After Christmas and New Year's, they had settled back into a routine. Jay would go to work and Lauren would stay with the babies. Some days they visited with their aunts and uncles, but for the most part they just stayed at home. Mouse called as much as he could, but mainly Jay just got emails from him.
It was the week after New Year's, and Lauren had been helping plan Natalie's baby shower. Their little girl would be there in just a couple of months and Lauren was probably just as excited as Natalie. She couldn't wait for the twins to have a little cousin to play with.
She was curled up on the couch while the twins napped when Jay called. "Hey babe," she answered with a smile.
"Check my email," he said.
"Uh... Ok. What's wrong Jay?" she asked going to his laptop.
"Nothing.... I mean nothing is wrong, it's just a weird feeling."
"Ok... ok...." She said pulling up his email.
"There's one. All it says is that he misses us and we'll call tonight."
Jay sighed. "That's better than nothing then."
"I know.... I'm sure he's ok Jay. If he wasn't, he'd let you know."
"Yea.... Yea I know you're right. I just worry ya know?"
"Yea baby I know. The twins and I will be here when you get home."
"I can't wait. Give them hugs and kisses and I'll see you soon."
"See you soon," she said as they hung up.
She knew Jay was really worried about Mouse, but the last few calls she'd listened in on, he'd seemed ok. Maybe not as great as if he was at home with them, but he was ok. She hoped he would get to come home soon, if nothing else so Jay wouldn't have so much stress. She let out a soft sigh as she curled back up on the couch. Maybe he would be home soon.
She got the babies up from their nap and was in the living room with them, when Jay came in. He looked cold and had snow on his jacket. She was glad that she'd made homemade taco soup for supper. It would warm him up. "Say hey daddy," she cooed waving the twins arms from the floor.
They squealed seeing him and they kicked their little legs rolling over. Lauren knew before long they would be crawling. It made her glad and sad at the same time. Her babies were growing up.
"Hey little ones," Jay cooed kicking his shoes off and taking his jacket off. They both squealed again and Lauren giggled.
"I think they're tired of me," she laughed.
"No, they love mommy, don't you?" he cooed at them as he kissed her cheek.
The babies both laughed and smiled.
"Well mommy loves them and daddy," she smiled kissing his lips.
"And I love you," he smiled.
"Come on love, I got taco soup. It should warm you up. The news said we were probably gonna get a bad snow storm."
"Mmmmm taco soup sounds yummy. Work will be hell with snow."
"I know," she sighed picking up the twins to put in their bouncy seats. Jay played with the twins while she dished up their supper, and then they ate.
"This was really good babe," he smiled kissing her cheek as he took things to the kitchen for her.
"Thanks," she smiled. Just as she started dishes, they heard the laptop ringing.
Jay ran in there to answer it. Lauren gave them a few minutes while she cleaned up.
"Lauren?" Jay called after a few like normal.
"Yea baby. We're coming," she said picking up the twins.
They joined him around the laptop. Jay took Jayla and she held Jayden where Mouse could see them too. Jayla squealed and babbled at him. She loved talking to Uncle Mouse. Mouse talked to the babies for a bit until they got fussy.
"That's my cue. Time to get these two in the bath and to bed. It was good hearing from you Mouse. We miss you," Lauren said taking both the babies.
"I miss yall too. Give the babies hugs and kisses from me," he said as Lauren did as he asked. She took the babies to the bathroom and gave them a bath before nursing them and getting them down. Jay usually joined her by now, so she figured they must be having a serious conversation. She did Jayla's inhaler and then went to get ready for bed herself.
She saw he'd put the headphones on while she was getting the babies down. He only did that when Mouse was telling him something important. She let out a soft sigh hoping Jay would be ok. They just needed Mouse to come home.
About ten minutes after getting in bed, Jay joined her. "You ok?" she asked him quietly as he pulled her close to him.
"Yea.... Yea I will be," he said kissing the top of her head.
"You sure? Mouse ok?"
"Yea... They've just got a lot going on right now, and he just needed to talk."
Lauren softly kissed Jay's chest. "Well if you need to talk, you know I'll listen."
"Yea I know. I promise, I'm ok."
Lauren nodded. They watched a little TV until she drifted off in his arms. Jay stayed awake a little longer watching the news. He was worried about his friend and just needed him to come home. He did not like Mouse being over there with guys that Jay didn't know. He needed to know Mouse would be safe and protected, but he didn't and that worried him.
He eventually drifted off into a fitful sleep. His dreams were filled with memories of Kandahar. He tossed and turned eventually moving Lauren off him. In his sleep he hit her. Lauren woke instantly feeling his hand connect with her side. "Uhhhh..." she moaned. About that time he shoved his arm out which pushed her off the bed.
The next thing she knew he was over her with this crazy look in his eyes. He'd been dreaming and she knew it as soon as she saw the look in his eyes. She started to reach up and cradle his cheek. "Jay..." she whimpered. His hand come up and just before he dropped it to hit her, her voice whimpering his name snapped him out of it.
Lauren watched the realization spread across his face. "Jay.... Jay.... Jay...." she whispered trying to reach for him. He flinched and jumped off her. Lauren sat up watching his movements. "Jay.... Jay stop," she called as he threw clothes in a bag. "Jay.... please stop. What are you doing?" she cried jumping up and grabbing his arm.
He shrugged her hand off. "Jay... don't do this," she cried. "Where are you going?"
He didn't answer her. He threw on a jacket and grabbed his bag. Lauren begged and pleaded and cried with him to stop, but he wasn't listening to her. She sank in the floor crying hard as she heard their door open and close and he was gone.
She didn't know what to do. She didn't know where he was going. She hoped he would be back soon because she needed him. She eventually cried herself to sleep in the floor.
The babies woke about three hours later. They cried and fussed until she woke hearing them. Her eyes were swollen and she was sore from sleeping in the floor. She picked herself up looking around to see if he'd come back. When she realized he hadn't, a few more tears slipped out. She tried to pull it together as she went to get the twins.
Jay woke up at the cabin looking around. It was totally quiet and he was confused for a minute. Then he remembered why he was there and he cried a little. He'd hurt his precious girl. The one thing he swore he'd never do, he'd done. The sight of her under him when he came too absolutely broke his heart.
He had to keep her safe from himself and as long as Kandahar was on his mind he knew he had to stay away. He slowly got up and moved about. The snow storm had been rough and he was lucky to have made it to the cabin. He knew by now she'd be getting up and getting the twins up.
He thought about calling but he knew if he talked to her, he'd wanna go home. He had to keep her and the twins safe.
That day Lauren called every few hours and would leave him voice mails. The twins picked up on her mood and we're fussy and clingy all day. At bedtime they kept looking around and crying. She knew they were looking for Jay.
Once she finally got them down, she went to their room and cried. She called him over and over trying to get him to answer. She needed to know he was ok; she wanted him to come home.
After several hours of calling and him not answering, she finally cried herself to sleep. She only got maybe a couple of hours before the twins were up.
Each day Jay would get up and debate on whether to call her or not. Each night he'd wake from dreams of different parts of his first few years in the Rangers. He missed his wife something terrible, but he was so afraid of hurting her or their babies. He just couldn't do it. He couldn't take the chances of hurting her again. He wasn't eating and each day, after boxing several rounds in the basement, he'd work on trying to find peace like he had last time. He needed that peace before he could go home.
It went on like this all week. The days drug on and he'd never answer. At night the twins would cry and cry until they finally fell asleep. Lauren would call and call until she finally cried herself to sleep. Each night, at most, she'd get two hours of sleep.
She didn't tell Kelly and Shay or Will and Nat. This was her problem and she knew Jay wouldn't want them knowing. She didn't know how to get him to come home though. She missed him terribly, and she was slowly wearing her body out. She hadn't been eating good and the few hours of sleep she got weren't enough.
On Friday, the twins were especially fussy, and she'd been in the bathroom sick all morning. She needed help and she knew it. She was pale and tired and sick. She got the twins in their carrier with their bags. She leaned against the wall in the elevator going to the closest place she knew to get help before she was sick again.
Both the twins were crying and so was Lauren when she knocked on Will and Nat's door. To say Will was surprised would be an understatement. He knew something bad had happened to his brother just by looking at her.
She couldn't talk for her tears so he opened the door wider and let her in. She set the twins in the floor as Will and Nat shared a concerned look.
She turned around to tell them all that had been going on, but it was like slow motion. Her eyes rolled back in her head and her knees gave out. "Lauren," National screamed as Will rushed over and caught her before she hit the floor.
"Call Kelly and have him met us at Med," he said as he scooped Lauren up. He knew they couldn't call Jay because if he was ok then Lauren wouldn't be this upset. He grabbed Jayden's carrier and Nat grabbed Jayla's before Will could protest.
They got to the car and Natalie settled the twins while Will laid Lauren in the front seat. She called Kelly on their way; he didn't know what was going on, but said they'd meet them at Med.
Sure enough, Kelly and Shay pulled in at them same time. They took the twins and Natalie followed Will into the hospital. He laid Lauren on the bed in an empty ER room and started her on oxygen and an IV. He ordered blood work as well.
"Stay with her. Something has happened and I'm going to find Jay."
"He's probably just at work," Nat tried reasoning.
"If he was at work, she wouldn't look so worn down," Will pointed out. "And she would've just told us something happened at work. For some reason he's not around."
Natalie had to agree Will was probably right. "Be careful," she said kissing his lips.
"I will. Let me know if she wakes and what the blood work says."
Natalie nodded and Will left. She settled in the chair by Lauren's bed with her head resting on her pregnant stomach. "Well little one, it looks like we're gonna be here until Auntie Lauren wakes," she whispered.
She felt a kick and smiled. She hoped whatever was going on in her sister in laws life wasn't too bad and that she would wake up soon. Natalie started reading as she waited.