. This is the appropriate time to ask the right questions.
Edwin turns his head at me and points up at the screen, "You tell me."
"It's not like before. Most of the brain is dark." Rick says directly at me, shaking his head.
"Dark, lifeless, dead. The frontal lobe, the neocortex, the human part - that doesn't come back. The you part. Just a shell. Driven by mindless instinct."
The silhouette of 19 begins to reanimate. The brain is waking her back up, but it isn't her. Not the woman she was before. And as she gasps in hunger, ready to rip into living flesh, a bullet tore through the brain tissue. Her silhouette slumps just as it had before. Completely done for.
"God, what was that?" Carol exclaims while holding Sophia close.
"He shot his patient in the head. Didn't you?" Andrea's questions were lowly.
Edwin bows his head. Now quiet. An eerie silence fell between us all. As the man who was supposed to save the world from this shuts down into deep thought. The darkest thoughts.
"Vi ... Power down the main screen and workstations."
Vi does as it is told and the big screen and workstations shut off. The hums from the computers echo inside the room, as we gather and piece all of the information together.
"You have no idea what this is, do you?" Andrea sniffles.
"It could be microbial. Viral. Parasitic. Fungal-"
"Or the wrath of God?" spoke Jackie for the first time since entering the Big Room. Her voice trembled, whilst her eyes twinkled in fear.
"Yes. There's that." Edwin nods his head, thinking it over.
"Somebody must know something. Somebody. Somewhere. They have to..." I take one step forward, rubbing my sweaty hands against my jeans. This couldn't be the end. How could it be? We came here for answers and here we are, still riddled with even more questions.
"There are others, right?" Carol adds. "Other facilities?"
Edwin moves awkwardly as we ask him the right questions. The expression is on his face unreadable. "There may be some. People like me."
"But you don't know?! How can you not know?!" Rick blurts out. Just as frustrated as the rest of us.
"Everything went down. Communications, directives - all of it. I've been in the dark for almost a month," Edwin admits.
"So, it's not just here?" Jodie peeps, holding onto my arm. I can feel her trembling.
"There's nothing left anywhere? Nothing?" Andrea finishes for Jodie. Anger form on her face. "That's what you're really saying, right?"
Silence.
Edwin comes completely speechless, searching the metal floor for a real answer. He bites his bottom lip, while his fingers brush against the end of his shirt. That is our answer. There is nothing left. No one can fix this. Jenner is the last man standing.
"Man, I'm gonna get shitfaced drunk ... again." Daryl huffed, leaning against one of the desks. Rubbing his temples with the palms of his hands.
"Dr. Jenner, I know this has been taxing for you and I hate to ask one more question, but..." Dale moves towards the clock I've forgotten all about. "That clock - it's counting down. What happens at zero?"
Those red-colored lines read; one hour until zero.
"The basement generators - they run out of fuel," Edwin says nonchalantly, turning on his heels, and start his way out of the room.
"And then?!" Rick calls out after Edwin, but Edwin continues out of the room. Leaving us all to figure this out on our own. "Vi, what happens when the power runs out?!" Rick spoke towards the ceiling.
"When the power runs out; Facility-wide decontamination will occur."
"What does that mean?" I whisper faintly. "What in the hell did we get ourselves into."