Hey guys! So this is the last chapter. I feel a little sad but I also feel liberated in a way although I doubt it makes any sense.
Anyway, there is an A. N at the end of the chapter which is important so please read it.
Thanks.
Now enjoy. I hope you like it. Comment and let me know. XD.
Bye!
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ELAHEH
I removed the bandage from my hands while I sat down, sweating heavily and getting my breath back. Once I was done, I hung up another punching bag for the next person.
I rotated my shoulders to try and get rid of the tiredness in them. All the while, I was smiling and greeting everybody, cracking silly jokes and making those training with me laugh at my silly antics.
To say that I was in a good mood was putting it mildly and I think everyone was beginning to fear for my sanity. It hadn't been long but we were slowly getting better. People had started smiling for real and they were beginning to laugh again. Although our loss was big, it was not something that any werewolf pack hadn't dealt with before. Every werewolf knew that we could not live in our losses although we never forgot them. A pack that was bonded could never forget the brothers they lost.
We were healing and now that the Alpha was back, the healing was easier. There was no fear, the pack was less vulnerable. Individually, we still suffered but we were stronger together.
It had been two weeks since Aleksy woke up. When I opened my eyes that morning, I had been surprised to see myself in his bed and wrapped tightly in his arms. My head was tucked under his chin and his after-rain scent felt like home.
My first reaction had been to panic. Had I crawled into his bed in my sleep? Considering how I was feeling last night I wouldn't have put it past myself. Had I disturbed all the crap he'd been hooked up to? I shut my eyes to try to get my breathing under control.
"I forgot how interesting it is to watch you work yourself into a panic."
I froze. That voice. It was deep and a little gruff. Like always, it slid over my skin like honey.
Immediately my eyes filled but it was when I looked into his eyes which were clearly laughing at me that I burst into tears. It wasn't a silent, graceful cry either. It was loud weeping. The kind of crying a child would do after seeing their parent after a really long time. It was filled with relief and sorrow and pain. I clutched his shirt and buried my face in his chest, my body shook violently as I cried.
His arms tightened around me, crushing me to him. I finally felt warm and safe. I was back in his arms and he held me like he planned on never letting me go.
"I'm sorry baby. I'm so sorry." He cooed as he stroked my hair.
"Don't ever do that again." I sobbed and it was a wonder that he understood me because my words were incoherent to my own ears.
He put a finger under my chin to force me to look at him.
"I don't like to make promises I can't keep. Especially to you." He said seriously. His eyes looked pained.
"Then don't break it," I begged. "You can't do that to me again."
"When I saw that bullet coming towards you-" his voice broke and he shut his eyes. I placed a hand on his cheek and stroked my thumb over his cheekbone.
"I was so scared." The admission shocked me. When did the big bad Alpha ever admit that he was scared?
"I've been scared ever since you took the bullet for me." I said quietly.
"I'm sorry Elaheh but if it ever came down to choosing between me or you, it will always be you."
"If you die I die anyway so I don't see what the fuss is about," I said and he didn't smile.
"I'll never stop trying to protect you." He said and I sighed.
"I missed you," I said, another tear sliding down my cheek.
He pressed his lips to my forehead and then both my cheeks and just when I thought he was going to kiss my lips he stopped. He was so close that we were breathing the same air.
"I'm sorry. I'm here now. I won't leave again. I'll never leave you alone."
With that, he kissed me hard. We kissed for a long time. It was urgent at first and then it slowed down. We were treasuring the kiss, treasuring each other. Finally indulging in the solace we found in the other.
When we finally broke apart, he was grinning. I'd never get tired of his smile. It used to be so rare and now he smiled more quickly and more easily.
"Why is it that you're always crying when we kiss?" He asked, "does it torture you that much to kiss me?"
I rolled my eyes. " Why is it that you kiss me only when I cry? Now I'm conditioned to believe I have to cry in order to be kissed by you."
"Is that so? I guess we'll have to change that then." He said. I shook my head and smiled and he kissed me again.
We were still kissing when the doctor came in. Needless to say, I was scolded like a child for not having called him as soon as Aleksy had woken up. I had to admit that it was pretty stupid. I was so caught up in having him back that I'd almost forgotten that he was sick. Not to mention he'd kissed me senseless.
Aleksy meanwhile chuckled at the whole thing, making me glare at him.
He then explained that he'd first woken up during the night and then again when Eric had come that morning.
When I heard that, I was ready to kill Eric. How could he not have woken me up? Then Aleksy explained that he had asked him not to wake anyone up. It was his turn to be lectured and I was surprised that he'd taken it quietly and even more surprised that the doctor had the guts to lecture him.
The hospital room was never empty for the next two days that he stayed there except at night. It was the only time we could be alone together. Kaveh and Jenna came back to see him and Jackie tagged along to see me.
I had to admit that some alone time with her was exactly what I needed. There was also the fact that I could see her getting a little insecure about my closeness with Alyssa. I didn't move my attention from her for the rest of the day and I believe she was pacified after that. I decided that the next time she came over I'd force them to spend time together, then Jackie would see how cool Alyssa was and she'd want to spend more time around her.
On his first night under observation, Aleksy was already restless. Not that I could blame him. He'd spent so much time in that stupid bed but I had to beg him to stay put.
I spent those two nights filling him in on everything that had happened while he was unconscious. He kept his eyes tightly shut as I told him the names of all the wolves we had lost. His jaw clenched and unclenched and he held onto me tightly.
"I'm so sorry you had to go through that alone Elaheh." He said.
"I'm a big girl," I said.
What else could I say? He'd saved my life and then he was apologizing because I had to deal with everything by myself the past two weeks. He was apologizing for something that wasn't his fault.
Now, once I was done unwrapping the bandages, I stood up and shook my arms and legs to relax my muscles. Chad and I walked for a bit together chatting about nothing in particular.
I was going to go home and shower and then help Aleksy with work. He would be in his office with Damian. His father had rushed back here as soon as he'd heard that Aleksy was awake. I had been unwilling to leave them alone together and Aleksy had all but shoved me through the door. He said that he would be fine but I didn't want to take chances. However, I finally relented after making sure that Aleksy knew that I would be sulking with him.
When I walked into the house, I could hear them talking about Aleksy's health. It took me fifteen minutes to go up, shower and change. Just as I was about to knock, I overheard them speak and like deja vu, I had to stop and listen.
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ALEKSY
My body had never felt heavier or weaker. When I woke up in the hospital, to say that I was feeling slightly disoriented would be an understatement. The bed was lumpy and uncomfortable, something I would have to look into. The walls were a depressing, impersonal shade of white. In my mind, I got only flashes of whatever put me here. There were wolves everywhere and blood.
The battle. I had heard before I saw the silver bullet singing through the air towards Elaheh. I remembered the fear coursing through my veins followed by adrenalin. I remember jumping in front of her to protect her and my body going completely weak even before the bullet touched me.
I remembered Elaheh holding onto me. I could see her tears and see her mouth moving. I remembered her words making me feel more alive than I'd ever felt before everything went black but I couldn't remember. What was it that she had said?
Elaheh... Was she okay? Trying to remember made my head hurt. I turned my head to the side and my heart stopped. There she had been. Asleep in a chair. She looked like this was the first time in days that she was getting to sleep.
My eyes had begun to droop and within seconds I was asleep, only to wake up again when Eric was there. I'd seen the way he looked at Elaheh like there was some kind of internal battle about whether it was okay or not okay to hurt over her. I had seen the look in his eyes when he held her like he wasn't willing to hand her over. I felt bad for him. I couldn't begin to imagine what it must have been like to be in love with someone for so long and know that they would never feel the same way.
Two weeks passed and I was slowly recovering. There were times when my head spun and it was difficult to stand up. Chad and Elaheh always insisted that someone be with me which made me feel like a child but I didn't mind my mate's company...except for right now while I sat with my father. She hated him and I couldn't blame her. She didn't like to leave me alone with him and as touched as I was at her concern, I could take care of myself. I had to almost remove her physically from my office before she agreed to leave. I knew she was going to make me suffer for it.
I had just taken out a velvet box that I kept hidden in a drawer, to examine the gift I had gotten Elaheh. It was a necklace from which hung a silver circle and inside it was a howling wolf. It was nothing fancy and nothing that she could show off to her friends but it was my gift to her for when I officially made her Luna. The full moon would come in a few days and it was then that the ritual would be held. I had been looking at the necklace when Elaheh burst in to complain about my father being here and I snapped the box shut and threw it into the drawer. I was lucky that she had been so caught up in her issues with my father otherwise it would have been difficult to lie to her.
My father had been sitting in my office with me for about half an hour. At first, he didn't say anything, simply looked around the room with a faraway look in his eyes and I imagine he was remembering all the times he spent sitting where I currently sat.
We spent some time talking about my health and how I was feeling, what I was doing to get back on my feet which was mostly sparring with Chad and Elaheh. Jake was slowly starting to come out of his house. He never smiled, never laughed, never had a go at Elaheh like he used to. He was like a shell of the person he used to be.
"Caroline and I will be leaving soon." My father said.
I frowned. He was leaving again? "I thought you would take over the Silverback pack. God knows they could use an Alpha."
"My days of being a leader are in the past son."
"Then why can't you come back here?" I asked. I knew I was beginning to sound like a whiny child but for some reason, that was the least of my concerns.
"This is no longer the life for me. I would never feel free here." He replied and I could almost feel my eyes turn silver.
"So you're leaving again. You never planned to stay did you?" I asked and he shook his head.
"I am going to leave but... I want you to come with me." He said and I froze.
"What?" I asked.
"Your wolf is not meant for the pack life. It's meant to be free, to do what it wants and go where it wants." My father explained. "Come with me and your wolf can have all that. You can have all that."
"What about my pack?" I asked. "Am I supposed to abandon them?"
"Your pack has capable people to take your place. Chad for example. He could lead your pack. You don't have to be responsible for everyone else anymore. The burden has been yours for too long."
It was tempting. Being free. My wolf not having to tiptoe all the time. Letting go. But even as I thought about it, I doubted that life was for me.
"What about Elaheh?" I asked.
"I've seen the way she looks at you. She'd follow you anywhere. You'll only need each other." He said although I could tell that he'd be happy if she didn't come along.
"Yes, I know she will...but does that make it okay to ask her to? " He looked confused at my question.
"Her family is here...her friends are here. By asking her to follow me, I'd be asking her to leave behind everyone she loves. Chad and Alyssa would never hold me back. If anything happened to them, they know I would come back for their child so there isn't anything holding me here. I have no family or any other kind of attachments but Elaheh does. Her brother, Jenna, Jackie and Eric. Too many people love her and to rip her away from them just for a little freedom would be selfish."
"She would understand and so would they. They would never ask her to stay just for them." He countered. Yes, I guess in a way we were all a bunch of martyrs.
"Do you really think she'd be happy? For a while, she'll be okay and because she'd be with me she'd be able to get on but she'd never be truly happy. If she and I have children, they'd grow up without a place to call home. They would never have a place to go back to. She's my family. She's the only thing I care about. She has suffered enough in the past and I'll do everything in my power to make sure that she stays happy."
"So you're willing to give up your freedom and happiness for hers?" He asked.
"Who said I'm giving up anything? I've never in my life been happier and she's the cause for it. She is my freedom. Before her, I'd just been this beast with a darkness in his heart. Always angry, always thirsty for blood. She brought in the light. She freed me from my own hatred and anger. She brought me strength." My father just stared at me and I continued, "besides, my wolves depend on me to be their leader. I rebuilt this pack from its ashes and I made it stronger than any other pack. I put blood and sweat into this pack and it'd be a waste to abandon it now. They're my people and I don't think leaving them on a whim would be the right thing to do. Plus my wolf could use the discipline. You see, I don't particularly like playing the role of the beast. Elaheh makes me feel like a man and I like that feeling. Letting my wolf run free would mean more death and more blood. That's not what I want."
There was a long silence. "I see you have made up your mind then." My father sighed and I simply nodded.
"You've grown...as a person. You have become wise and strong. Everything I dreamed you'd be but without my help. I wish I could have seen it happen. I'm very proud of you son."
My heart thumped rapidly at his words. His approval was not something I was seeking but to have it nonetheless... evoked feelings of sadness, bitterness and a weird sense of accomplishment.
He stood up and I stood along with him. He headed to the door, pausing with his hand on the doorknob. "If there ever comes a day when you need my help, I'll be there. This time... I'll be there."
My voice didn't seem to be working. I wanted to thank him or tell him to get lost. Something. But my words just got stuck in my throat. When he realized that he would be getting no response, he smiled sadly and opened the door.
I was surprised to see Elaheh standing outside looking like a deer caught in headlights and I wanted to laugh. The tension I was feeling immediately evaporated.
He nodded to her and she nodded back. I sat down heavily and sighed, shutting my eyes. I felt her weight as she sank into my lap with her head on my chest. I pulled her close so that her legs were hanging over the arm of the chair.
"How much did you hear?" I asked and she gulped, making me smile.
"Enough." She said and I looked at her. "Are you sure you want to stay here? I could sense that there was a bit of longing to go with him."
She was looking up at me now with her big blue eyes. I rested my forehead against hers.
"It was tempting at first but the more I thought about it, the worse the idea seemed to get," I explained.
"Because of me." She stated and I chuckled. " You don't want to take me away from my home so you're willing to put your needs aside."
"Elaheh, you're the only thing I need. While I know you'll follow me anywhere, you should know that I'd do the same for you. This is your home...and you are my mine. I don't care where I am as long as you're there with me. If that is here then I'm good. So don't go thinking I'm giving something up."
Her eyes were overflowing with emotion and I kissed her forehead. She searched my face for any signs of lies and when she found none, she tilted her head to kiss me. I tightened my grip on her and deepened the kiss. I'd never get tired of this. The feeling of her in my arms, her warmth, the sound of her heart, the colour of her cheeks after I kissed her. There was only one word I could use to describe what she was to me. Everything.
She was everything.
"I have to tell you something," I said when we finally broke apart.
When she looked up at me with questioning eyes I took a deep breath. This was it, if she fell asleep this time, she had it.
"I love you Elaheh." She gasped and her cheeks turned a deeper shade of red. I was enjoying her reaction when suddenly it took a turn and her eyes turned challenging.
"I beat you to it." She said and I cocked an eyebrow.
"Oh?"
"During the battle. Before you fell unconscious, I told you that I love you. "
So that was what had brought on that feeling.
"Please I said it way before that." I retorted and she looked confused. "That night."
Her confusion only grew. "What night?" She asked and when my lip twitched as I tried not to smile, it clicked in her brain. I was almost surprised that she could get redder.
"You fell asleep." I accused and she jumped off my lap.
"Then it doesn't count!" She exclaimed.
"At least it didn't take you nearly dying for me to say it." I shot back and she immediately looked embarrassed, making me laugh.
"I don't care! I said it first and that's that." She proclaimed.
"Why must you turn everything into a competition? " I asked laughing.
"Don't be a sore loser." She teased.
"You're a sore loser!" I shot back, well aware of how childish it made me sound and I loved it.
"Tell you what, if you catch me then I'll step down and give you the victory." She offered and I smiled evilly.
In a flash, I was up and lunging for her. She squealed as she dashed away and sprinted through the door.
I wondered if they could hear the sound of laughter from the outside. A sound that hadn't been a part of that house since I was nine.
I let her win that day, just like I would always let her win in the years to come. The laughter in her eyes and that cheeky grin were all the victory I needed. I think she knew though when I let her win. I think she always knew.
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Well... It's over kids. This journey has been great and the support I've received from all of you has honestly meant a lot and pushed me to finish the book which otherwise I might not have finished. That being said, I don't know whether to do an epilogue/afterword sort of thing to give you a glimpse into their life after the story so I guess I'll leave it to you guys. If you want it, please let me know.
Again, I can't emphasize enough how thankful I am to all of those who took the time to read the book. Whether you were a silent reader or commented on every chapter, it all meant everything to me.
Also, I'd like to thank my family and my friends for being so encouraging about my writing and nagging me to update every week. XD thanks. I love you.
If I do write more books, I hope you will continue to read them.
Okay now, this is just getting long and awkward so byeee!!!!
Love,
Aniha.
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