Elena's POV
I move my hand to pat the space beside me, only to come in touch with empty soft sheets. I slowly open my eyes and sit up. I notice a small amount of brightness fulfilling the room. A figure sitting on a chair with their head bent down in front , comes into my sight.
I stand up and shiver from how cold the floor feels against my bare feet.
With small steps I move towards him. He doesn't seem to hear my steps as he jumps when I put my arms around his neck. My head comes in contact with his bare shoulder, parts of my hair falling across my eyes. I notice some kind of a notebook sitting on the desk in front of him.
In one quick movement, he closes the notebook and turns his head to me.
"What are you doing awake?" his voice is quiet and raspy.
"I should be asking you the same question." I respond as quiet as him. He takes my wrists slowly and unwraps my arms. He stands up and goes over to me. He takes bits of my hair that has fallen on my face and slowly tucks them behind my ear. He uses his thumb to caress my cheek as I simply stand there, melting under his touch.
"I was just writing down some stuff." He bites the inside of the cheek as we both move towards the bed and then get under the covers.
I think about what "stuff" he could be writing. Is it about Eleanor? Did our conversation earlier made him think about the past? Does he still think about her as much as he used to? What could he be doing in the middle of night? What even is that notebook?
"You're overthinking it. Again." He chuckles.
I turn my head towards him and see the soft smile plastered on his beautiful face.
"If you wanna ask me something, just do it. I don't want you to be afraid to ask me anything. It's okay to be curious." He bites his lip and raises his eyebrows.
"My question is how did I get so lucky?" I look at him in the eyes and see a little twinkle. He takes me by my hips and swiftly flips me on top of him.
He sends me a soft smile. "No, how did I get so lucky?" He gives me a soft peck on the lips, leaving me wanting for more. "Now, what was your real question?"
I look down as thoughts start running through my head at a ridiculously fast pace. I try to gather my thoughts in one place and form a proper sentence. I can feel his burning gaze and that causes me to feel some kind of pressure. I take a deep breath and finally look at him in the eyes.
The look on his face hasn't changed as he waits for me utter the words. Why is this so hard? Why can't I just spit what I want to ask him? Why does it have to be so problematic? It's just a simple question.
Then spit it out.
"Do you still love her?" I blurt out the words before I can even process what was rolling out of tongue.
His eyes widen a bit as he swallows thickly. I guess I took him by surprise. He wasn't expecting that kind of question. Hell, I didn't expect that. Way to go Elena. Now you scared him. Why do I have to be so stupid?
"Hey, you are not stupid." He smiles lightly as I realize that I said that out loud.
I purse my lips and bite my bottom lip so hard, I wouldn't be surprised if blood appeared.
"No."
I look up only to meet his piercing eyes looking in mine. The intensity behind his pupils is unreal as I glance down.
"Actually, there's another side of the story that I didn't tell you. I mean it's not that it's not important, it's just that it's not relevant now."
"Hey" I take his hands and softly kiss his knuckles. "We're too deep in this, and I want to go deeper."
"Are you sure you're talking about our relationship or about something else?" he raises his eyebrow and his mouth turns up into a smirk.
I widen my eyes in shock and then close them while lazily shaking my head. "You're such an idiot." I let out a quiet chuckle. "But no, I want more of you, more of us, and I want to know more about you."
He lets out a sigh and starts playing with my fingers. His eyebrows are furrowed in concentration. A minute or so passed and he's still fiddling with my fingers. His voice is raw, but at same time quiet and full of honesty as he starts talking.
"After the accident, I was in a really bad place. Losing her was like-" He closes his eyes shut and gulps. When he reopens them, I can see nothing but pain behind them. "It was painful."
He takes a few shaky breaths before continuing. "I started hanging out with the wrong guys, I just-I, I wanted to feel that feeling I got whenever I was with her. And well, wrong guys bring wrong decisions." He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair with his one hand.
"Well never mind, a while passed, actually, it passed exactly six months since she died and I remember I asked Niall what day it was-"
"Wait, who's Niall?"
A sweet smile creeps on his face as he shakes his head. "We'll get to that part."
"Okay." I still felt uneasy about this Niall guy, Harry has never mentioned him before.
"And then I saw the date and it's like I was back to where I had been six months before that. I stopped taking everything I took. I guess I just realized that there was no point in destroying yourself when you're already destroyed enough."
As he mentions the word destroyed, I can feel a shiver going down my spine, and goosebumps appearing all over my body. I blink away the tears that have formed in my eyes as I stay focused on the words leaving his plump lips.
Destroyed. That exact word brings me back to that night. Flashbacks consume my thoughts as I gulp down the lump that has formed in my throat. I shake my head in order to get rid of them. Luckily, Harry hasn't noticed my short zoning out.
I'm not ready to tell him that story. At least not yet. It can wait. Yes, it can wait.
But he just told you his life story. Don't you think it's your turn now?
Sigh.
Not yet.
"But, I was very lucky to have my friends though." A sweet smile appears on his face. "Niall, Liam and Louis."
"What are they like?"
"Well, Niall is my best buddy. We've been friends since we were 4. His laugh made my day every day." He lets out a deep chuckle. "I met Liam and Louis when I started going to school. Liam is such a good guy, he wouldn't hurt a fly. I always went to him for advice. However, Louis is a whole different story."
"How come?"
"Basically, his middle name is trouble. He always went against the rules. I remember this one time, god that kid is crazy" he mumbles under his breath, "I think we were 16, and there was a school play. In the end, there was going to be like confetti. He changed the confetti with paint, and just everything was covered in paint." A faded smile is plastered on his face.
"Seems like you guys were quite the group, huh?" I'm happy to know that Harry had friends like that to support him in his toughest times.
"Yea."
"Well, where do they live? Where are they now?"
A sigh escapes his lips. "They live in London."
"Did you guys have like a plan or something? They move to London and you to Manchester?" I furrow my eyebrows as confusion overtakes me.
"No, actually, the plan was for the four of us to go study music in London, but things happened and well, here we are."
A small, but noticeable pout settles on his lips as he looks down to our tangled hands.
"Well, then why didn't you-"
"I'm sorry babe, I'm really tired, can we just go to sleep now?"
The way that he cut off our, might I add very important, conversation, set an unsettling feeling in the pit of my stomach. Still, I nodded and rolled off of him.
Harry turned off the light at the nightstand and wrapped his arms around me. I placed my arm around his stomach and leaned my head on his shoulder. We were sure to not leave any space between us. Once again, he placed a soft kiss on my forehead and that was all it took, for me to fall asleep.