Part two.
But here was this intuition coming from within me that— whatever it was, it was just not good. It was ominous; something which aligned with those black clouds hovering over us. I would have felt it already if I wasn't in the phase of denial. But I sensed it. I did see it coming. Still though without retreating away, I fired back: "Yes! And I really want him back. If you please, could nicely hand him over to me,” I didn't know how I was using mockery in that situation suddenly when on contrary I was everything but feeling any humour inside. Though, I was angry; blinded by the unfairness of life. “It'd be awfully kind of you. We'd best be on our way,” I sniffed, rubbing my nose. “My Uncle would be waiting for us inside," I added with confidence, it was more of a command than a statement in the heat of the moment. Upon completion, I nodded my head in the direction of the station to prove my point. And on impulse, I forwarded myself even closer to him, extending my already wet and shaking arms up to the length of my head, due to his hovering height over me, for him to hand over my brother back. I was desperate. I stared at him, craning my neck to look up at him. While my heart was at an erratic phase of beating. Still, though I emboldened myself— for my brother.
“It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.” I chanted in my head. “It's going to be alright.”
Feeling the unknown gazes of the people at the side of my face, I let my eyes roll over the place where I saw them: his men. And those men! At least they weren't anywhere close. They stayed where they were; at a safe distance, which also gave me enough courage. Breathing, and shuddering, I stood there waiting for him, my arms still up in the air, extended towards my Shaur. However, he just stood still, peering down at me without moving a muscle. But, I knew somehow; I saw the corner of his lips turned upwards. Now, was I imagining things? But just maybe- maybe I was hallucinating because, in the very next second, he arched his brow down at me in astonishment. His fair face marred into something which I did not fathom. Not that I wanted to even. We stayed still, my hopes beginning to crumble down at his serene stance. He didn't seem to be thinking of it. We stared each other down, for quite a good time. My emotions brimming inside altogether, buoying even in my head. The pain was too much to endure and the cold wasn't making it any better along with his perturbing matter. My eyes were bleaker though, but I somehow managed to make my voice harder as I reiterated:
"I'm still waiting," I reminded him, my hands still extended in the air towards my baby brother.
Why wasn't he saying anything? I was panicking inside because of the lack of action from his side.
Please make him give my brother, Shiv Ji! Please make him give my brother to me! I prayed, internally. “Please. Please. Please, Shiv Ji.”
It was so much like a dream or rather a nightmare to me which I certainly thought it'd be over once I woke up from it. If only had I known that it wasn't an illusion as I was thinking it was, but a true—happening reality I would have not been so gallant or rather stupid as I had been.
He sighed heavily. "Don't you see it, little one?" His ever-so-soft-spoken affirmative question perplexed me into a new torrent of awaiting tragedy.
Frowning, and shuddering, I countered: "See what?"
Gesturing his spare— right stout arm over at the present, other people: his men, who were accompanying him, those who stood not very far from him; though closer to him, he countered back, voice as sweet as a coated candy:
How could he be this calm and use sweet-coating words in such monstrous circumstances? I shivered in the cold inclement weather. I was disoriented.
"I did not come here from another side of the country by plane this instant to get back home empty-handed,” contrary to his blazing eyes, his voice was soft. “You'll be coming with me,” his eyes never left my face. “With or without your consent.”
I stilled. Was he even real? My mind whispered, terrified. He wouldn't force me again. Would he? What'd I do to escape him now? Oh, Shiv Ji- help me! I prayed, again and again, and again for a miracle to occur. For my uncle to miraculously appear. My eyes filled with a new set of tears as I stared hard at the ground.
Uncle?! Where are you? Where are you, Uncle? I begged, inwardly. “Please be here soon…” Suddenly, a thought struck me: Should I beg now? To him to let us go? The idea seemed tempting. But would he let us go? It was the main question. Then, what about your self-respect? What happened to your self-esteem, now? You'd beg him but for what? For your own human rights? Why back out now? When you know it was wrong! Another voice at the back of my head seemed to be sneering at me for being weak. Now, I so wish— wish to go back in time and have him eradicated once and for all from my life. I wish. Oh! I hoped so.
If only I had known that my wish would always stay a wish that I certainly hoped to come true. But it didn't, so I clenched my teeth. Calming my bulging nerves of anger and pain and affliction, I begged, keeping aside my self-esteem and self-respect and my own tormented state- I tried to beg him- not because of him. Not even for myself. But for my brother. “Yes! I've to, for my little brother,” keeping that in mind, I calmed my breaths. "Why do you want us to come with you? Why don't you just leave us alone?" My voice quivered, my chin wobbled, eyes felt unusually heavy. I asked the same questions trying to get the answers. I peered at him vulnerably. Anger; frustration; blazing defiant: long gone. Instead fear and anxiety took place within me when the gravity of the situation finally sat in after coming out from the blinding anger I was feeling. Blinking, when I thought he wouldn't be answering, I continued: "What is the relation between us? Nothing, don't you see it? We have no relation. We're merely strangers. A STRANGER!" I reminded him, emphasizing. Eyes were brimmed with afresh tears when replaced by the old ones. His figure was blurred from my vision. Blinking back, I stood, hands falling on my side at his nonchalant behaviour. Still, though, I reasoned: "Listen I won't be complaining to the police if that's what is making you chase us. I promise! I won't go to the police or file a complaint against you. Just trust me and let us go," I breathed hard, really hard after begging from my croaked voice, the lump in my throat making it even more difficult to swallow the saliva. I was in a daze- that I so wanted to duck.
My eyes begged him, tears shone brightly in the thunder light, shuddering and shaking, my teeth clattered against one another; stance unnerved. I peered at him, beseechingly. My hands trembled terribly at my sides; fits clenched tightly making my knuckles turn reddish white in the cold weather; the cold breeze whooped past me, leaving me in a broken state more than I was already in.
Albeit, there was a voice- somewhere, I did not know exactly where but it was there— somewhere anyhow; asking me, quarrelling with me:
How did he come to know about my whereabouts? How? How could he know? Who'd have helped him? Was it Fatima? No! She was the one who helped me escape then, why'd she be doing something like that? No. She wouldn't have told him. Then who? Who could that be? We were the only ones who knew about my escape plan, weren't we? Then who could that be? Who would've told him? Who? Questions swirled around my mind exactly like the speed of a bullet train. If he hadn't known about my whereabouts I would have been home by now with my Uncle along with my brother in the confinements of my home where the memories of my parents are still alive. I wistfully thought. Not with him, again.
But, who would have thought these unbidden circumstances were awaiting us with open arms?
And here I thought I had regained my freedom. I thought sadly, heart-shattering into little pieces, which were left unbroken. I so wanted to ask— ask him: how he came to know where I was but I restrained myself, anyhow.
His charcoal eyes were blank and shining in the flickering yet apparent light of the thunderstorms. His stature was somewhat relaxed and serene. However, his obsidian eyes were having the intensity within— for us: on me. This was what made me afraid when I saw my hope crashing down as he countered in a cool and clipped tone:
"Little one, you don't have a choice. Either come with me willingly or you'll be making me angry, very angry and you would not like it when someone like me is angry.”
Thunder clashed with one another as the rain got heavier along with the cold. The weather was also finding its tormented release. And, I was stuck within myself when his words sank in as the ground swiped past my feet. I swallowed. “Because you won't like the outcome when I am angry.”
And I fell to my knees on the hard wet concrete floor in hopelessness.
"Don't make me force you my dear little one as I really don't want to.”