Me: Hello readers! Children. I have captured the paladins. Plus, Azaria and Kimara. I'll be asking them harmless questions. *smirkity smirk smirk*
Keith: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US!!! WE DID NOTHING WRONG!!! WHO ARE YOU!!!!
Me: Just call me Sparrow.
Azaria: Wassup Sparrow.
Me: Wassup Zari and Kim
Kim: Hey.
Allura: What are we doing here?
Me: We're slowly dying.
Keith: You understand me.
Pidge: We're eternal friends.
Azaria: HOLD UP! STAND 5 METERS AWAY FROM HER!!! NOW, LET ME JUST *crawls onto my back*
MY SISTER!!!
Kim:...
I'm proud.
Shiro: Keith.
Keith: *sheds imaginary tear* I taught her well.
Allura: Humans are crazy. Why is there another human in here?
Me:...who said I was human.
Hunk: Are you Galra?
Me: No. I'm cooler.
Lance: Altean?
Me: Cooler.
Kimara: A DINOSAUR
Me: I WISH!
Pidge: A demigod.
Me: Yeah, how'd you know?
Shiro: Your shirt says 'YOU DARE CHALLENGE A DEMIGOD'
Me:.......I didn't do that.
Me: Well...Shiro. Do you think you'll have a happy relationship with Allura?
Shiro: *turns red*
Allura:........why. Can't I have a crush in peace?
Me: Because I control everything.
Shiro: *whispers* maybe.
Me: I HEARD THAT!!!! HE SAID MAYBE!!!!
Allura: *blushes redder than blood*
Me: KISS KISS!!!
Me and Lance: FALL IN LOVE!!!
Azaria and Kim: We have to be friends with these people.
Me: Okay. That's a yes. Keith, how close have you and Pidge gotten?
Keith: Close enough we're able to spend the night making stupid conspiracy theories. And stupid stuff in general.
Pidge: Close enough that I could bite his hair. Or face.
Keith: It hurts...
Pidge: Do you think I care?
Keith:*sad*
Pidge:*hugs and bites his hair*
Keith: Stop.
Pidge: mo fank uo
Me, Lance, Hunk and Kim: Beautiful.
Me: Well, this girl has gotta do some more work. Lance, How close have you gotten to Hunk?
Hunk: We've been best friends since the Garrison. It's easy.
Lance: He sounds like a stalker when he talks about Shay.
Kim and Zari: WHO'S SHAY!
Pidge: *stops biting hair* HIS GIRLFRIEND! *continues to bite hair*
Me: Kim, why'd you prank the paladins?
Kim: I WAS BORED! THIS GIRL WAS IN THE LIBRARY JUST READING!!!
Zari: Good point.
Kim: And I don't know how to read Altean stuff. Zari ended up learning by some spell. Now, I know how to read Altean stuff. So, I stopped the threatening.
Keith: That's why you stopped. But, why'd you attack?
Zari: I didn't want to get caught.
Keith: Pidge! That tickled. Fair enough.
Me: Zari. What do think of Lance. Considering you guys got along immediately.
Zari: he's my new brother cuz Keith abandoned me.
Lance: We both have a certain thing for revenge when it comes to Keith.
Me: Beautiful. I actually think you'd get along with Leo Valdez. If only I could add him in this Fanfic.
Leo: I HEARD FANFIC! WHAT'S IT ABOUT!
Me: WRONG FANDOM, LEO! GET OUT!
Leo:*leaves while cursing in Spanish*
Me: Adiós.
Me: Ignore him. He's...not supposed to be here.
Stranger: LEO VALDEZ BAD BOY SUPREME!!!!
Leo: I-
Me: YOU'RE NOT IN THIS FANDOM!!! THIS IS NOT YOUR FANFIC!!!!
Leo: Tell me what it's about.
Me: *whispers in his ear* Kidge.
Leo: What's that?
Me: *whispering* The guy with the mullet and the girl with short hair that's biting his hair.
Leo: Okay. I am pleased with this.
Me: NOW LEAVE!!! *pushes him out the door*
Me: Okay. Now, we are ending this here. So, goodbye fellow Aliens, Witches and Wizards, Demigods and Mortals + muggles that have no idea what this means.
A to the Z