We live in a world where teenagers are expected to know what they want to do with their lives. Meanwhile, adults are expected to hold good jobs, get married, have kids, buy a home, save money, invest, and so much more. When facing so many expectations over your life, it's easy to feel inadequate and lose yourself trying to meet societal expectations. The thing is, life is not linear. No one gets from point A to point B through a journey without any tribulations.
If you want to know the truth about life, talk to older people. You will be surprised at how much information is left out of success stories. For example, very few people will tell you about the life that rich aunt or uncle lived before making money. Successful people often omit the struggles, failures, and detours that were part of their journey.
That feeling of being lost sometimes comes from comparing your life with what is expected of you. Social media, movies, and stories often portray a perfect life, leading to unrealistic expectations. Sadly, only a few loved ones will expect you to be healthy and happy. That’s why I propose that you set new expectations for your life.
Think about this: if you go to a new mall, carnival, or festival, the idea of having fun is to walk around aimlessly as you wait for the main events. In the process of wandering, you discover fun activities, food, shops, and so much more. Why not approach your life as an exploration at a festival?
Of course, you need to figure out things like a source of income and how to meet your basic needs first. After that, experiment with various aspects of your life to see what works.
One of the best approaches is the Fail Fast Method. It proposes that you segment your experiments into 3-month projects. For three months, put your best effort into something you’ve always wanted to try and then evaluate your progress once the time limit is over. The Fail Fast Method is a great way to discover what you are good at, what you like or dislike, and even find a new path in life. The fact that you are aware there is a significant possibility of failure takes away the pressure to succeed. In other words, you get to try out new things just for the fun of it.
In case you are not convinced that the feeling of being lost or losing yourself is normal, here are some things to consider. Google how many experiments it took to create new technologies. You’ll find that research and development departments are paid to fail until they find something that works. All of the advancements we have made as humans are because there were many failures in the beginning.
Thomas Edison famously said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Edison's perseverance through numerous failures led to the invention of the light bulb. J.K. Rowling faced multiple rejections from publishers and was living on welfare before her success with Harry Potter. Steve Jobs was fired from Apple, the company he co-founded, only to return years later to revolutionize it with products like the iPod and iPhone.
Another example is parenting. There are so many theories on the right and wrong way to do it. Yet parents raise their kids the best way they can without realizing how they will turn out. By the time a child becomes an adult, their parent can’t change how they raised them. There are lots of things in life that happen blindly, and yet it doesn’t make them bad.
If you can afford to sleep each day to see the next, then you can afford to feel lost without getting scared about finding your way. The right path will come to you when you are ready to follow it. Remember, feeling lost is a natural part of life. Embrace it as an opportunity to explore and discover what truly makes you happy.