Levi's POV
I stare at her in disbelief. Shaking my head slightly, I say, "You're not serious, are you?"
She nods. "Yes, I am. I'm ready to go back."
"Going back is fine, but going out on an expedition? That's foolish," I tell her.
"What do you mean? You don't think I'm capable of going out on an expedition?" She narrows her eyes, growing defensive.
I hesitate. I believe she is capable of it, but I just don't want her to. Before the accident, it was already extremely dangerous for her to go beyond the walls, but now... I don't want to lose her. I can't lose her. I shake my head again. "It's not that. I just don't think it's a good idea. You just got used to the prosthetic."
"Yes, and now I'm eager to actually use it. So I'm going on this expedition."
"No, you're not," I say coolly.
She stands, glaring down at me. "Yes, I am."
I stand up, meeting her gaze. She looks up at me, green eyes narrowed in anger. "Verena, don't do this. You don't know what you're doing."
"I know exactly what I'm doing. Levi, you can't stop me, and you're not going to change my mind, so stop trying," she hisses.
Rage boils up inside of me, and I am reminded of how I tried to convince Isabel and Farlan to stay behind. They should have listened to me, and Verena should, too. Clenching my fists tightly, I step closer to her and growl, "Fine. If you're not going to listen to me, then I'm not going to waste my breath." Without another word, I whip around and head for the door. She barely has time to open her mouth before I slip out of the room, slamming the door behind me.
Verena's POV
I wince as the door slams shut, feeling angry and hurt. Why is he getting so upset? Sighing, I slump back down on the bed. Glancing down at my new uniform, I grab the green cloak off of the top of the pile. My fingers run over the emblem on the back. The Wings of Freedom...
"Mama!"
I leap into mama's arms as she walks in through the door. She cradles me against her, holding me close. "I've missed you, my little raven," she says, rubbing her nose against mine.
I giggle as she bends down to let me go. "I've missed you too, mama." I stand in front of her, smiling wide. Her deep green eyes are shining as she smiles back at me. She ruffles my hair, and I quickly try to fix it.
"I see you wore your hair down today," she notes.
"I don't like pigtails anymore."
"And why not?"
"They're too childish," I explain.
"Oh, I see. You're too grown up for pigtails now." I give an affirmative nod. "When did my little raven grow up so fast?" She gently pinches my cheeks, making me giggle again.
"Mama, can I wear your cape?" I ask, grabbing at the green fabric draped over her shoulders.
Mama slips it off of her and hands it to me. "Yes, you can, but it's not a cape, Verena. It's a cloak," she tells me, correcting.
"Oh...A Cloak..." I mumble, draping it over my small shoulders. The cloak swallows my tiny body, and I smile. "Look, mama! I'm you!" She smiles as I put my arms out and pretend to fly around like she does on her gear. My little feet move swiftly across the floor as I race around the room. I catch sight of myself in the mirror. The emblem on the back of the cloak waves with the fabric as I move, and it almost looks like I have wings.
***
A small smile creeps onto my face, and I press the cloak against my chest. Closing my eyes, I breathe, "I miss you, mama."
Levi's POV
As I come up to Erwin's room, I notice that the door is slightly ajar. Without thinking, I kick it open the rest of the way and storm into the room. Erwin is sitting at his desk, flipping through papers. He looks up at the sound of my rude entrance and raises an eyebrow. "Levi? What is it?"
"You're f*cking allowing Verena to come on the next expedition?!" I shout.
"Why are you so angry? You were the one who told me how she was doing so well, and that you thought it was time for her to come back," he says, confused.
"Yes, but not back out there!" I hiss, referencing to the land beyond the walls.
Erwin sets the papers down and leans back in his chair. "Levi, I've said this before, but...Verena is a very strong person. She'll be fine. I wouldn't allow her to come out with us if I didn't think she was ready. She's my friend-"
"I've seen what you've done to your 'friends', Erwin. Saying that doesn't mean shit."
"Well, even so, it's what she wants. Shouldn't you at least respect her decision?"
"And what if it's the wrong one?"
"It's still her decision, even if it is the wrong one."
I clench my fists, glaring at him. My rage is boiling over, and I want to yell at him, but I bite my tongue.
"Why are you so upset about this anyway? This isn't like you," he says, furrowing his brows.
"She's my friend."
"Yes, but...It's something more than that, isn't it?" His eyes narrow at me, and I can see that he's figuring it out. I falter, not sure what to say. My heart is beating rapidly. "You don't have to answer. I think I already got one." He sits back in his chair, a small smile on his face. He looks almost smug about it.
I narrow my eyes at him. Damn you, Erwin.
"Look, Levi, I can't stop her, and neither can you. All you can do now is be there for her." He turns back to his papers, leafing through them again. "I haven't sent out the paperwork yet, but I intend on giving you your own squad when Verena returns. There are some new recruits we got a week ago. I have assigned them temporary squads for the moment. If you'd like, you could choose your squad members. Now, if that was all you needed to talk to me about, I really need to get back to this paperwork."
I am seething with rage, but I bite my lip, holding back the foul words I want to spew at him. Without a word, I turn around and walk out of the room. I walk down the hall, headed back to my room. I've already lost so much. Farlan...Isabel....I won't lose Verena, too. I can't.
***
The next two weeks go by in a blur. Commander Shadis steps down, and Erwin is promoted. Shortly after he left though, a few Scouts caught wind that the Commander-in-chief had placed Shadis in charge of the instruction of the new trainees. After he was placed in charge, Erwin allowed me to select my new squad. It felt strange picking soldiers that would be my subordinates. Even though I had been Verena's replacement for a while, I still did not feel quite like a leader. My new squad and I trained hard, working with the 3-D maneuver gear almost every day. In the course of the two weeks, I did not see Verena once. I had gone to her room, but I could not bring myself to go inside. She probably would not want to see me anyway.
"Captain! Captain!"
I stop and turn to see Petra, one of my new subordinates, racing down the hall towards me. She stops, breathing heavily.
"What is it?" I ask.
Her amber eyes meet mine and she says, "I was wondering if I could talk to you about the expedition, sir."
"What about it?" I turn and start down the hall again. Petra walks with me, hanging back slightly.
"Well, I just wanted to know-" She stops mid-sentence when I freeze. Petra steps forward, giving me a concerned look. "Captain?" I do not answer her. My eyes are locked on two familiar people strolling down the hall, heading in our direction. Petra follows my gaze. "Isn't that Squad Leader Verena Adler?"
I nod. "Yes, it is."
"Who is that with her?" she inquires.
"Her new second-in-command, Markus Ritter."
Verena looks up and stops a few feet away from us. Her green eyes meet mine, and her voice trails off. Markus furrows his brows, and then turns to Petra and me. A smile spreads across his face, and he closes the gap between us, Verena trailing slowly behind him.
"Hi, Levi. Miss me?" he greets me cheekily.
"Well, I don't miss the messes you made almost constantly," I reply, giving him a slightly irritated look, tearing my gaze away from Verena.
Markus rolls his eyes. "Let me give you a little heads-up: Levi is a clean freak. He will make you clean until you collapse from exhaustion," he tells Petra. She stares at him, her mouth opening slightly. It's clear that she is unsure of what to say. Markus chuckles a little, and then nudges Verena. "We better get going. We still have that meeting with Erwin."
"You have a meeting with Erwin?" I ask, my gaze snapping back to Verena.
"Yes. It's about a private matter. It doesn't concern you, Levi," she tells me, saying the last part in a hushed voice.
I narrow my eyes at her. The hell it doesn't. "Is it about your leg?" I blurt out.
Her eyes widen slightly, and then narrow at me. "Like I said, it doesn't concern you, Levi. Now, if you'll excuse me..." She steps around me, and I am overwhelmed by the smell of her sweet perfume. My heart skips a beat, and all I want to do is take her by the arms and- Stop. Don't think about that.
Markus gives me a small wave. "See you later, Levi." He leans closer to Petra, smiling slyly. "And I really hope I see you later, too," he coos, making her blush. Then, with a grin, he steps around her and heads after Verena. Glancing over my shoulder, I watch them walk down the hall, my gaze focused on Verena. She doesn't even walk with a limp anymore. She strides confidently down the hall, her shoulders back. Not once does she look over her shoulder.
Verena's POV
"Is something going on between you and Levi?"
My head snaps up, and I gape at Markus. "Wh-What do you mean? Th-There's nothing going on between us," I say quickly, growing unnecessarily defensive.
Markus gives me a weird look, raising an eyebrow at me. "Whoa. Calm down. I was just asking. It seemed like you two were mad at each other."
"Oh..." I look down again. Why did I get so anxious suddenly? What do I have to hide? There really isn't anything going on between Levi and me.
"But, hey, it's probably none of my business," he says, shrugging.
Silence grows between us, and we do not speak again until we reach the meeting room.
***
Running my hand over Shasta's mane, I say to her, "I'm glad to see you again, girl." She whinnies loudly in response. I smile. "I can tell you're glad to see me, too." Taking the reins again, I glance around me. Markus and Hanna are on either side of me. Hanna has a hard look on her face, and I can see the fiery rage burning in her amber eyes. I had been informed a few days ago by Markus that Hanna lost her family in the fall of Wall Maria. This expedition would be a revenge mission for her, a way to strike back at the titans. I'll have to keep an eye on her. People who are blinded by anger can make foolish mistakes, and I don't want to lose a good squad member and friend. My gaze shifts to the three new recruits we received earlier this week: Laura, Dieter, and Ivan. Dieter and Ivan are conversing anxiously about something, and Laura is rolling her eyes at them. I smile. I'll keep an eye on them as well.
I turn forward, catching sight of Levi. He's a little ways away from me, his eyes focused ahead of us. I gaze over at him, and after a few moments, Levi turns and, seeing me, meets my gaze. We stare at one another for a long time. I can tell he's still upset with me for going through with this. He's just going to have to get over it. Going on today's expedition was my decision. His dark eyes narrow slightly, and I can see anger, but also something else in them- worry? Concern? I do not have time to figure it out. The bell chimes out as the gate begins to open. I tear my gaze away from Levi, turning forward again.
Erwin's voice is loud and commanding as he calls out, "Today we begin the journey back to Wall Maria! Today...We start to pathe the path to retaking what the titans stole from us!" Every Scout throws a fist or blade in the air, letting out a fierce battle cry. I join in, feeling the rage and adrenaline surge through my veins. "Everyone...Forward!" Erwin orders loudly, sounding like thunder. Without a moment of hesitation, we all surge forward, our horses galloping quickly towards the gate. I snap the reins, and Shasta takes off. The wind whips past me, and it feels as if I am flying. A smile creeps onto my lips as we come through the gate. Sunshine beams down on me, and overhead, a clear blue sky stretches into the distance. All around me is land I recognize from previous trips to Trost District, but Wall Maria is still far away and there are no boundaries that I can see. For the first time since losing my leg, I feel free. Happiness overflows within me, warming me from the inside out. It really is good to be back.
My squad and I move swiftly over the land. There has been a very few titan sightings in the past hour, a red flare rarely popping up. As we ride, the land becomes more and more familiar to me. We passed a small village a little while back that I remember passing through on my way to Shiganshina. It's odd to think of this land as "titan territory" now.
"Hey, Verena."
I glance at Markus. "What is it? And why are you being so informal?" I ask.
"Sorry. 'Squad Leader' just sounds too formal to say to a friend. Anyway, I was just wondering where Erwin plans to have us stop to resupply and regroup?"
"We'll be passing through a village soon. He plans to stop there. We will be resupplying and regrouping there, as well as setting up a logistics base," I explain.
Markus nods and says, "Good. I'd like to get off this horse for a little. My bu-"
"Okay, that's a little too much information, Markus," Hanna says quickly, cutting him off.
Markus smirks at her. "What? I was just going to say that my-"
"Markus."
He gives me a look. "What? Why can't I-"
"Look," I tell him, pointing to our left where a plume of red smoke has sprouted up. He glances at it and nods. Without having to tell him to, he loads a red flare and shoots it into the sky. Other squads to our right pass it on until we finally see the green flare. I glance in the direction the green flare is pointing and say, "Looks like we're heading more to the right. Pass it on."
Markus, Hanna, and the others head off to the supply carts while I search for Erwin. I find him standing with Mike beside some soldiers who are setting up a tent. They are looking at a crumpled map, pointing to various places. I walk over to them and smile. Erwin looks up and smiles at me, lowering the map.
"How are you doing?" he asks, gesturing to my leg.
I pat my thigh lightly and reply, "I'm doing well. It seems to be holding up."
"That's good." Erwin glances at the map and then at me. "Oh, Mike and I were just discussing what route would be best to take from here. We have two choices: we can shift more to the west and then swing down toward Shiganshina, which would allow us to avoid a forest, but it wastes time, or we can continue straight from here to Shiganshina. If we pick the latter route, we would either have to go around the forest when we came upon it, or we would have to pass through it- which would be quite difficult with the long-range scouting formation."
"Well, even though it wastes time, I would say to shift more to the west and avoid the forest. That way the formation won't be compromised. Besides, it would probably waste even more time just trying to go around the forest depending on its size," I tell him. I shrug and add, "Either way, it's up to you...Commander." Erwin's blue eyes widen slightly, and I smile. "I'm going to have to get used to calling you that now."
I open my mouth to say something else, when Mike blurts out, "Titans." We both turn to him and watch as he sniffs the air. "Five approaching fast from the south."
Erwin clenches his fists, crushing the map in his hand. "They're being attracted here. There's too many of us gathered in one place."
"We'll take care of them," I say, glancing at Mike.
Erwin looks at us and shakes his head slightly. "You can't do it by yourselves."
"We'll take our squads with us. Alert the other soldiers though," Mike tells him.
"Alright. Go now and don't let them anyway near here," Erwin orders.
We both salute him, and I have to force myself not to smile. It is still odd to me that he is my superior now. That's going to take some getting used to.
Mike and I gather our squads and head for the edge of the village. We leave our horses behind and switch to 3-D maneuver gear. I land on the roof of a building, and my eyes scan the land stretching out before me for titans. Mike stands on the building beside mine, sniffing the air every now and then. There's silence for a long time, every one of us on high alert. My muscles are tense, and I can feel my blood pumping in my veins. This is it. This will be the first time I fight since.... My mind wanders back to when that titan caught me in the air, and I can clearly recall the pain that ripped through me like lightning when it bit my leg. Clenching my fists, I take in a deep breath and push the memory to the back of my mind. You can do this. You're a Scout.
Suddenly, Mike's voice rings out, crisp and clear, "Here they come!"
And then I see them. Five titans are barrelling towards us, and I feel my heart skip a beat. Unsheathing my blades, I stand at the ready.
It's now or never.
Levi's POV
As I make my way past the crowd of soldiers surrounding the supply carts, I glance around for Verena, but I cannot seem to find her or her squad. A feeling of panic washes over me, and I look at the throng of soldiers around the supply carts, searching for her face in the crowd. "Shit," I mutter, turning away. Where is she? My mind starts to wander through the possibilities, and I grow more and more concerned. Damn it. Where are you, you idiot?
I am about to head to where the horses are tied up when I catch sight of Erwin heading over to the supply carts. There's a serious look on his face as I approach him. "Erwin." He stops and turns to me.
"Levi, I was just coming to-"
"Where's Verena?" I ask, interrupting him.
"Well, I was coming here to alert the soldiers-"
"Why? Erwin, what's going on?"
"There are five titans approaching from the south. I want everyone to be prepared in case one of them slips through our defense," he explains.
"Our defense?"
"Yes. Verena and Mike took their squads to-"
Anger explodes within me. "You let her go?" I growl.
Erwin steps closer, leaning down a little. His voice is hushed as he speaks, "Levi, I have faith in her and her abilities. Do you?" Without waiting for an answer, he turns away and heads for the cluster of Scouts. I glare at him as he clears his throat, gaining their attention. I do not wait to hear his announcement. I whip around and head toward a nearby building. Grabbing the hand grips, I pull the triggers, and the black cables fly through the air. The grapple hooks dig into the side of the building, and I am lifted into the air. I will not take the chance. I will not make the wrong decision again.
Verena's POV
I land on the roof of a building, my boots hitting hard against the shingles. I wince, noticing that the prosthetic is a little loose. I don't think it'll detach, but... I glance down at my right leg, narrowing my eyes. After we finish up here, I should tighten the strap. Titan blood is spattered all over my clothes, and steam rises off of me as it begins to dissipate. Taking a moment, I glance around. Three more titans have shown up since we took care of the last five. We have only had one casualty, and it was a young soldier from Mike's squad. He had been snatched off of a roof after he ran out of gas. I tried to save him, but I was too far away. Gripping my blades tightly, I glare at the fifteen meter titan lumbering towards me. Its wide smile is almost mocking. The titan sees me and reaches out to grab me. I am about to attack, when I see a flash of green pass by me. Eyes wide, I watch as another Scout whizzes by me, evades the titan's hand, and goes for the nape. Blood spurts into the air as the soldier cuts through the titan's flesh. As the titan falls forward, crashing down onto the roof a few meters away from me, I get a glimpse of the soldier who took it down. His black hair is waving slightly in the breeze, and his dark gaze is locked on me. He lands on the roof of the building across from me, and I give him an angry look. Levi...
Levi's POV
Verena's green eyes are narrowed, and even from here I can see the anger in them. Steam rolls off her body as the titan blood on her uniform starts to disappear. She stands with her weight on her left leg, and it makes me wonder if her right leg is hurting her.
"What the hell is wrong with you?!" she shouts at me. I furrow my brows, confused. She takes a step forward. "Why are you even here?"
"I came to..." My voice trails off. Why am I here? I wanted to make sure she was okay? Is that it?
Verena doesn't wait for me to answer. "Just back off! I can do things by myself!"
"What the hell happens if you can't?" I yell back, anger bubbling up again.
"Why don't you just have faith in me, Levi?" she asks, her tone changing. She sounds hurt, offended even.
I hesitate for a moment. Because if I do, she could end up dead..just like them. I trusted in Isabel and Farlan and look what happened to them. I don't want to lose her, too. Shaking my head, I say, "There's no guarantee with that." There's always a guarantee if I choose to trust in myself.
She gapes at me for a moment, and then, without warning, she explodes, "Damn it, Levi, you're just going to have to get over that! I am not a child! I can take care of myself!"
I cannot hold back my rage anymore, snapping at her, "Stop acting like a child then! You never even considered the dangers this expedition poses for you, you idiot!"
"Why are you so angry about this? Why do you care so damn much?!"
I freeze. Why do I care so much? Because...Because I... I grip my blades tightly, my knuckles turning white. My heart is beating so fast that it feels like it might burst from my chest. The blood roars in my ears, and I feel adrenaline pumping through my veins. I don't want to get hurt, but I can't ignore this anymore. No more holding back. The cables snake out as I hit the trigger, the grapple hooks finding their mark. I jump off the roof, allowing the gas to propel me forward. The cables retreat back into the gear as I land on the roof in front of Verena.
Verena's POV
Levi sheathes his blades and moves toward me. "You want to know why?" he says in an eerily calm voice. I take a few steps back, but I am forced to stop when my back hits the cool brick of the chimney jutting up from the roof. Levi advances quickly, stepping between my blades and getting so close to me that I can feel his warm breath. The heat rises in my cheeks. I barely have time to ask him what is going on when his hands gently grab my face, and he pulls me forward. Then, his lips are on mine.
My eyes widen, and my hands loosen their grip on my blades. My heart flutters, and it feels like a rush of adrenaline. My body relaxes as I sink into the kiss, closing my eyes. Levi is...Kissing me, and it doesn't feel wrong. His lips are soft, and I start to enjoy the feeling of them pressed against mine. Complicated or not, I don't want him to stop. However, after a few moments, Levi pulls away, looking down at me. I gaze up at him, breathless. His eyes are filled with an intensity, a passion, and there is an expression on his face I have never seen before- desire, yearning, want?
In a low voice, he whispers, "Because I love you."