Hi friends ♥️ new chapter! Yay!
Sooo as we saw, Joshie finally told them about alllll of the stuff that happened in his past relationship and ty got a liiiiittle bit angry 👀🥺 and soooo this chapter is the ~aftermath~ of the conversation 😌 de they're sweet and this is a nice chapter 🥺
Please enjoy, thank you for reading! I'll see you Monday at the next one, all my love! ♥️ quite a long one this time!
Word count: 4147
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"Here you go, my sweeties", Lucas said as he handed a cup of hot cocoa to Josh as well as Tyler, as they sat on their couch after everything had calmed down and all four of them had talked about what happened to Josh. They talked about the situation that happened and how awful it was, how glad they were that it was over, how much they hated the guy's guts, and also about how Tyler reacted. Now, Josh and Tyler were cuddled up to each other, blanket spread across both laps, as they watched Steve sweep up the broken pieces of glass on the balcony.
"Thanks mom", Tyler joked with a soft smile as he accepted the cup. Lucas let out a laugh. "You're calling me the mom friend of the group?" He asked. Tyler hummed with a nod. Lucas smiled. "I'll take that."
"Thank you for- for this", Josh smiled softly at Lucas. "Of course baby, you're welcome", Lucas told him. He gently ruffled his curls a little. "You deserve all the love and care in the world." That made Josh blush softly.
Lucas then walked to Steve to help him clean up the last few shards, because he wanted to avoid Snickers or any of them stepping into them.
Tyler looked at how his soulmates were once again cleaning up his mess - literally this time - and he felt guilty for reacting the way he did. He just felt so much anger when he learned that Josh had been in such a horrendous relationship that he never deserved. He deserved to be treated so much better, he deserved to be loved so much more and genuinely. What Josh's ex-boyfriend did to him, no one deserved. But certainly not Josh.
"I'm sorry for scaring you", Tyler softly said again, moving even closer to Josh - though there wasn't much room left. "I really shouldn't have... shouldn't have thrown that", he muttered. "I... sometimes I don't- I just don't know how to control myself, how to control that anger... and knowing this dude treated you so horrendously, it just made me livid. I- I'm sorry", he said. "And also... for- for not letting you explain, for telling you I didn't wanna know... for getting angry and upset about that teeny tiny lie in the first place. I... I should've never done that", Tyler said.
"I-it's okay", Josh said. "Sometimes it's hard to... to control what you feel. I can take a lot of things but at some point it gets too much and then the tiniest thing will upset me to no end, even though it's pathetic", he said. "So I... I get it, I don't want you to worry about that anymore okay", he said. "And I'm not scared of you, you didn't scare me", Josh assured him. "I just... didn't expect it, I didn't see it coming and it happened so fast and that just... kind of shocked me", he said. "But I'm not scared of you okay? I don't think you're going to hurt me whether that's purposefully or accidentally. I don't fear that, my safety, at all with you. I promise", Josh said as he looked into Tyler's eyes.
Tyler hadn't noticed he'd been holding his breath, but then he let out a soft sigh of relief. He pressed a kiss atop of Josh's hair. "That makes me so relieved", he said softly. "I'm so glad I got you back J, I was being a total asshole", Tyler sighed softly. He was beating himself up mentally because of it.
"Shh, it's okay, let's just leave that in the past okay? We're not gonna think about that anymore", Josh said as he gently rested his hand on Tyler's. "We're okay again, that's all that matters", he said with a soft smile. Tyler couldn't help but smile softly at that too. He nodded. "Okay."
"You know..." Tyler trailed. "...I didn't say I didn't wanna know because I didn't care", he said. "I mean, I know I literally said that but... I don't know. I was trying to seem like I didn't care but I did... I really did and- and the reason why I said don't tell me is... there's a reason you didn't tell me", Tyler said. "And while I hated knowing you... 'lied' to me - emphasis on hated, past tense, 'cause I was kind of an asshole about it but I absolutely get it now and don't blame you at all - I just... didn't feel good about... about having you tell me just because I wanted to know 'cause I thought you lied. You get what I mean? If there was something you lied about, it would be for a reason... you didn't want to tell me the truth. And I didn't want to force you to share the truth anyways just 'cause it upset me so much... I don't know if that makes any sense", Tyler said.
"You didn't wanna force me to tell you something I wasn't ready for", Josh said. "...exactly", Tyler replied. "But... now you did", he said. "Because I wanted to", Josh replied. "...been wanting to tell you since it all happened", he said, blushing softly. "But I... needed to find the right moment to do so", he said as he looked down at his hands. "I couldn't tell you at the get together today... 'cause we were having fun with my friends and I knew it would make me emotional", Josh said. "Or last night when... the truth or dare stuff happened", Josh blushed. "Would've been a mood kill", he said with a soft laugh. Tyler smiled softly too. "...maybe a little", he said, and Josh let out a soft giggle. "But when we saw each other at the bus... I didn't wanna throw all of that at you either", Josh said. "...and neither at Fred's show or the little after party 'cause it was their evening... and this morning was also not a good moment because of... well, everything from last night", he blushed softly.
"I have been wanting to tell you... I just couldn't find the right moment", Josh said. "I guess... maybe I could've done so at the uh, the coffee house and our walk, but... I don't know", Josh shrugged softly. "Don't continue explaining yourself baby, I get it", Tyler said. "I'm just... just glad that you wanted to tell me but were waiting to find the right moment, instead of feeling forced to tell me when you didn't want to just because I was being an asshole", Tyler said.
"You're not an asshole", Josh said. "I was being one", Tyler said. "I know I was. Steve said I was. So did Lucas. I just... hope I'm not anymore", he said softly.
"Definitely not", Josh replied softly, smiling gently at Tyler. Tyler returned it, then he wrapped his arm around Josh's neck and he hugged him close. "I really appreciate that you told me so much", he softly said. "And while I'm glad I now know... what that guy did to you was so awful J, I can't wrap my head around it. It hurts to know that he got to do that to you for a year. Any time would've been too much but a full year? I'm so, so fucking glad that Fred was able to help you get out of that situation, J", Tyler sighed softly as he pressed a kiss on Josh's hair.
"Fred and I went through so much, emotionally", Josh softly said. "He's really been my rock through all of that... he's so selfless and so caring and just a genuine sweetheart. He really took care of me when I really needed it the most. I let him in even before Colin... because we knew we had a crush on each other and he was my roommate too... I'll always be so grateful to him", he said. He sighed softly. "I hope we will always remain friends."
"Can I ask you how you and Fred broke up?" Tyler asked as he gently threaded his fingers through Josh's hair. Josh noted how much more gentle Tyler was with the questions he now asked. "Oh, uh, yeah", Josh nodded. "Uhm... so he and I were doing well when he was in Detroit in college with me... I didn't think anything would break us", he shrugged softly. "But then he got the offer from the uni he's currently studying at, with the others... he didn't wanna take it so he could stay close to me but I couldn't let him turn down an incredible opportunity that he really wanted, just for me. I really couldn't", Josh said. "So... I encouraged him to take it, to go for it. And finally he did", Josh told Tyler.
"But then... I uh, I kind of started getting worse mentally", Josh said as he looked down. "I didn't pass my second year, so I had to redo it when the rest did pass. Colin and the others graduated college and only a few friends remained here. Fred being one of them, but... he left to go to Indianapolis to study. Felt like he'd... I know this sounds dramatic, but it kind of felt like he'd left me, or abandoned me", Josh rolled his eyes at himself. "Though he never wanted to do it in the first place, because he wanted to stay here with me. I am the one who told him to take the opportunity yet somehow I felt like he abandoned me", Josh said. "...still hate that I ever felt like that", he sighed softly.
"Uhm... when I have my bad moments or- or I don't see people I love in real life for a while and it's just texts or calls... I tend to... push them away", Josh said. "...not proud of that, at all, but... I can't help it", Josh softly said. "And so I... I started doing that with Fred. Started to ignore his calls or his texts and while he tried so hard to reach out and keep up to date with my life and what was going on, especially since we were still together, I just... kind of casted him out", Josh stared at the floor as he toyed with a loose strand of the blanket. "And uh... he didn't know truly how badly I was doing", he said. "But people at campus knew... it was so obvious that even my abusive ex-boyfriend got worried and asked if I was alright", Josh rolled his eyes slightly.
"I talked to my friends here, the ones that were still left, since Colin and Michelle, Gracie etc all graduated as I said", Josh said. "My parents came to talk to my councilor at uni, and... eventually we all decided it was time for me to drop out", Josh said. "...Fred still didn't know about any of it. So... my parents and I drove down to Muncie and I rang the doorbell and Fred opened the door, not knowing I was gonna be there", he said. "He let me in, we talked... and I broke up with him", Josh said. "But... he felt like it was for the best as well, especially since I didn't communicate at all for days, no weeks before that. So while I technically said we should probably break up... it was a mutual decision", Josh said. "But we've been through so much together that neither of us wanted to end everything. We both said we really wanted to remain friends", Josh said. "And uh... yeah, we've been doing great as friends", he smiled softly.
"I'm glad you both decided that it was the best thing for you", Tyler said. "Glad you didn't have to go through the unexpected break up. It probably still hurt as you're still losing your lover, but... I'm just glad you knew it was coming", Tyler said. "Me too", Josh replied. "If Fred had broken up with me sooner than that, when I hadn't seen it coming... my heart would've broken ten times worse", he said.
"Have you and Fred ever talked about... getting back together?" Tyler asked. "Uhm, we have a few times, but... not in several months now. As in, about six months. Last time we did, we decided that we didn't wanna try and make the long distance thing work because it'd be mentally so hard and so exhausting for us to have to put in that daily effort... being close friends is much more effortless and we still see each other regularly and text a lot. It's much better this way and... while he'll always have a special place in my heart, I can confidently say that my days of being in love with him are over", Josh said. "Been able to move on from that for several months now, and so has he", he smiled.
"That's really great", Tyler smiled. "Deciding that not getting together anymore is the best thing, is definitely not the same as actually not having a crush anymore", he chuckled. "So I'm glad you've been able to grow past it and that you and him don't have that anymore; just a whole lot of platonic love for each other now", he smiled. "Yeah", Josh blushed. "I think that'll always remain."
"So Fred is one of your soulmates?" Tyler smiled. "I'd say so, yeah", Josh smiled. "At least I do really see it that way. Never asked if he agrees, but... it feels like he does", he said. "I think he agrees", Tyler said.
"You mind if I..." Tyler trailed as he grabbed his pack of cigarettes. "Not at all", Josh said. "Right, you think it's hot", Tyler said with a soft grin as he reached out to grab the ash tray. "Oh hush", Josh blushed. Tyler gently laughed as he lit the cigarette.
"Alright, that's done", Steve said as he came back outside with Lucas. They sat down on the couch, both with their own cups of hot cocoa now. "Thank you", Tyler told them. "You're welcome baby", Lucas smiled as he pulled his feet up on the couch and he cuddled up to Steve.
"Can I ask you guys something?" Josh then spoke. "'Course love", Lucas replied. "I know how both of you got so close to Tyler, but... how did you get this close to each other?" He asked. "I mean, I know about it a little bit because several years ago I stayed here and you were already pretty close too, but..." Josh trailed. "But not like this", Lucas hummed. Josh nodded.
"Well..." Steve trailed. "Don't know if you remember, or if we mentioned that, but... after Tyler and I moved too fast and he said Luke's name, Lucas and I actually talked on the phone", Steve said. "And... he asked me to give Tyler another chance, 'cause he'd be worth it... he told me Tyler really liked me and felt like he fucked up but he really wanted another chance", Steve said.
"Lucas was willing to let Tyler go if I wouldn't be comfortable with their relationship... but I couldn't do that to Tyler, or to Lucas", Steve said. "When we returned to the US, they were honest", Steve said. "When Lucas and Tyler kissed each other out of habit, as an accident, they immediately told me. I knew I could trust them both", Steve said.
"When we started hanging out after we first met, we just... hit it off", Steve said. "And I guess both having dated Tyler made us understand each other better too", Lucas chuckled. "Oh it did", Steve laughed. "Plus Lucas had great advice", he hummed, making Lucas laugh again. "We just started to get comfortable with each other. Tyler was close with me, his boyfriend - and he was close with Lucas, his soulmate. We'd both cuddle with Tyler, we'd all sleep in the same bed with Tyler in the middle... I feel like either two things could've happened; jealousy and resentment between me and Lucas, or forming a bond and close connection and a shit ton of love for each other, which is what actually happened", he said. "It just felt... right, and Tyler loved it too", Steve smiled. "I did", Tyler hummed with a smile.
"After that truth or dare thing when you were here, and Luke and I kissed... we were afraid it would, like... change things for the worse but it didn't", Steve said. "It just made us even closer. Since we uh..." he trailed as he looked at Lucas.
"Oh you might as well just say it now 'cause he already knows", Lucas said with a soft whine. "The threesomes. He means the threesomes", he clarified. Steve chuckled. "Right", he said. "Since that happened, we got comfortable with each other on a whoooole other level", he chuckled. "Though we'd already seen each other naked and all that. But now there was no... no barrier anymore", he said. "We could touch each other, or look at each other, and feel perfectly comfortable and fine with it after that", he said. "So our connection kept growing as well. It's like... at first we had this relationship because of Tyler, but at some point it started to become more just between us too. Of course Tyler would always be part of that, of us, but if something were to happen... like me and Ty breaking up, it felt like I'd still have Lucas because it wasn't just because of Tyler anymore. You get what I mean?" He asked. Josh nodded.
"So eventually we did break up and while Lucas mainly took care of Tyler since they both live in Ohio, he also drove to Detroit several times to just check up and take care of and be with me for a few days", Steve said.
"We just became really close over the years. When Tyler told us he didn't wanna see us anymore, I stayed with Lucas and Rich for days because we both had to... process that, felt like Tyler broke up with both of us, and that just got us even more close. That whole situation made us realize how much we loved and meant to each other, and how much we needed each other to process that we lost Tyler. We loved him so much, it made us love each other even more than we already did. Ten times more even, if that was even possible", he said and Lucas hummed. "We were already really close, we'd already had sex, cuddled, kissed, hugged, done all of that. But losing Tyler..? That's what really brought us so, so immensely close the way we are right now. It's like... tyler and I are incredibly close soulmates. We couldn't be closer", Lucas said. "And Steve and Tyler are too. But... Steve and I now too", Lucas said. "It's... a triangle of three soulmates who all love and cherish and adore and appreciate each other equally as much", he said. "Which is why it felt so right to ask Steve to join our soulmate tattoo. The sun, the moon and the stars. It's us, always, in every way. Me and Ty, me and Steve, Ty and Steve; and all three of us. Intertwined perfectly and so solidly that we know it'll never change", Lucas said. Steve nodded. "Luke and I became two peas in a pod when we lost Tyler", he said.
"But then, luckily, we got Tyler back", Steve smiled. "Back to three peas in a pod", he said with a soft laugh.
"And at that point Luke and I were the closest we'd ever been, and it felt like we were the closest to Tyler we'd ever been too, 'cause there was a lot of hurt and broken hearts and relief to be together again and fear to lose that again. But as I said, all of that happening made us realize that whatever we have, all three of us, is unbreakable", Steve said.
"Well said", Lucas smiled. "And that's right. It's been growing as the years passed up to the point where we feel like nothing will ever break that. It might grow but it'll never decline", he said.
"I love you both", Tyler said. "Oh we love you too baby", Lucas smiled. "And I love you", he told Steve as he kissed his cheek, and Steve returned it with a smile.
"And also now we made it ten times harder on ourself because we narrowed our dating preferences down even more", Steve chuckled. "If they don't accept our soulmates, they're not gonna be our partner. It'd mean they wouldn't be our person", Steve said.
"Damn right", Tyler said. "None of my last three exes were happy with it, but the last one actually made a huge problem out of it and was even successful. I'll never let that happen again", Tyler said. "I'm absolutely fucking desperate to be loved and have a forever partner", Tyler chuckled. "But I'd rather have no partner than have one without being able to keep Steve and Lucas in my life. Absolutely not ever gonna happen again", he said.
"I think the right person would never make you choose between them and your soulmates", Josh said. "Especially after seeing how rewarding it is for all of you... how much you help each other and lean on each other about anything. I think the right person would never feel jealous but instead they'd be happy to know you have such incredible, rewarding, platonic relationships with them. I'd think they'd be genuinely happy to see you, their lover, thrive because of them", Josh said.
"...you said that really beautifully, J", Lucas smiled. "And I think so too. That's pretty much what Richard told me too when I told him that Steve and Tyler were a non-negotiable... he said he never dared to think of them like that in the first place", he said.
Josh smiled. "Richard sounds like a really good person", he said. "He is", Tyler smiled. "Absolutely", Steve replied. "I love the guy." "So do I", Lucas chuckled and Steve let out a laugh. "You better", he smiled.
"Just need to find two more of those", Steve chuckled. "Hopefully sooner rather than later", Tyler hummed.
"I feel like Josh's one."
"...what?" Tyler asked Lucas, who'd just said the words. "I think that Josh's like Richard. He'd be okay with it just the same. If he finds a guy who also has a platonic soulmate, or two, I think he'd be the same as Richard; very accepting and appreciative of it", Lucas said.
"So whoever ends up with Josh... he'll be a lucky guy."
"...I think you're right", Steve said. "I think he'd be like that too. I can't imagine him not being like that", he said. "...yeah", Tyler then said. He looked at Josh. "You're gonna make someone who deserves it really happy some day", he told him. "And they better make you just as happy."
Oh god, I wish it was you, Josh felt himself think and his heart ached slightly. He so badly wanted to tell Tyler that, but there was no way in hell that he could. He couldn't tell him that he had a huge crush on him and wanted to be his boyfriend for the rest of their lives because he'd been having a crush for years now. He absolutely couldn't do that. He didn't wanna creep Tyler out and he didn't wanna risk losing him.
"I- I hope so", Josh said with a soft nod. "I'd... really like that." "You'd really deserve it too", Steve smiled at him softly.
Lucas then yawned, and he stretched his arms. "Man, I'm tired. I'm ready to go to bed, today was a bit exhausting", he said. "Sounds like a good idea to me. Let's get ready for bed", Steve said.
"What D'you say?" Tyler asked. "Wanna do the same?" Josh nodded. "I- yeah I think so", he nodded. "Alright, let's get to bed", Tyler said.
~~
Ahhhhhh they're all such cuties
I love them.
Soo what did you think? I'd really love to hear!! Next chapter is gonna be v fun haha I loved writing that one so I can't wait to show you!! Maybe next week I'll release an extra chapter 👀 please don't forget to leave a vote while you can! Appreciate you all so much, I'll see you Monday, all my love. ♥️✨